Meh.

don’t buy it.

our younger brothers and sisters might eat a tide pod and get us blamed for it, but we have more in common with them than we ever had with boomers or gen x.

On Feb 23rd, in reaction to news about camps, AOC tweeted this:

In response to this, AOC then received this question from another user, which she answered, and which is being displayed in isolation above:

If you’re not following, AOC went in on how we need to completely revamp our immigration system and fundamentally restructure it away from a carceral state mentality (aka, prison-based).

She was then honest that this is not something that can be done in 2 months, so she called on everyone to keep pushing towards a radical future.

In response to a very specific question about how we should handle children who arrive at the border unattended, while we get this process of revamping the entire system started, AOC’s response was to:

1. Immediately require that only licensed facilities can house children 

2. Address the actual question of whether or not these services should be contracted out as they are now (Which AOC just made VERY clear her stance on)

3. Specifically cited the issue of companies who are pushing to reopen (again, her stance on this is clear).

4. Then directly drew attention to a comprehensive framework for legislation which AOC and Rep Jayapal are actively trying to get support for. And the only way we get the support, to drive this kind of radical change, is to underscore that the people have power to make this change, and our activism and support is vital.

STOP LETTING PEOPLE PRESENT INFORMATION OUT OF CONTEXT SO THAT IT IS INCENDIARY AND UNDERMINES THE ACTUAL POLITICAL PUSHES THAT ARE IN YOUR INTEREST AND IN LINE WITH YOUR OWN RADICAL POLITICS.

and they are your medical charge,

it is vital to continue to treat them with dignity. Like that. Reassure them with visible practicalities that you acknowledge their fears, will not belittle them, and can show them facts to help them cope.

But someone saying “You ARE transforming into a werewolf but i have a poition thatll stop it! :D” is just as dangerous because you’re furthering a delusion which could get someone hurt. its also manipulative. we’re psychotic, not children.

So what DO you do? Acknowledge that the situation is frightening. If possible, give them the objective facts (ie, i don’t see any monsters; your mom hasn’t said anything to make it seem like she’s going to kill you) while also acknowledging that for them, it is real. Most of all, ask what you can do to keep them comfortable and safe.

she came into the waiting room later to check if I was okay, and I felt safe, cared for, trusted and believed. she told my husband she put a psychiatrist on standby in case I got freaked out again, and told me she understands how I feel, and that she can't see anything but she gets how scary it is for me and she's on shift for a few hours and to ask for her by name if I need reassuring again.

you walk in there for the first time thinkin’ I’m gonna buy some hand soap today and then some dude who smells like something impossible, like he’s being described by a YA author, he smells like lavender, leather, and the steam coming from hot pavement after a short summer rain,

That guy. He comes up to you and he asks if he can help you sample something. He leads you to a small, metal basin of water. It’s so pastoral, it’s so quaint. You can imagine it sitting beside your bed with a porcelain pitcher in your farm cottage for you to use to wash your face in the morning.

He rolls up your sleeve a bit, and you awkwardly apologize for not doing it yourself, and he says it’s fine.

Sir LeatherRain gently rinses your hand in the warm water, and then he dries it off attentively. Then he massages some of the product into your palm. It’s the cinnamon bean massage bar. He says “don’t you love how it feels warm as you rub it in?”

He’s making more direct eye contact with you than you’ve ever made in your entire life.

As he finishes, a woman who smells like coffee beans and pink-skied winter sunrises approaches and says “oh I LOVE that product.”

You know it’s about the sell. It’s transactional, but you’re in love. You can’t help it.

You’re also More uncomfortable than you’ve ever been in your entire life.

this book was originally published on August 14th 2020. as you can see above, Matt Walsh’s tweets were from August 21st - but he wasn’t the only one to notice this garbage, and he wasn’t even the first.

by August 20th, multiple Christian news websites had already taken issue with the book, as you can tell by these hilarious headlines:

and by the end of the 20th (at 5:35pm to be exact) Lifeway issued an apology:

lol, guess they realized they fucked up baaad.

(a day later, Sunday Cool also jumped on board the apology train, with this cringe-worthy nonsense.)

so, both companies apologized, assured people that they weren’t trying to translate the whole bible into this “Gen-Z lingo” (gross), and said that people could still buy the book if they wanted to.

but here’s the deal. the book they’re selling? it’s not the original book.

Exhibit A:

^ that’s the original cover of the book. “The Word According to Gen Z - A 30-Day Devo Challenge.”

but the book they’re selling now? well, see for yourself. Exhibit B:

“The Word According to Gen Z - A 30-Day Devo Challenge Using a Made-Up Language for a Real Generation.”

“Using a Made-Up Language for a Real Generation”

these nerds don’t want to admit that they actually thought Gen Z talked like that! what a lack of commitment. they disappoint me.

and the free sample pdf on their website is edited as well! no longer does it say “Cap G” (short for Capital G, by the way - like how Christians spell “God” with a capital G) and “Big J” - now, it just says “God” and “Jesus.”

…good thing I’m a veritable internet detective, because I found the original sample pdf, which is just as cringey as it looked! I recommend skimming it if you want, because it’s a disaster.

but, now that we know that they edited the book, how will we find out what the rest of the verses were? how ever can we know just how bad it truly was before Christian news sites yelled “blasphemy!” and Lifeway had a collective panic attack?

well, guess what! this devo book came with video lesson tie-ins, and they left their whole website up, for anyone to stumble across!

it’s right here, and it’s…jesus fuck. it’s painful.

here are a few of the other “translations,” next to the original verses, so that you can compare:

Isaiah 40:8, NIV Bible:

“The grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of our God endures forever.”

The “Gen-Z” version:

“Moo moo food goes bye bye, and pedal pads take an L, but Cap G’s scripts are perm.“

what the fuck? what the actual fuck? here, have another:

Matthew 4:4, NIV Bible:

“Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’”

The “Gen-Z” version:

“Dudes can’t make it on sammie blanks alone, gotta feast on that real talk from Cap G.”

“sammie blanks”?? sammie blanks?

Ephesians 6:17, NIV Bible:

“Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.”

The “Gen-Z” version:

“Take that noggin guard of savies and that big ol’ knife of Cap G’s wordz.”

ah, of course. that big ol’ knife.

one last one, and then I’m done with this.

Galatians 6:2, NIV Bible:

“Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.”

The “Gen-Z” version:

“Forklift your fam’s saddies so Cap G’s sched is maxed out and relaxing all cool.”

I…I’ve got nothing. this broke me. I give up!

final notes:

1. don’t go following Matt Walsh on twitter. like, I’m glad he brought this to our attention, but he’s marked red on shinigami eyes, and from his tweets, he looks like a shitty person.

2. all of these translations are actually blasphemy, and I’m pretty sure a few of them count as straight-up heresy. so, there’s a fun thought!

3. I’m pretty sure this is also racist? like, some of these verses seem like mangled AAVE, and that’s not okay! that’s fucking terrible!

4. when you click on any of the video tie-ins, you’ll find out that the guy in the devo videos looks like this:

yes, he’s wearing sunglasses in a dimly-lit room. and yes, he’s wearing a shirt with a picture of praying hands and the word “Yeet” on it. and on that note…

5. what the fuck do they think “yeet” means? I mean, that “yeet pray love” shirt is a work of art, but this begs the question…what do they actually think it means?

what are we supposed to be yeeting?

GET TO KNOW ME MEME: 2/10 FAVOURITE MOVIES

Today, she loves me. Tomorrow, who knows?