Worldwide eternal Frankenstein living death slavery

You wake up one day with the ability to freeze time at will for as long as you want with no repercussions. What’s the first thing you do with your newfound powers?

take a nap

you just woke up

take a nap

Finally take care of those fucking Joestars for good

Going to the UN to present my “Bro it’s right there come on’ proposal, which would see the Falkland islands given to Argentina, Cuba to the US, New Zealand to Australia, and Taiwan to China. It will also unify Borneo and give gilbalter back to Spain

Hate to be That Guy but New Zealand is a good ways away from Australia, it just looks close `cause there's nothing else around NZ but water. If Australia's gonna get something that's Right There it should be New Guinea

tubi is one of our greatest warriors in the fight against streaming services costing a fortune for mediocre content. tubi has the most insane collection of movies you will ever encounter all for free. it has cult classics and questionable lifetime movies and movies that nobody except like three people on the planet have ever seen. tubi has movies that doesn’t exist. like if you just thought of a movie one day but never made it and no one ever made it it would somehow still exist on tubi. one day i will log onto tubitv dot com and i will see terribly inappropriate, overly complex, and strange on there. and i won’t even be surprised.

wait this wasn’t a “poob has it for you” bit?

tubi doesnt have what youre looking for but it does have a lot of things you would never have thought to

he failed the physiognomy check

just saw a "only one bed" fic with the major character death warning

#i guess that's one way to solve that problem

“This bed ain’t big enough for the both of us.”

People talk about "orange" a lot, but I think it's weirder that no English word rhymes with "pint"

What about "COREALFFNIBUGS"? That rhymes with both of those

It always makes me a bit frustrated when (usually well-meaning) Christians act like it's a moral failing to remain unmarried. Christendom was built by droves of men and women who took vows of celibacy, just as much as by those who had children.

Every so often the topic comes up where someone wants to know what is my strategy for the nuclear apocalypse. I will tell you. My strategy is to be one of the 50+ percent of humanity that dies within the first minute. I ain't deal with all that

Whatttt is with the tendency of Tumblr users to seek absolution from every single person who offhandedly posts about disagreeing with something they do

I say this not unkindly, but firmly: to function as a member of a social species, you have to get comfortable with the idea that not everyone will like you

Unfortunately managers in customer service jobs and people in HR departments never got this memo and they hold the power to fire incredible numbers of people

Whatttt is with the tendency of Tumblr users to seek absolution from every single person who offhandedly posts about disagreeing with something they do

I say this not unkindly, but firmly: to function as a member of a social species, you have to get comfortable with the idea that not everyone will like you