Too Lazy to segregate!

when i was a kid i was so mad all the time bc i thought someday i'd have to be somebody's wife i didn't know it was optional. is everybody reminding the young girls in their lives that it's optional.

as an optimist i dream of a beautiful world where people are fucking normal about aromanticism

At first I read “as an optometrist” and was just ready to accept the statement as is like oh yeah maybe some kind of pun about if people’s views weren’t clouded by hatred and biases they could be normal about aro and aspec in general but then I reread it was like “sigh, time for my nearsighted ass to go back to the optometrist.”

misread aromanticism as astigmatism

some of you need to get new aspecs

Want do you call a ghost that isn't cis?

A phantransm

I cannot BELIEVE I didn't say "trantasm"

Isn't that why you're on Tumblr?

MY OWN GIRLFRIEND-

Has anyone said transparent yet?

ENOUGH ENOUGH IM ALREADY DEAD

So ... (⁠・⁠_⁠・⁠;⁠) ... What do we call your ghost?

If you think I'm hanging around after this you're mistaken

Planning to trans-scend the mortal plane?

i love it so much every time i see it

“ugh stupid gravity” 

IM FUXKING CSHAKING

I haven’t seen this post on my dash in *years* bless this

Bless, this is absolutely amazing

I love this. It’s so gestural and he’s so exasperated about gravity.

The perfect comedic timing of the NASA logo.

did you hear?? they FIRED the fox.

not from her job. in a KILN

oh my gods she's gorgeous

*breathes deep breath* *slams reblog button*

why is this the funniest thing I've seen all day?

i bring a "technically i could do this tomorrow" energy to things that tomorrow me really resents

In an effort to avoid supporting megacorporations, I shall now be posing questions directly to tumblr that I would otherwise have googled.

If Mayonnaise is just eggs and oil, why it creamy?

Because it's also evil

Yup! It’s anything that takes up space, has mass, and is goth.

You meet god

Whole, in one gulp.

Father of the Muffin Boy

Car's haunted

Slam into a priest in a crosswalk going at least forty miles an hour

into the sky, where it turns into stars

priest has to pay for medical bills related to haunted car crashing into him

....Ah

doesn't it piss you off that you have to find something to eat every single day. every one of them. just every day. you gotta eat something

i do not ghost purposely i just have no idea what to say ever

and i have no concept of passage of time

i do not ghost purposely i just have no idea what to say ever

and i have no concept of passage of time

we should talk about water more often that shit is crazy

it is literally one of the most normal things

you can’t even begin to understand how insane water is

water is extremely difficult to compress and would prefer almost anything else including exploding to being squeezed real hard

Water is the bully of the molecular world. It dissolves fucking everything. That's because not only is it polar, it's also very small, so most polar substances can be infiltrated and broken up by water molecules.