guess I need a title

tragic: mutual puts a fandom poll on your dash begging you to vote for blorbo bleebus but you know in your heart that the other option, blingus blarbo, is the correct choice. on some judas shit. forgive me brother for you have forced my hand.

What’s funny is that this actually happened. 

I’m unfamiliar with this story please elaborate

Finnish soldier gets separated from the rest of his unit but he’s the only one carrying the emergency amphetamines for the unit, takes too many and goes on a one man rampage for like 2 weeks straight giving the opposing Soviet soldiers nightmares for decades. Oh and he did it all on skis. 

Did he survive?

Yes, during his methed up 2-3 week rampage he got injured by a land mine, travelled 400km on skis, and only ate pine buds and a Siberian Jay that he caught which he ate raw. When he made it back to Finnish lines he was taken to a hospital where it was found his heart rate was nearly 200 beats per minute and his weight had dropped to 43kg (94.7lbs).

Those are the eyes of a man who has seen god and laughed

Those are the eyes of a man who saw satan and asked for his number

Those are the eyes of a man who saw satan and asked for his number Haiku Bot v2021.1~beta I make mistakes. I am buggy too. Sorry! | HAIKU BOT NO! Paypal | Patreon

Haiku bot, babe, you already did this one. Good try though, mate

Thanks for pointing out my visible fuckups, why don’t you eat cheetos flavored popsicle instead of insulting me or my haikus?

HAIKU BOT???

when i was a kid i had moments of being so fucking diabolical because i realized at some point the best way to leverage power over my family was to do shit that would make everybody late

5th grade was the last time I wore a dress for school pictures. When my parents attempted to force the issue for 6th grade, I climbed onto our roof and pulled the ladder up after me. My dad borrowed the neighbors ladder. As soon as it touched the roof I pulled it up too. By the time I had 3 ladders they were willing to negotiate, and 2 hours late for work.

[Image ID: a tumblr tag reading "problems that can be avoided if you simply treat your child as a human being with the right to make decisions on what they wear". End ID]

A lot of you on here sure don’t like the idea of making any kind of sacrifice for the benefit of others huh

Some of you act like doing minor inconvenient acts of kindness is equivalent to donating a kidney as if it’s not those acts that form our communities and make the world go around.

Return your grocery cart. If you’re able-bodied offer your seat to someone who is not. Help your friend move. Drive your sister to the airport. Make sure drunk people have a safe ride or walk home. Pet-sit for your coworker. Participate in a meal train. Volunteer in your area. That’s what friendship and community is about.

tbh it's cruel to tell young girls on here that lesbians and bisexual women don't care about body hair and weight and skin and so on and so forth because they're going to find out it's a lie one way or another. women who are attracted to women are not magically exempt from having patriarchal beauty standards engrained in them and from punishing other women/girls for it and it isn't helping anyone to pretend we are.

such insolence... guards? seize her! ...no. stop. not like that. you are doing it gay. why are you seizing her gay style