Look out for the girl...

he is slowly walking from Jamaica to Britain on the seafloor like Dracula (2020)

Green heron (Butorides virescens)

sucking at something is the first step to getting good at it

american blackbirds are icterids but european blackbirds are thrushes but american robins are thrushes but european robins are flycatchers and they are named robin because (checks notes) brits in the 1400s called them "robert" on account of they are just some familiar guy who shows up in your yard. hold on post canceled is that really why they are called that? what the fuck. they did this with jackdaws and magpies too? i can't even be annoyed. how human. "who's that? that's bob." fuck dude it sure is.

as a child being told "the moon controls the tides" with no additional explanation was like. oh okay. you want me to believe in magic? you're talking about magic right now? okay. fine

oh to be a slightly ridiculous looking sea monster on a geographically inaccurate medieval map

it is a truth universally acknowledged that having fun isn't hard when you've got a library card

we learn from history that most people do not learn from history

Times are hard at the cafe so they only got Something bagels

I think that if you had enough daughters AND played your cards right you could spring Mambo Number Five out at the EXACT right gathering and shatter your entire family's trust forever

The secret is to name them out of order with the lyrics so by the time anyone catches on it's too late

For me personally the ideal gathering would be my funeral

Could mean good things!

Hey @evilwizard. So, you up to anything new lately?

haha it’s funny you ask

we've never found concrete proof of Nessie because we haven't loch'ed in