Darkside Goody Two Shoes

I think it'd be really funny if Eric was actually a younger brother. So, like, maybe he's a duke, actually, but he still gets the title of Prince. Travels the sea a lot, unlike a more landlocked heir. Hanging out at this summer seaside palace while the rest of the family is elsewhere for some reason.

add to it that ilya loves resting his head in peoples laps, getting his hair played with.. and has an oral fixation

so what i am saying is that ilya loves, loves, LOVES! cockwarming shane - sometimes they just chill on the couch, watching a renovation show or a movie ilya isn’t particularly interested in so while he rests his head in shane’s lap he simply turns around, tugs shane’s sweats down and puts shane’s cock in his mouth

they stay like that for a long time, ilya gets all floaty and sleepy bc shane’s hand is stroking through his hair, lightly scratching at his scalp and his cock is in his mouth

Like he’s just cum, his brain is soup, the beast of heteronormativity is breathing down his neck, and he says,

‘I can’t. I can’t do this.’

and Ilya just replies

‘The light fixtures in the kitchen were imported from a designer in Spain.’

….

….

‘What?’

and now he’s so confused he can’t possibly leave.

Louis sees Lestat as this primal force of nature who looks like a romance novel hero, can effortlessly control any room, is "preternaturally charming," impeccably turned out, no one can say no to him for long.

but we get in LESTAT'S head, and suddenly he has scars and a tangled mane of hair, people are constantly talking over him, he sweats, he's getting beat up and his clothes are getting destroyed in a non-sexy way, he's flailing around wildly with NO idea what he's doing, people (lestat included) think he's untalented and annoying.

And LOUIS, well. Louis clearly sees himself as uncanny, reserved, compelling but a little off-putting. He is other: cut-off from humanity, holding his emotions and relationships at arm's length.

1. did you eat the baby?

2. are you schizophrenic, louis?

3. and then what?

4. fuck, man, are you the zodiac killer?

site, August 1 is the first

day of Halloween.

Gerard Way witnesses 9/11 and as a consequence, starts My Chemical Romance

Stephanie Meyer sees My Chemical Romance and becomes inspired to write Twilight

Somewhere in Rio de Janeiro, a man by the name of Felipe Neto is so outraged by the Twilight movies that he makes a hate video about them that goes so viral he becomes one of Brazil's biggest YouTubers

His brother Luccas Neto rides off his fame and becomes a children's YouTuber

Across the Atlantic, Portuguese children become obsessed with his videos. Like the lusophone Jake Paul

Portuguese children watch his videos so fucking much that they begin talking like they're from Rio

Portuguese parents are horrified by the Brazilian Portuguese but can't make it stop

I was trained in the dark arts of the cover letter by my mother, who is a hiring manager. And her training has paid off: I've been consistently told my cover letters are excellent. Let me pass on the wisdom.

The job of a cover letter is to give a prospective employer strictly more information than is on the resume. This is where you take the resume contents and put them into context. You look at the job requirements (you are looking at the job requirements before applying, right?) and look at your resume and ask the question (in your head) "why would a person think this candidate would be good for this job?" and your cover letter is the answer to that question. If you don't answer that question, the hiring manager is going to have to do it themselves, and you have way more information to work with than they do.

This is especially important if you're moving from one industry to another, because then the relevant connections aren't obvious. It's also very important if you're overqualified, because then you can use the letter to say "I know it looks like this job would be too entry-level for me, but I'm interested to pursue it for reasons x, y, and z". You can also use this space to explain away something that might otherwise be disqualifying, like job-hopping or a long break in employment. The tone to strike here is always matter-of-fact and constrained to topic - don't go into detail about health stuff or personal tragedy, just tell them what they need to hear: that this period of your resume was affected by [bad thing] but that it's now in the past and you're looking forward to the next chapter. Remember, one of the things they're trying to learn is whether you'd be content in this role, or whether you'd be miserable and leave after 2 months, which would force them to do all the work of hiring again. You're trying to establish that you will fit right in and not cause problems. Knowing what drew you to this job in particular (and don't just say 'money', that's true for everyone) helps with that.

yall we did it

not because he's a baby a la classic man cold

but because he will AGGRESSIVELY try to pretend he is not sick

he is trying to gaslight others but ALSO himself

he has a gold medal immune system thank you he did NOT get taken down by ill pikeling spreading Elementary School Plague to him

not happening

as an itty bitty he lied so he wouldn't have to skip hockey, and that has NOT changed as an adult

his true toxic trait is that he WILL be typhoid mary in that locker room if it means he doesn't have to stay home and miss playing

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And it pissed me off so badly that I spent the ENTIRE WORK DAY today compiling evidence from every project my team has ever done for her, pulling past emails she’d sent us, putting together an entire case proving that she had been the problem all along. That she got projects mixed up, that she’d made requests that were nonsensical, literally everything you could possibly imagine. Screenshots of emails, reports we’d submitted, EVERYTHING.

This woman in particular has been terrorizing my team for years, her name is almost a slur in my office, I had simply had ENOUGH of her.

I put all of this evidence together and sent it to all of my bosses at 4:30pm. Then I took a long break to eat a sweet treat and drink some tea.

After my break, my bosses all called in an emergency meeting with me and they said they read my report and fucking loved it. And I sat on a teams call with my boss’ boss as she wrote my nemesis the scathing email I had always fantasized about sending, using the evidence I’d compiled, and hit send.