Happy Pride š | The Golden Girls (1985-1992)

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@jessstiel
Happy Pride š | The Golden Girls (1985-1992)

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when youāre able to carry all the groceries in one trip
letter from a mother of a gay man. sent to ONE magazine, 1958.
--
This post was flagged as adult content and the original poster was deactivated so I'm bringing it back.
āMrs Rā was the pseudonym of Phyllis Shafer, a Kansas City local who helped found the Phoenix Society for Individual Freedom in 1966, a full three years before Stonewall. Throughout the 1960s and 1970s, she and her son Drew operated the Phoenix House, a safe haven for queer people in the city, and a hub of national queer activism. Drew passed away due to AIDS related complications in the 1980s, and his lover, Mickey Ray, spent the rest of his life fighting to keep his memory alive, largely contributing to the creation of the Gay and Lesbian Archive of Mid-America.
Years before the Stonewall uprising, Drew Shafer started Kansas City's first gay rights organization and published the first LGBTQ magazine
āWe tend to view American history as this constant march toward progress, which is total crap,ā he says. āYou gotta fight for that stuff. And if you don't fight for that, you can fall backward. Like it's not just this linear history."
Good quote from the article which may be relevant right now.
Bring this bad boy back with some delicious context for pride

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a reCAPTCHA will not request a sequence of keys, and what to do if you got scammed
This is actually the best intro to a porno that has ever existed
There is no way this is a porno
This is the best porno there has ever been.
The way he says āHEY WHAT THE FUCKā shaped me as a person
I hope today someone is in the lucky 10,000 and sees this for the first time.
do you guys remember when we googled something and we would get results that were actually related to the things we searched
Look into a udm14 extension for firefox and make it your default search. It returns google to what it was like back when that was the case. No AI. No ads or sponsored posts. Just a google search and answers.
POV: youāre watching the Supernatural finale

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Personally I hate AI because it uses slave labor, is killing the planet and is making people stupid, but that's just me. The soulless art aspect is just one little piece of my grander disdain.
wait how does AI use slave labor? Do you mean the human works that are stolen and not credited or compensated? Because technically under capitalism everything is exploited but there are varying degrees
Aside from the scraping, AI tech companies, including openAI/chatGPT, have outsourced training their models to countries in the global south, specifically Kenya in openAI's case. These workers are working in sweatshop conditions for less than 2 bucks USD per hour. I'm on mobile, but if you search 'openAI Kenya slave labor' and related keywords, you can find multiple articles about it.
Training AI takes a heavy toll on Kenyan workers, who say they earned $2 an hour to label and sift through gruesome content for American com
All due respect to Tumblr staff for listening and rolling back a feature that was obviously not what people wanted. Like, doing that is actually commendable.
"this post has only 20 notes" factoid actualy just statistical error. post has 10020 notes. Reblogs Georg, who reblogged the original post and got 10000 notes on their reblog, is not an outlier adn should absolutely be fucking counted
Reblogs in a chain now get their own notes
The reblog chain is one of the things that makes Tumblr unlike anywhere else. All the notes on reblogs are attributed to the original post, no matter which branch people actually liked or reblogged. We want to keep encouraging conversations, and give contributors the recognition they deserve.Ā
Soon, you'll be able to like, reblog, or reply to any part of a reblog chain, and that note will go to that reblog's author. Each reblog will have its own counts, instead of one aggregated number from every version of the post. And yes, youāll be able to like multiple posts in one chain.
If a reblog doesn't add anything, the love flows up to the last person in the chain who did. Your post doesn't lose notes just because people spread it quietly.
Past notes will stay on the original post ā we're only changing what happens from here on out. Retroactively re-attributing all of them would be... a lot.
This is just the beginning. More changes are coming as we keep building this out ā stay tuned!
Itās very clear that you all have strong feelings about Tumblr and about this change. We hear you. The passion people have for how Tumblr works is one of the things that makes this place special.
As this rolls out over the next few days and you explore it, weāll keep reading your replies and reblogs, so please keep sharing your questions, concerns, and ideas.
Your creativity has always been the heart of Tumblr, whether youāre the original poster or adding something brilliant in the reblogs,Ā and nothing about this change is meant to limit that.
If youād like to talk directly beyond the comments, leave a reply and weāll follow up with as many of you as we can. We want to work with you to make Tumblr better.
hey folks do we like this. reblog without commentary for reach
do we want this?
yes
no
There's a bunch of adhd advice out there that's like "people with adhd tend to work better under deadlines due to the anxiety so here are ways to artificially induce a stress response in order to get you to get work done" and it's like well what if I don't want to be stressed out all the time in order to function
this gold shouldn't stay in the comments
hey loves, Iāve been reading through the comments and loads of people are asking how to not fall into this pattern because thatās all they know. so, hereās some advice from Auntie Pan whoās been in the trenches (stress-caused disabilities and chronic illnesses).
context: grew up in an abusive, controlling home, escaped to uni, had a prolonged mental breakdown, became a teacher and worked in a dysfunctional school with amazing kids and nightmare management for years. I did not realise I have adhd and autism for a long time. (You might even be able to scroll back through this blog to find the time around which I did realise lol.)
ANYWAY, things that have helped me because my body can no longer handle any kind of stress without flaring up:
If youāre doing anything that requires you to do a lot of prep before you begin the actual thing (e.g. cooking, deep cleaning a room, moving house), mise en place. Thatās a fancy french way of saying get everything ready before you begin. So if Iām cooking idk spaghetti carbonara, that means fry and chop the bacon, separate the egg yolks from the whites, put water in the kettle, put dry spaghetti into a pan. Once everythingās ready, it reduces the mental load and means I can focus on the actual cooking and any clean up that I can do along the way. H/t to @ms-demeanor for this, you changed my life!
the Might As Well rule. This one works really well for me but you gotta be careful otherwise youāll get sucked into the Vortex. Basically, letās imagine youāre in the bathroom, brushing your teeth. You notice that the extra roll of toilet paper has been used. instead of thinking, āIāll get to that laterā, and then forgetting about it until you sit down on the bog (no judgement, weāve all been there), you think āMight As Well put an extra roll while Iām here!ā This tends to help with the little tasks that build up over time. This Does Not Work for big tasks.
Leading on from no.2, Do It Immediately/ASAP really helps me too. My current boss will email me on a Friday and say, ādonāt reply to this now! Leave it til monday!ā But she and i both know that if i leave it til monday, I will forget and get stressed and this will make me Very Ill. So, instead, the moment i receive the email, Iāll either schedule in replying to it as soon as Iām done with my current thing, OR Iāll reply to it immediately.
Anything that canāt be actioned immediately, i mark as Unread. Anything Unread in my inbox is a future action, and i check those Unread emails/texts/whatevers Every. Day. To make sure whether today is the day i have the info to action it. (This also means i have to stay on top of my inbox. I read all my emails and then mark them accordingly. Iām also brutal with unsubscribing)
The House Always Wins. Both in a literal sense, because i am in a constant battle with keeping my house clean, and i know now that Iāll never get it as clean as i want it. Itās impossible, i no longer have the energy or stamina to vacuum and scrub everything. But also just in a life sense. Iām never going to achieve things to perfection, and perfect is the opposite of done. And getting things done is that much more important when you have limited energy and strength. Accept that you often have to half-arse life in order to Full-Arse the few things that really matter to you.
Have multiples of everything, everywhere. I wear support gloves, so i need to have handcream at every sink and everywhere i sit down in the house. I try to keep it unobtrusive, but it means i donāt have to trek upstairs just to moisturise my hands. Gum, phone chargers, pens and pencils, water bottles, hand sanitizer, whatever you need.
Work with people, even if itās online. Body doubling actually works. Also Iāve found that if Iām working on assignments, taking myself to a library or study area that isnāt my bedroom helps so much.
Show off! Tell people on here or elsewhere in your life about the fact that youāve just written 100 words! Or that youāve cleaned the fridge and thatās a really big deal for you. Celebrate your wins, no matter how small.
Basically, youāre aiming to reduce the mental load as much as possible. Wear the same types of clothes all the time to minimise the amount of laundry. Eat the same three lunches so decision fatigue doesnāt take over.
All of this takes time to implement and it is cumulative, but i hope it helps. Reading the comments on this post, i finally understand why adhd is comorbid with so many other conditions. letās take care of each other <3
I'm so glad to hear that helped you!
For anybody looking for resources from someone dealing with actual ADHD, I have an incomplete but ever growing list of ADHD tips, tools, and suggestions on my website.
A lot of the pages on that site are adapted from my tumblr posts, for instance I'm adapting this post about car repair projects with ADHD into a guide on project management and completion with ADHD.
(Red links are stuff that I've got planned but haven't published for reasons that are probably clear to anyone looking for ADHD advice online)
Here are some additional ideas I personally find useful:
Working in an office:
I have a general list of the things I must get done each day and it does not change. It looks something like this:
- clock in
- log into required programs
- sort emails
- reply to texts
- etc.
This list is organized in order of priority in which I need to complete steps each day. Itās as general as possible so that I donāt have to modify it each day AND it stays short. I also start the list with a couple really easy steps that I must do each day so that I begin with a sense of accomplishment right out of the gate.
Even though I organized my list by general priority, sometimes the order I do the steps in changes to flex with my day AND my level of executive function. Sure, I should answer all my emails soon, but if I have 20 emails that may feel really daunting, so Iāll skip to another list item that may have a very small amount of work required that day. It doesnāt reduce the emails, but it feeds that sense of accomplishment & keeps me moving so I donāt lose momentum. The important thing is that Iām making progress & seeing work be completed.
I have also worked to cut as much duplicate communication from my life as possible. For example, if the most efficient way to communicate with my boss is by email, then I donāt want a text telling me to check my email, because then thatās an extra step and more things for me to monitor & reply to. Or if my coworker assigns me a task in our client management system & I am notified in the system, they donāt need to email me to let me know. The less steps I have to complete to do a task, the better.
Scheduling replies is a HUGE help, but even more important are TEMPLATES. Itās a lot quicker & less stressful to reply to an email when itās basically already written for you & all you need to do is add a name or date. Same with sending texts, letters, filing documents, etc.
I ensure my space is as comfortable & convenient as possible. I keep a fan, my phone charger, multiple pairs of headphones, chapstick, lotion, advil, snacks, etc all in my desk. If I have to sit here for several hours a day, I want to be as comfortable as possible so Iām not distracted from work by dry hands or a headache, etc.
Additionally, Iāve worked to schedule time into my week that is for ādo not disturbā time. This is time specifically set aside for me to work on tasks that require uninterrupted focus. Itās clearly communicated to my coworkers that they are not to disturb me during this time so that I can get work done. Sometimes I need silence, but often I prefer to put on music while I work (thus the multiple pairs of headphones) and Iāll blast upbeat music while I power through tasks.
At Home:
āSome is better than noneā is a really big one for me. Donāt have the energy to do all the dishes? How about just the big ones? Canāt clean my whole room? What if I just make my bed? Sometimes once Iām doing the task I find the motivation to do other tasks, but even if I donāt, at least that little bit is done.
Multi-tasking on things is also a big one, especially if I can pair a fun activity with a boring one. I listen to podcasts while I do dishes, watch tv while I fold laundry, etc.
I also find that if I have any motivation at all to do a task, I need to do it right now. Am I watching a show where the characters are doing laundry & now Iām thinking about doing laundry? Ok, then I need to get up & go do laundry RIGHT NOW. Donāt wait, just act. Maximize that motivation.
Also, I refuse to guilt myself for hacking my life. I find the sticking point for a task & try to find a way to resolve it so Iām more likely to do the task. I want to cook more but I hate dishes? What can I do to reduce the dishes? How about one pot meals? Or hey, what about using disposable pans or paper plates? It might not be the most environmentally friendly long term, but it saves me from eating out every night.
Or I hate sleeping on ādirtyā sheets but I donāt have the energy to do a whole wash cycle every weekend, so I keep multiple sets of sheets. As soon as one sheet comes off, I put a clean one on. This way, even if the dirty sheet doesnāt get washed today, I can still sleep in a clean bed tonight.
I find āreasonsā to do chores that will motivate me without making me feel overwhelmed. Iāll invite over a friend that I know wonāt judge the mess. This motivates me to clean without feeling overwhelmed about needing things to be perfect.
Finally, if at all possible, I outsource the work. For some people this may look like hiring a service, but a lot of us canāt afford that option. Instead, my friends & I trade off. We help each other with large home projects & swap dinners at each others homes & watch each others kids while the others do housework, etc. Community is KEY.

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affirmations for when you have to send emails