I'm not going to articulate this super well right now, but the reason why I prefer characters who are bad at communicating feelings to those who do it expertly, is that it's reassuring to see something messy and imperfect being given and received as love.
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i had a dream that time travel was invented and too many people choose to travel back in time to save the titanic from sinking (the question of whether unsinking of the titanic deserved so much attention in the face of human history was the subject of both heavy academic and online discourse), which caused a rift in the space-time-continuum that led to the titanic showing up indiscriminately all over the worldâs oceans and sea in various states of sinking.
this caused a lot of issues both in terms of fixing said space-time-continuum and in terms of nautical navigation, and after a long and heavy battle in the international maritime organization it was decided that the bureaucratic burden of dealing with this was to be upon Ireland, much to their dismay. the Irish Government then released an app for all sailors and seafarers so they could report titanic sightings during their journeys, even though they heavily dissuaded you from reporting them given the paperwork it caused.
anyway i woke up with a clear image of the app in my head and needed to recreate it for all of you:
"Horse but make it a lizard and give it bat wings and horns"
didnt know how to interpret "make it a lizard" so i wrote lizard and drew an arrow pointing to the horse so people know its a lizard. Also didn't know what bat horns were so I gave it a horned bat nose
"A body like a big cat but completely covered in scales, the head of a crocodile with the horns of an ibex, and the wings of a bat on its back"
On it boss o7, ive mashed all these animals together and threw scales all over it. This the dragon you saw?
"Take a lizard, extend the neck. Add a pair of bat wings to the back. Add horns and sharp teeth."
Seems like we're onto somethin' boss! Though idk how it'd be so fearsome bein such a small thing.
"Imagine a winged alligator that was 70 feet tall and aware of its existence"
i dont know if this is a dragon but it could definitely be some kind of god
"Dinosaur with wings and horns?"
Dunno which dino you were talkin about so i just picked a random one. Stegosauus :}
"Big snake with legs and horns that can breathe fire"
Ah. Hm.
"A dragon is like a tree, in that it's a made up category for a broadly similar type of mythological creature that has no relationship to other dragons, but you know a dragon when you see one the way you know a tree when you see one."
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i NEED people to realise foreshadowing is. in fact. a literary device. and not a Bad Thing. the audience picking up on your hints is a Good Thing. because. it makes the story and itâs conclusion make sense. and some people will not see those but enjoy seeing them on a second read through. red herrings are one thing but if your novel consists of nothing but red herrings itâs not a coherent story itâs just a collection of paragraphs that donât actually plausibly link to one another. you're not fighting with the audience you donât look clever you look like you donât know how basic fiction works. be vulnerable for once in your goddamn life and don't treat writing like a game to be won where the audience losing is a good thing.
Screw ancient orders. Weâre founding an order of knights right now. Youâve gotta keep your knights busy or else theyâll raid and pillage the countryside.
âThis is my grandpaâs tomb. Heâs not even dead yet. Itâs got holes because we havenât finished it. Please donât break the sarcophagus. We paid a lot for it.â
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itâs actually really easy to satisfy audiences with Good Representation. you canât depict someone struggling with their Otherness because that portrays it in a bad light but you have to depict them struggling with their Otherness because if you donât, then youâre romanticizing how hard it is to be Othered. be super careful not to depict anything that might be adjacent to a common stereotype but if you go too far to avoid all stereotypes, then youâre still building the characters around stereotypes, which is a stereotype in its own way. if your storyline uses tropes, then itâs cliche, but if it avoids tropes, then itâs inauthentic. if you lampshade any of this, then youâre speaking down to your audience but if you donât acknowledge this, youâre also speaking down to your audience. this is all really easy stuff i donât know why people donât get it.
How to Write a Characterâs Breaking Point (+Sensory Details Cheat Sheet)
1. Strip Away Their Last Defense
A breakdown only lands if the character has nothing left to protect themselves with. Take away the coping mechanism theyâve relied on â their pride, their control, their relationships, their denial, or their hope.
The breakdown isnât caused by pain. Itâs caused by the loss of what kept them standing in that pain.
2. Make the Trigger Small but Devastating
The moment that breaks them should often be quiet, personal, and specific, not just the biggest explosion.
A single line of dialogue, a realization, or a tiny betrayal can hurt more than the obvious disaster.
3. Let Them Resist the Fall
Donât drop them instantly into collapse. Let them try to hold it together first. That resistance creates tension and makes the fall feel earned and painful.
4. Show the Internal Shatter Before the External One
Start with the internal fracture â the belief that dies, the truth they canât ignore, the hope that finally gives out â then let the external breakdown follow.
5. Let the Breakdown Change Them
A real breaking point permanently alters the character. After this moment, they donât return to who they were before â even if they heal.
⌠Sensory Cheat Sheet for Writing Breakdowns
Use 2â3 of these at most so the scene stays sharp and not overloaded.
Physical Sensations
Chest feels tight, hollow, or painfully heavy
Hands shaking, numb, or clenched too hard
Throat burning, closing, or unable to form words
Sudden weakness in knees or limbs
Feeling too hot or too cold all at once
Emotional Sensations
Sudden exhaustion rather than loud sadness
A sense of âwhatâs the point anymore?â
Feeling disconnected from their body or surroundings
A sharp wave of shame, guilt, or self-loathing
Emotional numbness replacing intensity
Mental Experience
Thoughts looping uncontrollably
A single devastating realization repeating in their mind
Trouble focusing on anything except the pain
Feeling like time has slowed or stopped
A sense of being very small, trapped, or exposed
Behavioral Tells
Going silent instead of crying
Laughing at the wrong moment
Snapping at someone who doesnât deserve it
Making a reckless or self-destructive choice
Withdrawing completely from others
Environmental Mirroring (Optional but powerful)
A room that feels too quiet, too loud, or too small
Harsh lighting or deep shadows
Weather that contrasts their emotion (sunny during despair, storm during numbness)
A comforting object that now feels meaningless
⌠Final Tip
A breakdown isnât about how dramatic the moment is â itâs about how personally devastating it is for that specific character. The more tailored the pain is to their fears, flaws, and desires, the harder it hits the reader.
âGrief is the emotional reaction to a loss, in this case, to deathâ (Samuel, 2019, p. xvii), and mourning is the process of adjustment to a world without that person.
The following physical sensations and perceptual experiences often accompany the grieving process (modified from Worden, 2009):
Hollowness in the stomach
Tightness in the throat and chest
Being oversensitive to noise
Feelings of unreality
Shortness of breath
Muscle weakness and lack of energy
Dry mouth
Strong emotions typically occur during grief, including (from Worden, 2009):
Sadness. Failure to acknowledge and embrace sadness can cause more complicated and prolonged grief.
Anger. A common reaction to loss that leads to many issues during the grieving process.
Guilt and self-reproach. Often regarding something that happened or was neglected at the time of death.
Anxiety. Ranging from feelings of insecurity to panic attacks, sometimes associated with fears of being unable to take care of yourself in the absence of the other person.
Loneliness. The loss of a day-to-day relationship can leave someone feeling all alone. Social support can help but does not remove the sense of a broken attachment.
Fatigue. Feelings of apathy and listlessness are not uncommon following the death of a loved one and may limit behavior and activity.
Helplessness. Survivors can be left feeling vulnerable and helpless, especially when they have young children to look after.
Shock. Sudden death, by its very nature, can cause the survivor to experience shock.
Yearning. Yearning or pining for the loved one is a typical reaction to death, and as it reduces, may indicate the mourning process is coming to an end.
Emancipation and relief. It is not uncommon for a survivor to experience a sense of relief, especially where the deceased was oppressive or was suffering a prolonged illness. While a normal response, it may be accompanied by feelings of guilt.
Numbness. While the previous feelings are common, so too is an absence of emotions, at least initially. With so many feelings to experience and manage, the early stages of grief may be overwhelming and result in a protective numbness.
It is important to note that each personâs experience of grief is different, and while the emotions above are typical of loss, they are not exhaustive.
Types of grief can take various forms, including (Elizz by SE Health, 2019; CaringInfo, n.d.; WebMD, n.d.):
Abbreviated grief. A short-lived response to a death, possibly following the experience of prolonged anticipatory grief or something immediately filling the space left by the loss.
Absent grief. The bereaved may not acknowledge or may remain in denial of what has happened. If prolonged, the lack of response can be concerning and require specialist support.
Anticipatory grief. For a caregiver, grief can begin before the person being cared for dies. It may be associated with a sense of losing what they expected life to be like. Such feelings can start with a terminal diagnosis or a worsening state of health.
Chronic grief. A sub-type of complicated grief (see below), left untreated, chronic grief can involve extreme feelings of hopelessness, a sense of disbelief, and a loss of meaning, leading to severe clinical depression or thoughts of self-harm and even suicide.
Collective grief. A shared experience of grief that affects a family, group, or community, often preceded by an event (natural disaster or attack).
Complicated grief. Where grief seems to deviate from whatâs expected, complicated grief interferes with the ability to function. Complicated grief may include chronic (see above), delayed, or absent grief (American Psychological Association, n.d.).
Cumulative grief. Multiple deaths over a period of time can leave the bereaved without the opportunity or capacity to process each loss.
Delayed grief. Grief may not occur immediately after losing a loved one but may be postponed until another significant event occurs, resulting in what may seem an excessive response to the present situation.
Distorted grief. An extreme form of complicated grief exhibited as self-destructive behavior, anger, guilt, or hostility toward others.
Disenfranchised grief. When others do not recognize the importance of the loss, such as the death of an ex-partner, pet, or colleague. Society may consider the loss as minor or not legitimate.
Inhibited grief. Grief may not always be outwardly visible; it may result from a conscious effort to maintain privacy or keep emotions hidden from close friends or family.
Masked grief. Atypical physical symptoms and behaviors can be a response to grief without being attributed to the loss.
Normal grief. While there may not be a âtypicalâ grief shared by everyone, normal grief is considered to be when emotional intensity surrounding the death gradually decreases or basic daily activities begin to return to normal.
âWe need to learn to support a healthy grieving, and to help people to understand that each person goes at their own paceâ (Samuel, 2019, p. XX).
The treatment given to those attempting to process grief must be specific to the individual and their experience. The following approaches overlap and complement one another in supporting the bereaved (modified from Worden, 2009).
Helping the survivor actualize loss
When and where did the death occur?
What happened?
How were you told and where were you?
Visiting the grave can also make the loss more concrete.
Helping the survivor identify and experience feelings
Many feelings may not be recognized or felt to their full degree during intense grief. It is essential to help survivors experience the following:
Anger â arising from feelings of frustration and helplessness.
Guilt â for what the bereaved did and did not do to affect the outcome (usually irrational).
Anxiety and helplessness â feelings of helplessness can leave the bereaved unsure if they can survive alone and concerned about their own mortality.
Sadness â it can be challenging for many to show their upset in front of others. Crying can be helpful if associated with an awareness of what was lost.
Assisting living without the deceased
What problems are you facing, and how can they be resolved?
It is important to neither rush the bereaved to make decisions nor encourage a sense of helplessness, but instead communicate that they will be able to make decisions when they are ready.
Helping find meaning in the loss
Why did this happen?
Why did this happen to me?
How has this loss changed me?
Allowing for individual differences
No two people grieve in the same way; the process and feelings associated with loss are unique. There is tremendous variability in the following:
I just wrote 8 pages when I haven't written in months and was beginning to think I'd never be able to again. Idk what it is, but I am sharing and manifesting this energy for every writer who sees this. May you write 8 quality pages effortlessly and find joy writing once more
Dictamnus is a genus of flowering plant in the family Rutaceae, with a single species, Dictamnus albus, which has several geographical variants. It is known variously as burning bush, false dittany, white dittany, gas plant and Fraxinella
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At a young age, Wizards were taught that the best way to gauge a magic-user's strength would be through their familiar, with the strongest familiar of them all being a Dragon. When the time came to summon your familiar, you somehow managed to summon a Tarrasque.
If you are writing a Romance, especially one you want your readers to root for, please make sure you take the time to include lots of little scenes that show that:
your characters actually are *friends* as well as lovers,
they enjoy spending time with each other on a casual basis
they respect as well as love each other
they try to communicate their feelings clearly instead of bottling their ire up til it explodes in violent arguments
neither of your characters are genuinely afraid of the other when they're angry
that they do not threaten each other with bodily harm during arguments, or use physical force
they respect each other's consent, and respect their partner's wants and wishes when it comes to physical affection.
pretty much to sum it up: do your characters actually enjoy being with each other, or is the entire relationship built on lust and dramatic arguments and nothing else?
Because if your relationship is the latter, your readers are more likely to want them to *break up* rather than *stay together*.
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