i know everyone loves baby seals, but sometimes i really am blown away by their whimsy. they took a teddy bear and made it a mermaid. i feel very wonderful knowing we live on the same planet as puppy mermaid teddies
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@happyminyards
i know everyone loves baby seals, but sometimes i really am blown away by their whimsy. they took a teddy bear and made it a mermaid. i feel very wonderful knowing we live on the same planet as puppy mermaid teddies
Official joy and whimsy post

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At the local hamburger shop and they said yelled out “order 167!” And three middle school age kids yelled in perfect unison “ 6 7!” Life is sometimes so beautiful
If you reference 67 you deserve to be executed on the spot tbh
If I was king for a day the first thing I would do would be to sentence you to a life full of love and understanding.
Joy and whimsy detected! This response is joyful and whimsical!
how the hell do i talk to people
Stand in front of them and press A
Shane would drop gloves with Dillon if he plays the way he played with Ilya in TLG. Sending him down to Belleville is for his own physical safety

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I know in my heart of hearts that they will not keep the butt plug adventure in season two but I can't help but imagine a tasteful shot of the plug on the floor a'la the strap in Sense8 episode one. Plug in the foreground delicately glinting with lube. Shot cheated upward so you can see the over-the-sofa railing happening in the background with Ilya's back framed by Shane's legs. I think that could work. Crave TV hire me.
the whole "lipstick on a pig" thing makes no sense because the second we gave a pig access to makeup she became god's cuntiest soldier
this line delivery has lived in my head for 10 years
Just One Guy, Just One Spider-Man… -OR Woman?!? We don’t Know; ….forsure.
remember to bury the dead with a phone, everyone. these days the ferry terminal at the river styx wants you to download a fucking app
@trans-seraphim

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I do think it's kind of funny how john green wrote a book about tuberculosis that brought a lot of renewed attention to the subject and he's since become the darling of the tb world, speaks at tb conferences, my dad and every other tb researcher I know is absolutely smitten with him, and they'll be like "we love this guy! have you heard of him??" and I have to be like well yes, I have. for other reasons
The thing about Shane is that the WOULD NOT kill himself. Ilya always kinda has it in the back of his mind. He's been passively suicidal since he was a preteen and, forgive me for saying so, pretty actively suicidal at several points as well. Ilya Rozanov does not expect or really even WANT to make it to thirty. Ilya lives his life under the assumption that he will someday wrap his car around a tree or catch a skate wrong and bleed out on national television or maybe, honestly, just go missing. Take himself out somewhere like a sick dog and nobody will care enough to find him (they will) or at the very least the tragedy of his early demise will be overshadowed by the relief felt when everyone realizes that They Don't Have To Deal With Him Anymore (He is wrong)
So that's the tragedy of Ilya Rozanov. The tragedy of Shane Hollander is that he will give completely up and then just keep going. Failure is not an option and he needs to keep performing at the highest level possible for as long as possible but everything else will be gone. Any sort of light or warmth extinguished. Deprivation will become its own reward. He will become so scared of his own wants that he starts actively avoiding things that bring him even some modicum of pleasure--and yes, this would be self harm. He starts to associate the pain of longing with success. Family is his only reprieve, and even then he rations it out. He holds all of his ache and his longing and his need in a fist in his chest and sometimes when his mom hugs him too tight or his dad rubs his shoulders it starts to dislodge and that's dangerous. He can't let himself have that.
Shane would not be Scott Hunter, hooking up with men in Europe on the down-low every summer just to fill that gaping maw of absent affection and connection in some small way. He would not be Ilya Rozanov, making bad decision after bad decision and waiting for one of them to catch up with him in a way that finally shoves him off the coil, one way or another. He would ignore and deprive the soft animal of his body until it became something dark and cold and barren and he would feel accomplished when it finally stopped whimpering and just laid down to die. And then he would keep going.
At any moment when I see a funny post about Ilya or Shane that I disagree with character-wise I immediately think of that one post that's like "I understand character analysis and stuff, sometimes I just like to make jokes" and honestly I owe that person my life. It's so true. And me too. Sometimes I write 1k long meta and sometimes I just like to make jokes.
Ilya drunk off his ass one night begs Svetlana to give him a stick and poke tattoo of #24 on his hip. When she asks why he would want his rivals number on his skin forever he just slurs something about remembering his enemy always.
Ilya’s favorite place to be.
I think about this parallel more than I should. First time, and First time after saying I love you. ❤️

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we are esteemed scholars in the fields of ilyarchaeology and shanthropology
hollanov at their kid’s autism assesment and the doctor says that autism can be genetic and asks if anyone in the family has autism and shane says no at the same time as ilya says yes
ilya when shane answers no: