The key to a successful relationship is hitting the mutual anxiety sweet spot where you're both just a little bit scared that the other one will decide that they deserve better and leave. Just anxious enough that you gotta make sure that they know you love them and try to give them the best life that you can have together, but not anxious enough to start sabotaging shit because having good things is terrifying.
Aiming for "there's a bee inside your car while you're driving it" level of anxious, not "there's a bee inside your shirt whike you're wearing it" anxious.
listen, I know what your intent here is, and I fully agree with you, but. Specifically for ME, that metaphor is HILARIOUSLY one-sided. I'm deathly afraid of bees and wasps and would probably crash my car if this happened. My fiances keep bees and have driven entire hours with a FULL HIVE in the back of the car. I have vetoed bee journeys if I'm in the car with them lmao.
Would you feel calmer and safer with a bee inside your shirt?
I had a bee crawl down the back of my shirt once! It was very fuzzy and soft. I do get your point about the bees in the car vs your shirt but people will react differently. At least with the shirt i know where the bee is, whereas in the car it would fly around more and therefore make me panic more
Especially if Iβm driving the car, i would not be able to keep my eyes on the road at all and would probably crash
it's poll time! would you rather:
have a bee in the car while you're driving
have a bee inside your shirt while you're wearing it
okay let's clarify:
I have been in a car with a bee and choose the car
I have been in a car with a bee and choose the shirt
I have had a bee inside my shirt and I choose the car
I have had a bee inside my shirt and I choose the shirt
I have had both happen to me and would rather choose the car
I have had both happen to me and would rather choose the shirt
I haven't experienced either one, but I think I'd prefer the car
I haven't experienced either one, but I think I'd prefer the shirt
No nuance because you gotta pick one. If you can't drive, in this scenario you magically can. If you can't wear a shirt, in this scenario you magically can. If you think you could think of an option that you would choose if it was available but it isn't, please write it down on a little post-it note, roll it up, and shove it up your ass. If you cannot figure out what answer to choose, ignore this post and continue on your journey without voting. Thank you for your attention.
Okay, to be fair, I think the point that the first respondant on this chain was making is not 'I think a bee in my shirt is better than a bee in my car', but 'since I am extremely anxious about a bee in my car and my partner is basically fine with a bee in his car, if we are both our version bee-in-a-car level of anxious that would be a really unbalanced relationship'. Which is a fair point (although obviously not OP was talking about) and had nothing to do with the relative anxiety levels of shirt bees and car bees.
I'm aware of this, but at this point I just refuse to believe that an entire 20% of people think that having a bee trapped inside your clothes is a preferable option to having a bee inside your car while you're trying to drive.
