the mystery shall remain

does anybody know how to get out of bed. or be a better person

They just don’t release the hounds like they used to

in my day someone just let the dogs out. never did know who.

my farming sim game will have animal butchery as a normalized part of the gameplay loop to act as a lightning rod to draw all the discourse and thinkpieces away from topics that would annoy me more

in my farming sim game that has animal butchery as a normalized part of the gameplay loop, shipped products will be sold on a weekly basis, not a daily one. you get a big windfall once a week and then you budget around that. if you want more money in the interim you have to go sell to the local merchants whatever products they specialize in.

in my farming sim game, getting married to one of the townspeople will have a significant impact on your gameplay. if you marry the rival farmer, their smaller farm will be merged with yours. if you marry the town alchemist/doctor you get a buff to all your alchemy and you wake up from getting knocked out in your own home instead of their clinic. if you marry the priestess she uh, idk she does weather related divine magic for you so you can choose the weather, idk i haven't thought too hard about that one yet

my farming sim game will have a MILF you can actually F

When I was writing this post, I was originally using she/her pronouns before I decided Odo was a he/him lesbian but I forgot to change one of them so now it sounds like Kira is making the announcement for him and honestly, I stand by that.

love the word fruitless. arguing with you is like if there was no apples involved whatsoever

you're bountiless you stupid bitch

And what, pray tell, is so wrong with that? Must a king lower himself to the vocabulary of insects? Must an academiac explain his reasoning to kindergartners? There is no shame in knowledge nor is there in verbosity. Quite the opposite, they are to be celebrated. But I guess this is the world we are forced to inhabit. This world... This planet, teeming with life and all its infinite possibilities. And you would dare dilute it, so that a simpleton's mind could comprehend it? I will not stand for this. No more shall a man be judged for his might, his ambition, his intellect. No more shall we look down on those who propose a mere thought experiment about owning a human pec9sdjv0 c9i2ewokhndvoi adsjvci uwqeowdsxujvnli ufdsiuljfcniu ofeidcvjpc9nUIODSuljvniuwqopisafjvp985erioewaudJHB9jrg8frjuv8ar9jvuw08rd9vujq35g89spdujigk[0e9ravjik0rvu9jq54w8yvh r8og;af9ukjgmoiaelgurj9g8zboifyhvlo8fivujawp89 OC:Ivjare0sd9oizl

You won't... Keep me... from Hot Topic... forever...

I'm still thinking about the guy who saw me realize my wheelchair wouldn't fit in the elevator because he (also a wheelchair user) was already inside it and immediately quipped, "This elevator ain't accessible enough for the both of us."

problem i have is whenever i read write say or hear "sugar baby" my brain is like oh yeah, i know what that is! pretty sure we can reliably derive meaning for this term based on other definitions that precede it in our internal lexicon, like "sugar glider" and "bush baby". we are definitely talking about some kind of small arboreal marsupial with large eyes. it's probably not ethical for this wealthy patron to be keeping one as a pet

what if one day you opened tumblr and someone posted a picture of you that you'd never seen before and it was captioned like "okay we can all agree this is the worst mcelroy right?" and you go through the thousands of notes and everyone is talking shit about you by name. and youre the worst mcelroy now.

can every writer and director in hollywood just get in a big big room and pinky promise to not release a movie about wwii for like 5 years. every summer we have to hear about a movie called Platoon about the untold story of one platoon who had to carry one mechanical part across occupied france and without it the allies would have lost the war. it stars every white actor in the UK