one of the little gay people in your phone

everyone is entitled to having Some Weird Guy. if they so choose

you will have to pry my Weird Guy from my cold dead hands. he is mine & he has charmed me.

Fuck amatonormativity. Be your own dead wife

Context for anyone who is wondering: Lamine Yamal's parents won an UNICEF raffle for a charity photoshoot in which Barça players posed with kids, and 5 month old Lamine happened to get 20yo Messi. Which is like. Literally insane

The children's show villain is a figure who sadly is not seen outside the children's show. There are few stock characters who as succinctly declare, from sheer stage presence, "the world is unloveable and it is painful to live here; that which delights mankind is like ash on my tongue" without being too fucking whiny about it.

one of the best parts of making up increasingly wild and specific aus with a friend is sending them posts like "this is sooo blorbo in torture chamber au number 15" and they reply back like "YESSS btw have i told you about my latest idea for how to torture them even more" and you get to enjoy a little snack and kick your feet with glee

since "cage" is a last name and there are girls named "chastity" it would be theoretically be possible for a girl to be named chastity cage

Wake up babe new Austin Powers girl just dropped

I don't know if this is still a thing but they used to go so far as to make the flooring material in big stores in shopping centres slightly softer than the floors outside the store, so that customers would stay inside a bit longer since people have (largely subconscious) preferences about floor textures based on how easy they are to walk on and how much they hurt tired feet. The amount of research that goes into choosing the lighting in makeup and clothing stores is bonkers. Bakeries often smell a lot more like fresh bread or donuts than their actual baking activities would create -- they pipe the smell out front on purpose. Grocery stores are deliberately laid out to be very slightly confusing -- not confusing enough to impede buying, but confusing enough to send people down a few wrong aisles to look at products that they wouldn't otherwise see. Signs are often placed in aisles so that you have to go into the aisle a bit to read them clearly, or at least take a good look down it.

y'know i don't really love how people use "butch" interchangeably with "handy"

*north american approaching lesbian couple* so which one of you is useful and which one of you is the woman