vent @dogteethboy - Tumblr Blog

man, this whole quarantine shit made me realize i really have 0 future huh? was about to start a new job to go to college next semester but that's over with since i cant work :l

#vent #all my friends are either going to leave or be stuck here with me since they cant afford to live on their own #so shit sucks #im just over here wanting to die for possibly ruining my friends futures as well and also being stuck here for at least another year with #my family who ignores me every day #with my only reprieve being playing *fucking minecraft* with my friends online #im just done #tw suicidal thoughts #tw suicidal #tw panic attack #tw pandemic #please do not rb

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if they don't need me why am i still here

#my thoughts during my most recent anxiety attack #repetitive #repeating text cw #anxiety attack #actuallyabused #actuallytraumatized #negative #negative cw #personal

trying to help my friends who are varying degrees of depressed + suicidal while *also* being a varying degree of depressed + suicidal is a fucking train wreck honestly

#vent #tw suicidal #depression #tw depression #mine

catscafecomics

It all begins with yourself…

#positivity #self love #self care #rb

dogteethboy

my new counselor, who i was finally gonna open up ab my abuse to, after only one 45 minute session with me: i don't believe you've been sexually abused

me, a csa and cocsa survivor: you're right :)

dogteethboy

*same* counselor: don't you think your (transphobic) dad has a right to know that you're trans

honestly, one of the worst counselors i ever visited. i had to fill out a questionnaire and finally has the courage to put he/him and then he called me she/her and ma'am for 3/5 sessions until our fourth one where he finally looked at the questionnaire and then spent the *entire* session just talking about how he was *inclusive* because he had *gone to work shops* and then he made me explain trans issues to him for our full session and then the next session said that. mind you, i went in for anxiety and depression issues. glad i dont see him any more, since my college only has 5 free sessions.

#abuse vent #trauma vent #cocsa #cw cocsa #trauma survivor #csa #cw csa #tw rape mention #actuallytraumatized #actuallyabused #mine #invalidation #shitty counselors #okay to rb

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my new counselor, who i was finally gonna open up ab my abuse to, after only one 45 minute session with me: i don't believe you've been sexually abused

me, a csa and cocsa survivor: you're right :)

#abuse vent #trauma vent #trauma survivor #cocsa #cw cocsa #csa #cw csa #tw rape mention #actuallytraumatized #actuallyabused #mine #invalidation #okay to rb

incons0lable

#vent #depression #actuallytraumatized #actuallyabused #rb

euo

I think I am a better ghost than I am a human being From the movie “Ansiktet” by Ingmar Bergman (1958) Mikko Kourinki

#dissociation #actuallytraumatized #actuallyabused #rb

i want to feel like i’m worth something to somebody

#negative #okay to rb #actuallyabused #actuallytraumatized #mine

nothing feels real. i go through life like a robot

#okay to rb #vent #dissociation #disociation #depersonalisation tw #derealisation tw #depersonalization #derealisation #csa implied #cocsa implied #actuallytraumatized #actuallyabused

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parents should never force their children to go on a diet. tw for restricted eating, abuse by a mom, and emetophobia under cut:

my mother used to force me to go on a diet while i was at her house called a “modified military diet” for a month and a half. i was so sick and literally starving, but it was “okay” because i was losing around 30 pounds in a month and a half.

diet lasted three days, off days was required to exercise and eat under 1,000 calories, all while being under sixteen years old.

i still gag and almost throw up when i even smell grape fruit.

#mom mention #child abuse #forced dieting #tw restricted eating #emetophobia #vent #abuse vent #can reblog #actuallytraumatized #actuallyabused

xinrest

i wish you had broken me completely

so i would not have to live on

with you in my mind

#cocsa #cocsa survivor #csa #csa survivor #trauma vent #vent #trauma survivor #actuallytraumatized #actuallyabused #cw csa implied #cw cocsa implied #rb

i feel like less of a person and more of a patch-work amalgamation of trauma

#vent #actuallytraumatized #actuallyabused #tw csa implied #tw cocsa implied #can rb #my post #csa #cocsa #csa vent #cocsa vent

fossickly

people who live with their abusers are braver than any US marine

if ur still living with the people who traumatized u and u can't recover please know i love you and you're not alone.

i still depend on my abusers, and it fucking hurts. one day we'll put our plans to escape into action. one day we won't suffer at their hands anymore. 💫

#actuallytraumatized #actuallyabused #abuser mention #rb

you ruined so much for me. so many memories, so many movies, so many things that should have been happy were *ruined* by you. and you don’t even seem to remember.

#csa #cocsa #tw csa implied #tw cocsa implied #vent #actuallytraumatized #can rb

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survivor-positivity

i hope 2020 treats everyone well but it's important to remember not to put too much pressure on a change of year to fix everything- take recovery at your own pace, no matter the time of year

#positivity #actuallytraumatized #recovery #rb

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