Another Star Trek Shitpost Alt

Pride month you guys!

Janeway: can’t mess with the timeline, the time cops already hate me

Admiral Janeway: 22 crew members will die

Janeway: sad but every crew loses people

Admiral Janeway: your best friend Tuvok will slowly and horribly lose his sanity

Janeway: the doctor will figure something out

Admiral Janeway: Chakotay and Seven get married

Janeway: …what

Admiral Janeway: they’re secretly dating right now

The lizard assassin is fucking the twink doctor, and the twink Doctor is fucking that cool Irish dude who supports unions (based). The twink Doctor is ALSO fucking an android but that’s the other show

The union man is married a schoolteacher (based) who is helping their wife’s planet ecologically recover from a fascist occupation, because she’s awesome

Their wife is an anti fascist freedom fighter (based) and the biggest lesbian you’ve ever seen. The union guy is like, an exception. And so is her goo boyfriend. Goo boyfriend might enemies to lovers-ing the local bar owner. AND she’s dating two different women hosting the same worm (bad news about the tall one) and they’re both madly in love with their wife from a previous lifetime. The tall one I s also fucking that dude with the funky sword and two dicks. They’re married, actually.

The short worm girl and the terrorist (based) are both dating this girl who works slot machines who helps her husband start a union (based). She and her husband later become the leaders of an entire government and pass pro worker and feminist reforms (based)

The terrorist (based) also has a complicated toxic yuri situationship with her kinky evil dominatrix alternate universe self who is a dictator (god forbid women have hobbies)

In the alternate universe the short worm girl is a goth and married to the slot machines girl who’s a freedom fighter. The tall worm girl is in a throuple with the twink Doctor but he’s not a doctor he’s an asshole and the captain who in the main universe is everybody’s dad.

He is the best dad in the multiverse and cooks a mean jumbalaya. This is vital information

He has a cool space trucker wife and a son who’s a writer and best friends with the son of the alien labor union spouses. Dad might be doing an enemies to lovers thing with this theater kid who betrayed him

There’s also this creepy lizard nazi who comes by every once in a while to pester them. He’s the worst.

I don’t know how this appeared on my screen part 2

QUESTION: One thing I was wondering is why, is the reason why Garak is so friendly with Bashir–

ANDY ROBINSON: Did you hear the way she said “friendly” with Bashir?

QUESTION CONTINUES: …was because he might be attracted to him?