nai

I'm tired of wanting more , i think I'm finally worn

Naps hit different when you're using them to avoid being alive

I think for me to get better i have to accept the fact that I'm unlovable and i was made to stay alone forever

If loving me means letting go and wishing me the best, i wish you loved me less

Nobody has ever loved me the way I loved them

What doesn't kill you leaves you bleeding for the rest of your life wishing it did

they say time heals wounds, but mine only rotted deeper

I never had the courage to do it , it's always lingering in the back of my head, i have a way out. Once it gets bad I'll just end it , yet still i keep going because i always remember i have a way out , a way out that i never could get my self to go through, yet whenever i feel ill , i pray to god that it would take me out, god please i can't do this please take my soul I can't take it myself

Without you, i don't yet know quite how to live. i have to learn to be somebody else. I'm living through the Hope of you coming back and we can laugh about it all as if i didn't lose myself millions of times searching for you in every corner of my soul

No matter how far i run away from this emptiness and sadness, it always finds me again

It’s a cruel curse knowing I’ll never have what I crave, yet it swings forever just beyond my reach.

I just want to be loved, held and understood, is this too much to ask for?

The more i try to fit in , The more i stick out. The more i try to belong the more alone i become

“In another life,” why not this life?

And when the bugs start eating my heart they'll taste the sadness that drowned me all these years , they'll get repulsed by the guilt, fear and shame I've carried my whole life for simply growing up unaware of my actions

One day people will be afraid to lose me and i won't be the only one holding on to people with all the power i have