Dibbersify

I was debating pre- and post- smartphone existentialism with an older gentleman today and he stopped part way through and said “Why are you a security guard? Why aren’t you teaching this at some college somewhere?” And I didn’t know what to say so I went with “Well I used to make art but nobody pays an artist”

I want to invoke thought and wonder and introspection and encourage the passions of every soul I meet forever and ever and dig until I find the glorious potential for creation and experience and joy in every single one but unfortunately I must pay rent and so I stand, a meat shield, an NPC with unlockable dialogue

#capitalism brain tells you that anyone interesting must fight to the top of their interest#and precludes the possibility of everyone everyone everyone already being interesting

they should make recliners that recline even if you are small

recliners that don't tip backwards when you are large would also be appreciated

I propose an alliance against a common enemy

thanks so much! I’ll just whip on over to the friendly neighborhood small people furniture store now that I know the only problem is my ignorance of physics.

You're being sarcastic, but I used to sell furniture and you would not believe how many people did not understand this very thing. Then they're trying to replace a chair with another chair that is going to exactly the same thing because they don't know what the real problem is. Now you know! Different issue if you can't afford to replace the chair right now, but most furniture stores should have plenty of different sizes.

this is about Every Chair And Public Access it literally is not that hard to give a chair people will be sitting on a locking mechanism so that anyone can use it without doing a Goldilocks routine at the movie theatre or the dr’s office Jesus Christ

I'm currently in the process of doubling all matter. I'm not sure where it'll go like if everything just gets twice as dense or if there would become two of everything or whatever. I don't really know

going to the corner store to get more corners

i have been informed by literally every french speaker on earth that “une pipe” is slang for blowjob

sorry I think it sucks that basic furniture is frequently just fully not usable if you are above or below a certain weight or height and being like “being able to sit in a chair is your financial responsibility” is just. so condescending lmfao. we invented the ability to lock a backrest in position and it sucks that that’s not standard.

am i allowed to say kill all trillionaires or is that too specific of a threat

dolphins I think would really really enjoy having hands if they had them because they already like to touch and carry and hit things, but I also think it's probably for the best that they don't because I think they would also dismantle and steal a lot of things that they shouldn't. sea raccoons.

@raccoonmilf I don't trust my raccoon facts from anyone but you

This fact is true

no one is normal about pitbulls it’s either “oh they’re nanny dogs” or “they have the Riverdale serial killer gene” you’re all stupid 😭

This has been said a thousand times before but the "kink contributes to rape culture" thing is so transparently #stupid especially when you take into account like. Our whole explicitly communicated systems of ensuring consent thing. Meanwhile the whole idea of Normative Sexuality is kind of inherently coercive on some level innit

I have real thoughts about this but I'm too brainfoggy to articulate them further rn so you're getting a joke instead: I'm gonna start telling people you can't consent to vanilla sex under patriarchy

The idea that there is a particular way you're *supposed* to be touched and like it sounds pretty bad when you put it like that doesn't it? I've had to thoroughly deprogram myself from cishetero normative ideas about what sex even *is* in order to feel remotely normal about my body & sexuality. Talking to more trans/lesbian/ace/kinky people (in any combination of the four) teaches you you're allowed to say no, to anything, for any reason. But carefully negotiated pre-planned theater riffing on real world power structures for fun is scary so it must be the deviant perverts that are the problem and not, like, normal men in real life

& the thing about people practicing kink unsafely/under-negotiated is that it *does* happen but in the kink community these people are universally regarded as Doing It Wrong. And that type of behavior is still running straight people software (i.e. it's usually misogyny) & this violation of boundaries via assuming they can do whatever they want to someone else's body would still be just as bad if it was vanilla, actually ! Do you know how many people have problems with painful penetration and just go along with it anyway cause they feel like they have to ??????? God

I don't like complaining but it's too warm outside and I'm covered in bug bites and my dicks fallin off :(

every time you make art of any kind, a stat that is not visible to the player goes up. also, this is the most important stat in the game

does singing in the shower count as art

does a strong as fuck ice mummy have ice powers