aroace Spanish guy

happy 12th birthday none pizza with left beef

happy sweet 16 to none pizza with left beef

Do love the colors of the eggs?

saw this in my periphery and thought it was the lesbian flag

reblog for lesbian chickens

Hey, no homo, but I am sitting on the broken swing set out back in the perfect, quiet, 2:00am blackness and picturing the softness of your voice and the darkness of your eyes with such perfect and terrible clarity that it feels like I'm choking on my own heartbeat.

Now I'm eating croutons straight out of the bag.

Still no homo ?

I'm gonna level with you, friend: I am eating these croutons gay style.

i didnt think i'd have to say this but this post is made by a transfem, you can like warrior cats and be transfem

OMG everyone I know the ACTUAL story behind the gif this time! Yes, it’s in Australia– that’s a big angry goanna that wandered into a popular restaurant. All the Australians in the vicinity went OH FUCK NO and cleared off, because goannas are mean. The waitress you see there is a French exchange student, who was quoted as saying something to the effect of “I thought it was a weird ugly dog” and had no idea it was a reptile that wanted to rip her arms off. She’s been hailed as a hero who saved diners.

It’s amazing what power “not knowing” has.

The thing I especially love about this is this is a pretty dangerous animal, except she managed to defeat it by just fucking grabbing it by the tail and walking too quickly for it to turn around. Once again the animal kingdom is thwarted because we evolved opposable thumbs, long limbs, and reckless bravery.

weird, ugly dog thwarted by foreign exchange student and polished floors 

my take-home lesson here is that nobody in france has ever first-hand seen a dog

no no, french dogs just be like that

unrecognizable force VS ignorant object

the comments on this get better and better every time it comes across my dash

Please tell me you destroyed this man by proceeding to correct his asinine “correction”.

reblog if you are ASEXUAL, support ASEXUAL PEOPLE, or SECRETLY A DRAGON IN HUMAN FORM

Certified Library Post

happy pride month to this post specifically

you know what really gets my goat?

el chupacabra

Whoa, chupacabra’s a millennial?

is it fucking weird to anyone else to think that deer are like, everywhere

I like how they just avoid Mongolia

Mongolia has an anti-deer forcefield.

What is Alberta doing

we are fucking constantly vigilant 

Hey! Albertan here. I thought rats were fictional until I was 9 years old. I have still never seen a rat in person.

but why???

If anyone’s insecure in their worldbuilding know that the real one is infinitely fucking weirder than anything you could come up with

very interesting to take outrage over a more inclusive flag at its word lol and by “interesting” i mean question this shit

ADD IT TO THE BADASS QUOTE LIST