eddie doesn't reflect on the exact words he used with buck in the kitchen.
all he knows is that afterwards he feels better, like when he reclaimed christopher but this time the voice inside him is quiet, settled, instead of cheering. he does remember buck's face, though. things got tense and this loss has been hard on all of them. he already knows he can't debrief with buck about it. he doesn't have space for the full buck and it would end up undoing everything he got from it.
eddie uses tools that have worked before. pepa gets to be a matriarch, chris gets to see her and buck again, and buck gets the full force of a pepa heart to heart. that's worth a lot. it used to keep eddie going as a kid, when his mom would make one cutting remark too many and his dad was gone more often than not.
so they're good. eddie's a little confused when buck says he plans to transfer, but they don't talk about that either. eddie ends up saving buck and ravi. then chim steps up in a big way, reminding them all that they are bobby's legacy. it's amazing. of course he's gonna stay.
"so, i guess taking the house back makes the most sense," buck says.
"i mean, yeah," eddie says, relieved he brought it up.
"it's fine," buck says. "i was just subletting."
a few days later he calls buck to let him know adriana's best friend has a great deal on a moving van, but it's only available this weekend. "do you think...?"
"yeah," buck says, automatically. "i can have all my stuff out."
"it's tight, i know," eddie says, surprised.
"consider it done." buck must have somewhere to go. good for him.
eddie lets him go after that. they've both got a lot to do.
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Conversational skill check: Work acquaintance mentions in an offhand tone with no discernible expression that they have recently lost over 20 pounds. They fail to elaborate. A response is expected.
I have learned that there is a very narrow window of human experiences that can ONLY be answered with âCongratulationsâ or âIâm so sorryâ and those are
Dramatic weight loss
A Pregnancy
A breakup
A divorce
A major medical diagnosis
And because I can never seem to guess which way, and to be wrong in either direction would be catastrophic, I have taken to simply asking back: âis this a good thingâ
This has had a 98% success rate. Studies are however ongoing
I love that I share my house with one of the most efficient apex predators millions of years of evolution could produce. I love that two of natureâs most prolific machines met and were like âhmmm. We should lay around and do nothing togetherâ. Now weâre both fat and happy and full of meat. The hedonism of it all
Humans keeping cats and dogs as family members is like three prodigy assassins being introduced in the back of a shady nightclub and 45 minutes later theyâre 6 crunchwrap supremes deep passing a blunt in the back of a shag carpeted Volkswagen microbus rating Oreo varietals by fuckability
tumblr users have the unique ability to string together sentences never before seen in all of human history and yet they conjure up such specific visceral imagery that you canât help but be a little in awe. and i think thatâs beautiful
already this has tags in the notes like â#anti aiâ but... this is just real life with almost everything. this is like grifter 101 please donât exceptionalize needing to be critical of chatgpt.
Itâs also where we get âcon artistâ, aka âconfidence artistâ. Itâs someone who dazzles you with the assurance that they know what they are talking about because they speak with absolute certainty despite not knowing anything. I dare say itâs gotten worse with the internet because text and careful/exciting editing makes people seem more confident than before - and if you think youâre immune, you arenât.
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did i ever tell u guys that in fifth grade my class wrote a play bc we were studying ancient greece? it was called persephone and the (not so hot) heroes. i played demeter. basically, persephone got kidnapped by kronos and i strong armed hades into giving me 3 heroes from the underworld to get her back but they were actually terrible and i forget how she was actually saved but bottom line is that you wish you were my fifth grade class
I want to see this play so badly. âI canât undo the laws of death. Just think of the paperwork.â is the most true to character Hades in decades,
Random linguistic worldbuilding: A language with six sets of pronouns, which are set by one's current state of existence. There's a separate pronoun for people who are alive, people who are dead, and potential future people who are yet to be born, and the ambiguous ones of "may or may not be alive or aleady dead", "may or may not have even been born yet", and the ultimate general/ambiguous all-covering one that covers all ambiguous states.
The culture has a specific defined term for that tragic span of time when a widow keeps accidentally referring to their spouse with living pronouns. New parents-to-be dropping the happy surprise news of a pregnancy by referring to their future child with the "is yet to be born" pronoun instead of a more ambiguous one and waiting for the "wait what did you just say?" reactions.
Someone jokingly referring to themselves with the dead person pronouns just to highlight how horrible their current hangover is. A notorious aspiring ladies' man who keeps trying to pursue women in their 20s despite of approaching middle age fails to notice the insult when someone asks him when he's planning to get married, and uses the pronoun that implies that his ideal future bride may not even be born yet.
A mother whose young adult child just moved away from home for the first time, who continues to dramatically refer to their child with "may or may not be already dead" until the aforementioned child replies to her on facebook like "ma stop telling people I'm dead" and having her respond with "well how could I possibly know that when you don't even write to us? >:,C"
@witchofanguish it is also used in poetry and plays, ghosts talk like that. Imagine being in a folk story, staying overnight in an abandoned cabin and in the middle of the night there's a knock on the door and a bellowing voice going
LET ME IN.
and from the "me" alone you know that whoever is out there is not one among the living.
ok but also: imagine the mysterious stranger implying that they don't know whether they themselves are alive or dead.
Ghost stories where the characters don't know they're ghosts and keep referring to themselves by living pronouns, where the audience doesn't know they're dead for most of the story. Ghosts that signal that they're ready to move on by using I'm-dead pronouns.
The Princess Bride is such a funny book to read after ONLY seeing the movie. Like Goldman made up a fake author from a fake country and proceeded to write the book as an abridged version of what the fake author wrote... and then he proceeds to add in notes to the "abridged version" mentioning all the boring world building stuff he skipped because it was boring.
Like shout out to William Goldman, man really did make an entire book that is just "the cool scenes you thought of in your head" and then made up a fake author to abridge so he doesn't have to connect them.
I used to work at a used bookstore, and had a group of three teenage boys come in wanting the "Unabridged Version" of Princess Bride.
They would not believe that it was a narrative device and the unabridged version didn't exist. Said no author would credit someone else for their own writing, that was ridiculous, and was there a guy who knew about fantasy they could talk to?
I grabbed a coworker and left him to deal with it. Heard him explaining the concept of a pen name as I walked away.
Although one of the big things of the "Unabridged Princess Bride" is that Goldman-as-character has declared that it's actually...super boring [if you aren't a tumblr user fascinated by political satire].
In Goldman's "footnotes," he describes how his father used to read The Princess Bride aloud to him; thus the book became Goldman's favorite without him ever actually reading the text. As a father, Goldman looked forward to sharing the story with his own son, going to great lengths to locate a copy for his son's birthday, only to be crushed when his son stops reading after the first chapter. When Goldman revisits the book himself, he discovers that what he believed was a straightforward adventure novel was in fact a bitter satire of politics in Morgenstern's native Florin, and that his father had been skipping all the political commentary and leaving in only "the good parts." This moves Goldman to abridge the book to a version resembling the one his father had read to him, while adding notes to summarize material he had "removed." Morgenstern and the "original version" are fictitious and used as a literary device to comment on the nature of adaptation and to draw a contrast between the love and adventure of the main story and the mundane aspects of everyday life.[5] The nations of Guilder and Florin are likewise pure fiction.[5] Each section or chapter takes place in a certain setting or place. It's an episodic structure with each "episode" taking place in a specific part of the Kingdom of Florin (the Cliffs of Insanity, the Fire Swamp or the Forest of Thieves). [6]
Also, this is too funny to leave out:
In the novel's commentary, Goldman writes that he added nothing to the "original" Morgenstern text. He did write one original scene, a loving reunion between Buttercup and Westley, but, he said, his publisher objected to this addition.[13] He invites any reader who wants to read the "Reunion Scene" to write to the publisher (formerly Harcourt Brace Jovanovich; now Random House) and request a copy. Many readers wrote in to the publisher and did receive a letter, but instead of an extra scene, the letter detailed the (obviously fictitious) legal problems that Goldman and his publishers encountered with the Morgenstern estate and its lawyer, Kermit Shog. This letter was revised and updated periodically; the 1987 revision mentioned the movie, while the 25th Anniversary Edition published the letter with an addendum about Kermit's lawyer granddaughter Carly. The 30th Anniversary Edition has a footnote that the three pages of the reunion scene were now available online.[14] However, the website itself contained nothing but the text of the original three letters. This website has since been taken down and superseded by the Houghton Mifflin Harcourt product page for the book, which provides the 2003 version of the Reunion Scene letter as a digital download.[15]
you misunderstand, this isn't 'I look like the ground so predators walk right past me' camouflage, this is 'I look like the savannah grass so I can pounce on unsuspecting prey' camouflage
they're hiding in the hoards to bite the hands of unsuspecting humans who sneak past mama
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Every 21st century piece of writing advice: Make us CARE about the character from page 1! Make us empathize with them! Make them interesting and different but still relatable and likable!
Every piece of classic literature: Hi. It's me. The bland everyman whose only purpose is to tell you this story. I have no actual personality. Here's the story of the time I encountered the worst people I ever met in my life. But first, ten pages of description about the place in which I met them.
Modern writing advice: Make sure your POV character goes through a significant arc! Make sure they are changed by the narrative! Make sure they learn a lesson!
Narrators of every book of the 19th century: the lesson I learned is these people fucking suck, sayonara you freaks
Modern writing advice: Itâs all about the character overcoming obstacles and learning! They learn their lesson so they can fix their mistakes and make good choices in the future! Itâs a character arc! Itâs called growth! Readers love it!
Everyone from ancient times through the 19th century: would you like to watch a Guy fuck up twenty times in a row
Yeah 𼺠it is rough out here when you have your ships but also just like buck. No I don't want people to be mean to him for no reason or to always be the punchline or to be abandoned yet again. He could do so much more as a character. I wish they'd understand there can still be drama, miscommunicaton, injury and whatnot without always leaving buck with nothing in the end. Now he doesn't even have bobby in his corner, he gave up his home, he was told no on a transfer, he's still on that hamster wheel. Like what are we doing. It's not boring to give him at least 1 steady thing in his life (and it's not his "family" to me because that drifting away and then blaming him/making fun of him was far from resolved)
yep I'm with you there nonnie. Buck has been the punching bag all season and I'm fucking bored. it seems like basically no one cares about him anymore. like please just. can we drop the whole "firefam" bullshit please it's pretty fucking clear they don't see Buck as family.
he's the only one in season 8 who doesn't get closure. no house, uncertainty in his career, no relationship, no family, not even support for his fucking grief. its fucking boring.
like just, divorced from shipping altogether, Buck has had a SHIT season. here's hoping s9 will be better. if it isn't, well, there's always fic.
The comments are full of people going âitâs not like theyâre having sex in these examples or anythingâ so Iâll go ahead and bite the controversy bullet and add:
Even if a sex worker partner is having sex with clients, itâs also literally just work. It isnât morally wrong. There is nothing wrong with it if both parties in a relationship are aware of the work, and if everyone is being safe.
Sex workers who have sex are no worse or âdirtierâ than sex workers who provide other services.
shipping isnât about what the writers or actors say is or isnât romantic. shipping isnât even about romance a good percentage of the time. shipping is about seeing The Dynamic and going absolutely hog wild in your mind and your friends dms about it.
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Buck unties the apron and hangs it up before uncovering the pot of chili. The scent is exactly the same and, a quick taste test later, is as close to what Bobby used to make as he can get it.
Taking a deep breath, he makes himself smile as he turns around and announces, "Dinner's ready."
"Not hungry, Buck," says Chimney on the couch.
Hen is at the table poring over paperwork. "Thanks, Buck, but I don't know if I have the appetite right now."
Buck swallows down the disappointment. "Right. Okay, uh, I-I'm just gonna leave that on the island. Help yourselves to it when you get hungry."
Gerrard and Eddie walk out of the office at that point and Gerrard sniffs the air. "Buckley, you made dinner again?"
"I've washed the dishes and utensils I used already, sir." Buck keeps his expression as pleasantly neutral as he can. "Would you like some?"
Gerrard harrumphed. "Well, I would. But I'll serve myself.."
After Gerrard takes a bowl and walks back to his office to eat, Eddie wanders over and plops into the chair next to Hen.
"Can't believe you're cooking for that old geezer," Eddie says.
"I'm not cooking for him, I'm cooking for everyone on shift." Buck stirs his chili. The color is rich and the scent decadent. He wants to throw up.
Eddie rolls his eyes. "Well. At least he appreciates it."
"You can have some too," Buck says quietly. "I'm not stopping you from getting a plate."
"Nah. Think I'll just order a burger, I'm gonna head home soon." Eddie stands.
Buck slaps his ladle on the counter.
He doesn't know why he did that. Abruptly, he stands and heads to the kitchen island to grab a dishrag to wipe away whatever mess he made.
"You don't have to be passive aggressive about me eating something else," Eddie says.
A bowstring in the depths of Buck's mind snaps. He grabs the pot of chili and dumps the lot of it, pot and all, into the trash.
He stares at the hours of work he's just discarded, and swallows down the tears before turning around to go downstairs, except the three others are now all standing and staring at him, like he's gone mad.
Maybe he has. Who the fuck cares.
Eddie has his hands on his hip. "What's with the dramatics now, Buck?*
"None of you want it anyway. Why should I bother?" Buck snaps.
"Buck, we just weren't hungry," Chimney starts, but falters when Buck glares at him.
Hen steps closer. "Buck, you didn't have to throw the food away."
"Do you even know what I made?" he demands.
All of them are silent. Buck feels another bowstring break.
"I made chili. Bobby's chili. With his secret ingredient," Buck says. "Hours. Washing, chopping, cooking. No one asked."
"Buck, we were busy," Chimney offers weakly.
"I know, I went out on the same calls as you. I mopped up the bay floors, took inventory, rolled the lines. I did my job and I cooked." Buck gulps down the sour frustration in the back of his throat. "I cooked for us. But I guess I should know better by now."
"You're gonna make it about you again, Buck?" Eddie sounds exasperated. "We've talked about this."
"No, we didn't. You accused me of it, just like you're doing now, and so what if I'm making it about me?" Buck explodes. "Am I not allowed to feel emotions? Am I supposed to just grin and bear it? To let you say those things like they don't hurt?"
The silence that falls over them is deafening.
Buck can't even look at them. "You think I don't know I'm being irrational and obsessive about all this? I don't know what to do! I don't know what to do, and there isn't anyone I can ask, but I am trying! I'm trying and I get no acknowledgement of it. Every time I reach out, you guys just brush me off or, or talk about me behind my back, like I am not mature enough to handle difficult topics. Like I'm a child."
"Buck, that's not -"
"It is, Hen, and you know it is. But I have a duty. I have to... I have to, I have to check in on Chimney, and on you, and I don't even know how to approach Athena but I will have to, and I have, I have to think about, think about how Eddie feels, what he thinks, because otherwise he would hide important stuff from me, his so-called best friend, and he gets angry when I find out even though he's the one hiding secrets, a-and work goes on, and no one eats together anymore, and I'm trying. I am trying so hard to keep the 118 as it was, but I can't do it."
"No one asked you to," Hen says gently, reaching for his shoulder, but Buck bats it away and steps back.
He stares at her bleakly. "Bobby did."
The atmosphere chills about ten degrees. Buck hugs himself. "Bobby told me... He told me I'm gonna be okay. That you guys would need me." He can't stop the tears now but he doesn't care, he's so tired. "But you don't. None of you do. And I don't think I'm gonna be okay, not anymore."
Eddie takes a step forward and Buck backs up. Incredulous, Eddie stares and folds his arms. "And you think any of us are gonna be okay?"
"I didn't say that-"
"So what are you saying? That you're special and your feelings are unique?"
"You weren't here," Buck spits out, cutting Eddie off.
Eddie goes pale and tense. "Buck, don't you throw that in my face-"
"You weren't here when Bobby fired me and took me back into the 118. You weren't here when he showed me that he believed in me. He was... He was the one who guided me through my first real relationship, and he had... He'd..." Buck wishes he could grab someone and point them to all the things Bobby's taught him. "The last thing he said to me... The last thing he said to me, was 'I love you, kid'. He was proud of me and he loved me, which is so much more than my own father ever showed. In every way except for blood, Bobby was my dad. And everything I've done since that night was to prove that... That I could live up to his expectations, but I can't, and I'm sick and tired of having to be okay, when I'm not, of trying to be the one you guys can reach out to, but none of you even have a hand outstretched, and I know I'm not Bobby, I can't be him, but all I wanted was for us to have a meal together, like the family he made us."
Hopelessly aware that he's a blubbering mess, Buck scrubs his palms over his eyes and cheeks before he pushes past Eddie and a silent Hen.
Chimney reaches out to him. "Buck -"
"I'm done, Chimney. You guys eat whatever you want. Do whatever you want. I'm done."
He tears down the steps and runs out of the firehouse. It's not about the chili. It never was about the chili.
But he wishes they had taken some and they could have eaten together.
When Buck and Tommy get married in season 9 (TRUST hehe), I really need them to do a parallel where Maddie plans their wedding like Buck planned hers, and Buck is a complete groomzilla about it. And I really need there to be a scene where she has to fistfight him for his clipboards and finally calls in reinforcements to get him to give them up. "Jee, bite him!"
Maddie manages to wrench the clipboards out of his hands and runs around the house gathering up every binder she finds while Buck is trying to shake Jee off like a puppy attached to his pant leg.
not actually all that good with people @vandulocity - Tumblr Blog | Tumlook
