Collecting Hobbies Is My Hobby

Tumblr is the reason why I have something I call the cashier test which is, if i told this to a random cashier at the grocery store, would they think you're crazy at best or at worst would they be warranted in leaping over the counter and beating the shit out of you. Karl Marx mpreg is crazy, but not beating the shit out of you crazy. The cashier will probably talk about you to their coworkers and it might even make their day. Telling someone they're complicit in their own oppression by working a minimum wage job at a grocery store makes them warranted in leaping over the counter to beat the shit out of you.

I need a blowjob but I don’t have a penis or a strap on and I’m not taking off my pants so you’re just gonna have to figure it out

Dean Winchester sex fantasy: what if there was a little guy who was buddy shaped and he had *never* listened to music like he literally missed out on entirety of modern music, he doesn't know about it. And then you (Dean Winchester) got to show him Music. And explain it to him.

That time he bought twitter to make everyone stop dunking on him and STILL got horribly rekt

We should popularize more hispanized phonetic spellings of classic character names like we did with esnupi

I made a wheel for this for better randomising.

if you're having trouble sleeping the best you can do is put a bright object close to your face and look at it for at least 30 minutes. if that doesn't work you can close your eyes but make sure to think really hard about a bunch of bullshit

what the FUCK did Jolene look like