Bite Risk

Oh my god.

Scientists have proposed uniting the two events in a kind of Big Bang of capitalism. Not all, of course: a lot of scientists just like to say "no" all the time, and make up some shit about supercomputer simulations demonstrating the violent implosion of our entire society. Eventually, politicians will learn to ignore them, just as they have every other kind of scientist, and we'll be hip deep in Hallochristaween celebrations the whole damn year round. At least it will be fewer trips to the seasonal stocking shelf in the warehouse.

Is what she said when I immediately reached for my phone and opened Tumblr instead of responding

But I feel in my bones that you are right. If this is to be my wife's moment of glory, I am willing to suffer notification overload, that the world may know she is funny. #MyFunnyWife

[Image description: digital drawing of Gwen Hartley and Boots from Second Star to the Left podcast. They are both facing away from the viewer, with Gwen kneeling on one knee while she points with her laser sword at a group of weird looking trees in front of them. Her space suit and leg prosthesis have small scratches and is slightly smudged with dirt. Boots - a spherical robot with wheels on each side and colored a pale yellow - also has some dirt and scratches, indicating that they been traveling for a while. They are surrounded by large blue green and yellow cabbage-like plants. The group of trees in front of them have very thick - almost egg-shaped - trunks topped with small clumps of purple-orange leaves. Their exposed roots raise them from the ground, almost as if they were walking. End description]

Why are you so happy??? Your nefarious scheme proceeds apace and it made you happy??? Cute as fuck

Oh wow the 250th Fourth of July parade has been cancelled lol

Also I get the sense that very few people in DC are aware that federal officials wrote detailed analyses warning of the air quality health risks of the enormous 850K fireworks set to go off — and that the admin did not release those findings to the public

A true story of something that happened to me at a con a few years ago! I just couldn't believe that bag saldjaldjalkd!!!

why can rockstar games institutionalise you for life like nikita kruschev for being autistic

Capitalism is disgusting.

Good morning ✨