needs more pining

I AGREE IT SHOULD BE SHANE. shane hollander most infamous gay hockey player in canada, and what did he do it for? ilya fucking ran. didn't think this thing was worth working for. he's on the wrong side of 30 and his knee fucking hurts all the time and he's always known before what comes next.

(ilya used to say it would be the two of them, as long as they could skate.)

anyway shane in a fit of self-destruction picking up someone when the team plays in la because getting fucked has always taken him out of his head before. ilya's not the only guy in the world. he doesn't need--

LMAO i love that everyone is like THE SWISS BOYS ARE BEING TOO PERFUNCTORY ABOUT THE SIMULATED FUCKING. here's the thing though, there's something narratively interesting about that... in my mind i'm creating a winner's room...

okay imagine shane & ilya pitted against each other from the start, trading who the forfeit is back and forth every time they play each other, and it's been like handjobs & blowjobs their whole rookie year but ilya is On A Mission the whole time (getting hollander to ask to be fucked in the ass), a multiyear journey that culminates in a frankly too sweet for a winner's room anal. and THEN before shane can process any of this he gets ghosted.

scream TO BE FAIR. i haven't read the long game but i imagine the problems are more than just geographical? such as:

82-game schedule is horrific, their road trips aren't always gonna line up, they DON'T actually have a ton of time together and it sucks!!! they spent so long clawing out time for each other and it feels like things should have changed now they've figured things out but they're still fighting for scant hours out of weeks

ilya moved away from his social support system & in ottawa he can't fucking talk to his teammates without lying to them. so why'd you come to ottawa, roz? you doing anything tonight, my wife and i would love to have you for dinner. like shane was always a part of ilya but in ottawa he's almost all of it, so ilya (a hugely social animal) has to stay unknowable!!!

the hockey is the sex but now it's bad hockey? obviously shane doesn't only love ilya when he's winning cups, but this is such an interesting stress to put on a relationship which was built on competing with the only other person who can keep up with you (who can understand you!!!). does ilya think he's still lovable when he's not able to succeed? does shane feel guilty for putting ilya into this position? presumably they are not having frank & honest conversations about this because they are, unfortunately, hockey players

but also the sex is the sex. wait can i say something. if ilya loves being in control during sex because it contrasts so starkly with how he doesn't have control outside of sex then the sex has to be SPECTACULARLY intense while ottawa keeps losing games. sorry i just imagined it and blacked out.