Jul 29
bitch the fuck i can't do anything right like bitch damn you dumb fuck.... use ur brain cunttttt
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bitch the fuck i can't do anything right like bitch damn you dumb fuck.... use ur brain cunttttt
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
every decision means something
Having OCD is so cool because i found maggots in my trash which are a Big Trigger for me and despite hosing it down with bleach while wearing a mask, gloves, and headphones to keep flies out of my orifices I still suddenly feel like I'm turning into Jane Prentiss
when ocd makes you feel guilty for living 😅😅😅😂😂🤣😂😂🤣🤣😂😂🤣😅😅😅😅ahaaaahahaaha when ocd makes you think you are attracted to dogs and the reason you want to adopt one is to harass it 😅🤣😅😂😅😅😂😅😂😅😂😅😂😅😅😂😂😂😅 I love my disorder omg!!!😅😂🤣😂😅😂😂😅😅😂🤣😂😅😅😂
Tw for discussions of sexual stuff in relation to OCD
I wish the whole misconception of all aro people being aroace was true sometimes, because it would solve SO MANY of my obsessions.
“You find that girl attractive? You’re sexually attracted to her? You’re sexually attracted to her without her consent? Wow, that’s evil. You’re an evil pervert.”
“You like smut? With people in it? People that are being objectified? You like people being objectified(even if they’re fictional of age characters)? That is not a good look for you buddy.”
“You find people with larger body types more attractive than thin body types? You mean you’re fetishizing fat people? That’s gross, you’re gross, stop being weird about people having bodies.”
“You’re an inherently sexual being due to your brain being wired that way? You mean Theres some primal, evil force with the ability to harm others within you? So you’re just inherently evil?”
And on and on and on. It sucks! I’m literally just living my life and my brain says “but have you tried not doing that, since that makes you an evil, irredeemable piece of shit?” What did I even do bro???
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
I can’t stop thinking about the fact i am thinking and the voice in my head is my thoughts and my thoughts overlap and they do this to torment me but do they they’re just thoughts, i am thinking about how awful it is to think about my thoughts and i am putting blame on them when i am the thinker? I am not the subject of thinking I am the one committing the action, but the thoughts on my thinking they dwell and i talk about them in third person but it is me who dwells and spirals and i am so uncomfortably aware it makes me sick, i just know i have words in my head and i just have to keep observing them.
tw knives and repetitive thoughts/urges
Whenever I pick up a knife even the tiny ones I use to cut up peppers for my pets I can’t stop thinking about poking it into my eyeballs and I feels physically empty when I deny myself this. Help meeee ToT
I can’t stop thinking about my younger sister when I masturbate.
Trigger warning for a lot of stuff I’m seriously a disgusting human
The title isn’t engagement bait, and I need some advice or help because this is seriously ruining my life and I’m genuinely considering ending it I can’t stand to live another day in my head.
Some context-
I, 16f, have exposed myself to pornographic content since I was about 11 through fanfiction and explicit fanart. I’m not sure of my sexuality but I find myself romantically attracted to men but for some reason, probably due to the porn I’ve consumed, I finish fastest to the thought and sight of women.
I have OCD and have dealt with that from a very young age, and it mainly manifests through self harming behaviours like skin picking, hair pulling, cutting and scratching.
I have been in and out of therapy and am doing relatively better now, after being medicated, however I have never brought up this issue with a therapist or anything, this is my first time ever admitting this.
I think there are some wires crossed in my brain, because things that disgust me cause an unwanted genital reaction, especially to do with people coughing, sniffing, burping and sneezing. I can’t even hear or see someone sniff or blow their nose without feeling a pang of arousal which makes me want to cut or scratch or harm myself to like repent for these feelings.
My younger sister (11 years old now) used to pick her nose A LOT and for some reason that really caused arousal responses in me. I used to sit in the sitting room during lockdown (age ~11/12) under a blanket and touch myself and study her nostrils and watch as she would rub her nose and pick it and suck the snot off her fingers. It really disgusts me, but for some reason it also turns me on and I hate it.
I no longer get myself off as often as I did during lockdown, and I’ve never had any issues with like being stuck inside touching myself and missing out on other things because of it, I’m not addicted to masturbation.
However, every time I do touch myself, I can’t not think of my younger sister. Either her picking her nose, or sometimes flashes of her genitals (I’ve never actively sought out seeing her, but you know we’re siblings it’s gonna happen once or twice that when we’re young we will see eachother naked).
And the issue is, nothing makes me finish faster than those paedophilic, incestuous thoughts. I don’t know why, I feel sick to my stomach I can’t cope anymore. I just want to be fucking normal I’m so disgusting I hate myself. After I finish it’s not even “post nut clarity” it’s post orgasm suicidal thoughts. I want to kill myself.
Can someone please tell me if I’m a horrible horrible person or if this is a thing that happens to other people I seriously need help. I can’t stop I even feel slightly aroused just writing about this and now I feel like I need to vomit or hurt myself or something this is genuinely a cry for help if anyone has any experience with this sort of thing or knows stuff about psychology please comment I can’t deal with this anymore.
Idk if this is even related to ur blog but I NEEDED to get this off my chest
Thoughts don't make you a bad person, and in my opinion they don't even make you gross. Only actions hurt other folks, your thoughts can only hurt you.
Unfortunately this is not a problem I know a lot about, so if anyone has advice, please share.
