like a deep and distant dream

you've gotta be kind to yourself no matter what

this is twice as true in the winter

the world isn't ending and you don't need to kill yourself it's literally december. it's december. and you need to be nice to yourself.

I’m a lover by nature except for when I’m a wretched hater cunt bitch which I also am by nature

For those of you with android devices, you can use the Android Debug Bridge (ADB) standalone app control program to get rid of all the bloatware, data mining, and AI crap - no coding needed!

save

“never kill yourself” is such a funny phrase to me that i think it’s accidently started working. its like an affrimation. say ‘never kill yourself’ enough times as a joke and maybe you won’t try to kill yourself over minor inconviences anymore

Read all of these in different voices

you can deal so much damage by just switching articles. “i’m so hungry, i could eat the horse.” one-hit k.o.

don’t look the gift horse in a mouth

you can also add horses to other idioms, such as, “don’t count your horses before they hatch.” you can do this in any number of ways

first day in the time loop it is not a loop yet. i go about my day and its a pretty good day and when i make my evening cup of tea i wish all days were like this

second day in the time loop and in the moment before waking i have a dream about something i have to do tomorrow. i do not realise i will never get to do it.

third day in the time loop i get hit with a wave of deja vu sitting in traffic. i am bored of the songs on the radio.

fourth day in the time loop i realise i am mouthing along to my lecturer even though i do not know anything about the sampling of early electronic music.

sixth day in the time loop my friend says hello to me and i say 'yes i know'. she looks at me funny and i apologise. she starts telling me about her girlfriend and i simply do not care. i feel mean for not caring. when i get home i accidentally walk into a doorframe which does not improve my mood. i realise i already have a bruise on my elbow.

seventh day in the time loop i realise there has been a cloud shaped like a weasel outside my bedroom window for the last week. i think 'what are the chances of that' and then i realise the chances are very very low.

eighth day in the time loop i skip everything i had planned to sit by the river and read. i know all about the sampling of early electronic music now and if i have to listen to the radio play summertime or my friend talk about her girlfriend and her stupid cat one more time i am going to scream.

ninth day in the time loop the irony of hearing summertime every day becomes apparent. i am trapped in an endless summer day. i remember the saying about not being able to stand in the same river twice so i make a point of standing in the same river for half an hour on the off chance i'm doing it at the same time as i dipped my feet in yesterday just so i could be the exception.

tenth day in the time loop it is very obvious that no one else know they are in a loop. i wonder if the whole world is looped and i'm just the only one who knows it or if i'm the only one who is looped and the world is seeing endless double exposures of me. i wonder which loop is the real one.

eleventh day in the time loop i wonder if i'm aging at all.

twelfth day in the time loop i start to think about video games. playing the same level over and over and over again. you die on the same point of the level every time but you re appear the start to have another go. i wonder what part of the day i am stuck on. which obstacle i have to beat to get to move on to tomorrow.

thirteenth day in the time loop i am remembering everything now. i do not think i did at the start but i can definitely remember what i had for breakfast yesterday morning because that was today. my friend calls me in the middle of the night asking why i wasn't at the lecture. i start telling her that i've already been to that lecture six times when it hits midnight and the loop resets.

fourteenth day in the time loop i drive as far away as possible to see if i still wake up in my bed when the loop resets. i get a cheese and pickle sandwich from a gas station but it sucks so i leave without paying. i do buy a packet of gum though. just not the sandwich. i wonder how food works in a time loop and suppose food consumed gets um-consumed. the radio stills play summertime and as i drive i think about the inherent time loop of a song. the exact same four and a half minutes over and over and over again. i wonder if we have a god complex about our favourite songs. i wonder if i am getting to wound up in the themes of the time loop and if there is an easier way to solve this than getting philosophical. it is a long car ride and i have a lot of time to think. but still only twenty four hours.

fifteenth day in the time loop i get up early wash my hair and sit outside on the porch. a woman walks past with her dog. they were not there on the fourteen day and i think this is a good sign.

sixteenth day in the time loop i open my diary and see that i have been writing on the same page over and over and over. i turn the page and write 'today is tomorrow' in big letters.

on the seventeenth day i the loop breaks. i still don't know what i did. i don't think it was the diary page because that reset but the world didn't. or i didn't. or something. i go to the scheduled lecture and i'm so relieved its not about early electronic samples i get lost in the lecturer's voice and forget to take notes. i order a piece of lemon cake from the cafe because they didn't have it yesterday but they do today. i hang out with my friend and she tells me about some endearing silly thing her girlfriend did and i laugh. it's a nice day. i find myself thinking 'i wish more days were like this' but i don't think i do, actually.

Official Time Loop Post

Just learned about recency bias, coolest thing ive ever learned about lol

"these researchers published a paper on something that literally any of us could have told you 🙄" ok well my supervisors wont let me write something in my thesis unless I can back it up with a citation so maybe it's a good thing that they're amplifying your voice to the scientific community in a way that prevents people from writing off your experiences as annecdotal evidence

they did the research in the first place because they believed you and wanted to tell people about it. they are not our enemies.

Oh NOBODY'S going to be horny after this

my ankle is so fuckin horny tho

A victorian

Every reply this is is another punch in the gut

RULE NO. 1 OF WOUND CARE: ignore itttt :33

DO NOT

RULE NO. 2 OF WOUND CARE: go swimming!! in a pond or especially a public pool :)

WHO TF ARE YOU?!?!?!

hey followers. have you ever wanted to know how it feels to be inside a bag of cornflakes

ye

enter the cornflakes domain

I fucking hate this website because not only did I click this goddamn link expecting it to be a joke of some sort, but it wasn’t a joke and I sat here spinning the screen around enjoying myself in a stupid bag of cornflakes like the dumbass monkey I am on Tumblr.com, enthralled by being in a bag of corn flakes in

Kid today (probably like 6 years) came up to me and was like "teacher teacher what's your name" and i was like "asha :) also im not a teacher" and he was like "okay asha asha asha I need help" and i was like "okay buddy what's wrong" and he showed me this chunk of metal he'd found sitting in the sun that he was just carrying around and it was super sharp and super hot from the sun and he was like "my hand hurts :(" and i was like "ok. put that down. does it still hurt?" And he did and was like "no." and then he picked it up again and immediately went "my hand hurts :(" again and then I was like "kid. put that down and stop touching it" and he was like "ok but when I touch it my hand hurts :(" and i was like "Please Just Stop Touching That. If you dont touch it your hand won't hurt" and this went on for like another 2 minutes before i got him to realize that if he stopped touching the metal it would not hurt. Kids are so fucking weird man

I am so happy I live in a western democracy, if I speak out about my boss I have to find a new job if I speak out about my landlord I have to find a new home if I speak out online I will be muted or banned I can buy 40 brands of breakfast cereal all owned by three different companies if I protest in the street I will be arrested this is the best