The Johnny Appleseed they don’t want you to know about
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Sade Olutola
taylor price
Noah Kahan
occasionally subtle
Not today Justin
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d e v o n
Today's Document
sheepfilms
The Stonewall Inn
Sweet Seals For You, Always
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
will byers stan first human second
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
cherry valley forever

tannertan36

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@lostinmyowndamnmindagain
The Johnny Appleseed they don’t want you to know about

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Conservative beauty standards are back with a vengeance which means it's especially important to go out this summer with bellies out and bodies unshaved. Also be unapologetically disabled with mobility aids and wearable medical devices and stim toys and ear defenders and all that stuff. You need it. People need to see it. Everyone needs to be reminded that life is unquestioningly more enjoyable when you're not living inside an arbitrary set of rules created by people who are offended by all the wrong things.
a squirrel or perhaps a cardinal posted this
How about you mind your own damn business
I still find it pretty funny that in fallout 3 you can get your karma down by just opening Moriarty’s terminal over and over again.
The slavers at paradise falls have heard of me. I’m the guy that opens people’s computers over and over again without asking first.
Butch won’t be my companion. He’s like you’re too intense. You must’ve turned on that computer like 50 times in a row last time.
My forbidden computer touching ways have caught up with me.
The reason I’m doing this in the first place is that a lot of evil karma options in fallout 3 are just inconvenient. Like I could go out of my way to blow up a city or I could not blow up a city and get a much more convenient free house and keep access to their merchants.
So in order to keep getting the full evil karma experience, every time I do something convenient or utilitarian that raises my karma I go back to Moriarty’s Saloon and just open his terminal over and over again.
Thus, my good boy points are eliminated through repeated computer touching and the regulators here are hunting me down for looking at Moriarty’s personal data a hundred times in a row.
What’s really funny about lowering your karma this way is that after you do a major good Karma action and listen to the radio, the radio DJ Three Dog will be like this horrible fucker from vault 101 we all hate him so much you know that guy? He did another fucking thing. He saved a thousand orphans.
If you’re also melting somewhere out there, consider this your daily dose of fan-powered emotional support. And don’t forget to stay hydrated. Happy Caturday 😽🤍

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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tweet sequence of a not-quite-friend and artist i admire that i find myself thinking of constantly
used to think it terribly silly (and kinda funny) when fantasy or sci-fi stories would have people refer to major recent historical events as The Flood or The Incident or The Revolution, and im sure historians fucking hate that because it's not helpful or descriptive, but we sure do be calling it The Pandemic
Also the new linguistic quirk of just saying “it was 2020” as like. The full end of a story. You say “it was 2020” and everyone knows what you mean.
“I was going to get my masters degree but then it was 2020, so yeah”
“I was cast in a play and then it was 2020”
“my boyfriend proposed but then it was 2020”
Hey students, here’s a pro tip: do not write an email to your prof while you’re seriously sick.
Signed, a person who somehow came up with “dear hello, I am sick and not sure if I’ll be alive to come tomorrow and I’m sorry, best slutantions, [name]”.
I mean, if someone wrote that to me, I’d probably believe they were sick.
“Slutantions” has me crying laughing
i once emailed my professor with a migraine. a mistake.
“I amsick will not to choir because i have a heache. i Hope its very and i am so sorry
love,
blue”
the subject line was “OW”
THE SUBJECT LINE IS THE BEST PART JSJFJSJDJS JUST IMAGINE GETTING AN EMAIL WITH NO CONTEXT OTHER THAN “OW”
As someone who has taught college, please send those emails because 1) We WILL believe that; no one would write that on purpose and 2) we need a laugh sometimes.
On the other side of this, once after getting taken to the ER by ambulance, I got an email from the professor whose class I’d passed out in, and the message had no text, just the subject line “you good?”
Reblogging for the last addition
Claritin makes me weird, but I have allergies so there’s about a month and a half block of time where I’m taking Claritin and am just weird most of the time.
Anyway, my last year of college, I got the flu or something in late March and was also taking Mucinex. I told my professor I couldn’t come to class one day by email except I couldnt think of what to say, so my medicated ass decided to make a Fry meme. I think it said something like “Not sure if I can go to class with a head the size of Texas, bottom text.” I didn’t think until the next day that it probably wasn’t socially-acceptable to tell your philosophy professor you weren’t coming to class via Tumblr style memes. When i got back to class, i found that she’d printed it out and taped it to the classroom bulletin board.
Oh shit you guys i turned on my WinXP laptop that I used to use back then.
IT WAS ON THE DESKTOP. THIS IS WHAT I SENT.
It’s even worse than i remember it
I laugh myself hoarse every time this post comes around, so here it is again.
Once emailed a professor from my hospital bed high on painkillers after a really bad car crash which my heart actually stopped the email “Dead cant class sory”
i was very sick over new years and one day i woke up to find i had emailed my manager in the middle of the night:
she said it was the most beautiful sick email she’s ever gotten
what is time but an endless all consuming miasma of void ,?
is the willem dafoe fish sexy
yes, he is sexy
he is kind of sexy for a fish
no, he is not sexy
is willem dafoe "fish sexy?"
yes, he is fish sexy
he is fish sexy for a human
no, he is not fish sexy
tornado spawn point

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*trying to pitch public transportation to Americans* it’s like a legal form of texting while driving
931 days left
the human body when you use it and exist in it
once you realize you don’t actually need to sleep, you can really (stops talking abruptly and stares straight ahead for 4 minutes)
Force Remove Copilot, Recall and More in Windows 11 - zoicware/RemoveWindowsAI

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
I have never, and will never, use "ofc" to mean "of fucking course". It literally stands for OF Course...