the mystery shall remain

i've never been to the southern us i get all my information from tennessee williams plays

everyone in the south is a repressed homosexual

ladies and gentlemen of the jury, today i would like to present a bold, feminist reimagining of the evidence you've seen presented against my client

Everyone wish me luck on my date today I’m so nervous what if they don’t like me…

You show up and Michael B Jordan is sitting in both seats.

☝️only funny addition so far. I’m actually shocked nobody else thought of that yet

I think those fancomics where Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes is transgender are cute and fun but I also think it's a deep misunderstanding of Calvin's character to think he would transition into a heterosexual normie who goes to her high school reunion. That girl would have neopronouns and fang implants

Adult Calvin is a tattoo artist named Panthera who is the bassist in a terrible metal band called Captain Napalm and Hobbes helps do faer E injections

I know it's like 2 weeks too late to change it but I'm so mad I didn't realize that the band would obviously be called "Get Rid Of Slimy GirlS". I walk the road of shame

Reblogging in honor of the first day of baseball season.

LMAO RANDY JOHNSON ITS TRUE

I think it’s ridiculous that the general standard for “androgyny” includes flat chests and short hair btw. think we should talk about that

does anybody know how to get out of bed. or be a better person

They just don’t release the hounds like they used to

in my day someone just let the dogs out. never did know who.