Something Smart. Also Intelligent. Probably. Maybe

#2: "hi [professor], hope you're doing well! unfortunately, I'm [sick/stuck at work/dead] and won't be able to submit [assignment] by [due date]. could I please have an extension? if not, is there anything else I could do to make up this credit? thanks so much, [op]"

The FIRST SENTENCE is the thing you want the recipient to do. Do not make them guess.

I want to let you know about ... (This email is to inform someone of something not to ask them to do anything)

Could you please do ... (This is a request. You want them to do something).

I'm looking into x and wondering if you can help me (this is also a request but for information instead of an action).

People do not want to read an email and even if they do read it, most people are skimming and not interested. Tell them what you want first, then provide context or other information (when you need a thing is often key). If the email is informational, you can even add "you don't need to do anything, this is just to keep you informed!" People will appreciate not having to figure out what you want from them.

If you can't articulate what you want the recipient to do with the message, you are not ready to email them. I read too many emails where I have no idea what the person wants from me.

Julaves day 1, Chasmosaurus belli. Now in tiny animated form!

18 years. this is enough time for the work to grow to adulthood and begin to care for itself

now you may be asking yourself, tumblr user cenneidi, how would we implement such a thing given the uncertainties and vagaries of fate? and to that I say: I don't know. i'm not the answers guy, i'm the ideas guy. However, here are some ideas for possible implementation:

copyright oracles to predict the exact date, time, and circumstances of each author's death. this one is cool because when you first publish a work you get to find out how long you have left as a fun little treat!

author must submit a planned departure date alongside any copyright challenge. this is good because it encourages artists to kill themselves, a favorite goal of many on this website

cis people take for granted that the point of view character in their fantasies (generally themselves) is of the sexgender that is comfortable and erotic for them to inhabit. who you find attractive is only half of your sexuality -- the other half is who you feel attractive being

Don't threaten to do it, go research it, and actually give it a go!!! Most of the books for old crafts are out of copyright. Even if you don't get a job at whatever you try, or hell, even of you don't become in any way good at it, just learning and trying something new is good for you, and it gives you a greater understanding and appreciation for things.

(Our brains are so good at categorising experiences, that normally, as soon as we experience something, it’s absorbed, and no longer surprising; how delightful to find that we can be surprised by animals again!)

But it also helps you to pick out what’s REALLY inherent to the animal, what pieces of gesture and motion (obscured by colour, pattern or our own familiarity) are actually integral to the understanding of the true Beast….