here is my portfolio + here are past commissions

i'm willing to write about most topics and that's something we can discuss. my prices are flexible, but my base price is currently 40¢ USD per word, more if you want a specific and challenging form (i.e. you're gonna pay for iambic pentameter because it's a lot more work). I am open to discussion if that is the case.

i am also offering a discount of 20¢ USD per word if you donate $10 or more to at least 1 palestinian fundraiser. if you donate $50 or more, your poem is $5, flat rate.* evidence is necessary

> uses piranha solution

it's still actually perfectly fine to do it

and you shouldn't stop yourself from starting just because it won't be a permanent change.

Like if starting a new daily planner gives you an amazing afternoon of planning and four days where you feel in charge of your life,

why not do it?

It doesn't matter that it won't be a permanent change - 4 good days is still worth it.

If you ever catch yourself thinking, "I wish I could pray/stretch/prep/plan/do the thing, but I always get started on that and it never lasts more than a couple of days,"

what this really means is, "hey, I can feel better for a couple of days."

if this post is making you think of things in your own life that you wish you could stick to because of how good they make you feel,

just be aware:

you're not thinking of a list of ways you've failed to commit

maybe it does make you a bad person.

maybe it's all real and not actually OCD.

you'll never know. that is a risk you have to take.

see, the point of dealing with those fears isn't to eliminate them. to find counter-arguments, to reassure yourself or others that you would never truly want that.

that's just playing into the OCD spiral.

which is why those reassurance posts on tumblr are well meant but poorly done.

they feed into the same moral purity thinking that makes OCD so unbearable.

so maybe you really are a horrible person who's done reproachable things, who secretly wants or has done the unthinkable.

... so what.

take that risk. take the risk that maybe it's true. that maybe you're bad. accept the risk and sit with the fear it causes.

if you learn to live with the risk, one day it won't feel so daunting, I promise.

to realise that maybe you're an ok person, you have to accept that maybe you're a bad person.

because at the end of the day... who cares.

randos on tumblr? they also think that a height difference in a relationship means the taller person is a pedophile.

some idiot irl? they think OCD is colour coordinating your pens.