I need your help figuring out if I'm on the aro spectrum or not 😭😭 okay so while I do enjoy consuming content about romance, I personally don't see myself participating in that kind of stuff, it's just not for me i fear 💔💔
I've never really felt romantic attraction towards anyone before and I used to have "crushes" just to fit in with everyone else
I suppose it would be okay if I experienced MY version of romance (I don't really know how to explain it but it's pretty different from the usual sappy romance) but then again I don't think I'll find someone like that so that's off the list
my main issue is that I might be a "late bloomer" and think I'm on the spectrum (which is why I require the goats help to figure it out)
as i am always saying. you guys are incredibly silly because you're always sending me the most aromantic asks imaginable and asking if you're aromantic. by textbook definition yes!! pinky promise!! not experiencing romantic attraction and faking crushes to fit in is so incredibly aro experience.
as to being a late bloomer: first of all, there are a lot of autistic aro people. it seems to be a pretty common phenomenon! from what i've heard, a fair amount of people seem to link their aromanticism with the way that they experience emotion different from neurotypical people. and that differing from the norm is what it's all about. + i'll tell you what i say about trauma-informed labels, too: if you're aro because you're autistic, that's fine! you're allowed. sometimes we have things going on with us that make us experience things in a different way. labels aren't like eye colors. you aren't born with one thing in particular that falls into a specific category. we're all using words to express things about our experiences and we use the ones that we find fit the best :) it's all social constructs in the end (/neutral). you just get to pick the one that you want to use to express yourself.
second of all, if you are a late bloomer, that's fine. the aro police aren't going to come get you if you were wrong about being aromantic. you're allowed to be mistaken about a label. and! you're allowed to have your experience change, too! nothing wrong with saying that you identified as aro for a while and then felt like a different label fit better. personally i know i'm happy to have anyone be part of the community as long as they'd like, and i'll always be glad that they had a space to go to when they needed it. you're allowed to be wrong, you're allowed to change, you're allowed to follow what you think is going on with you at any moment in time.
i'll also say: the late bloomer thing is a possibility, but i also think that people put a lot more emphasis on it than is deserved. sure, people grow into things. but a lot of people... don't. i started identifying as aro in middle school and i got that shit correct the first time cause i knew what i was about.
i also wonder how many people were "late bloomers" because they hit a point in their life where they felt pressured by others to finally perform some societal expectation and went out and forced themselves to do it. how many late bloomers actually bloomed late and how many were already flowers trying to look like other flowers, y'know?
all that to say that if you are a "late bloomer," that's fine. if you're neurodivergent, that's fine. if you don't think that you're exactly in the strict definition of aromanticism but you identify with it and want to use the term, that's fine. what's important is that you do what makes you happy and remember the eternal maxim:
