Born to Speak all Mirth and no Matter @thirdtimecharmed - Tumblr Blog

the 100% accurate guide to tea leaf reading:

-cup empty: you will need to pee soon

-cup still full of tea: dude i made it for you why aren't you drinking it

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pietriarchy

asexualgeorgecostanza-deactivat

joey-wheeler-official

piss-bong

canopycapers-deactivated2022111

schmendrick-lamar-deactivated20

journeymanfool

dowereallyneedthis

favoritefightingfrenchgoth

disorderfaking-deactivated20200

goofballproximitysurveyor-deact

wilburian-deactivated20221116

great job everyone lets hit the showers

testosteronetwink

pinkthinkspalistineshouldbefree

Not again

cool-way-to-die-deactivated2022

gentle reminder that you can’t get this kind of nonsense from any other site

flavoracle

This thread is almost eight years old and it has damn well earned its place among the Tumblr pantheon as a Heritage Post™️

elisecairo

xsugarxglass

This is some Scooby Doo shit XD

semusepsu

One of my favorite things about Put Baby In Pelican Mouth is that not only does the pelican have the intelligence necessary to speak human language but also knows how to lie, suggesting it has a theory of mind, yet not enough to understand that no one is going to put baby in pelican mouth.

gallusrostromegalus

To be entirely fair to the pelican, I have seen humans do much, much dumber things with their infants. The park rangers in Louisiana ha e to regularly tell people to not put their babies on the ground next to the gators for a pic.

In fact, it could be argued that the peculiar grammar used by the pelican in the Put Baby In Pelican Mouth post is deliberate, like how phishers use major grammar errors in their messages so that people too smart for the scam (or smart enough to report them) ignore the emails and the scammer can focus on the most likely marks.

Regardless, the pelican is right: there is absolutely someone dumb enough to put a baby in its mouth because it asked politely. Probably dozens on that beach alone.

kyraneko

Put baby in pelican mouth for Instagram photo. Facebook photo of baby in pelican mouth for many likes and also happy asleep baby. So cute baby in pelican mouth for video on TikTok. Youtube short of baby so cute in soft pelican mouth for so many views to Youtube channel. Baby in pelican mouth challenge.

pathogenflock

"he would not fucking say that" but about injuries. he would not fucking recover that quickly. those scars would not fucking heal like that. he would not be fucking able bodied after that. he would not be fully lucid after that.

blackforestbride

WHEN HE FALLS FROM A WHAT INTO THE WHAt

blackforestbride

?????????

?????

blackforestbride

WHAT IS GOING ON IN ACE ATTORNEY???

aceattorneygame

Nothing good.

hballegro

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thunderthightning-deactivated20

junk-thunder

I dont remember why I made hmmboob.png but I’m thankful for it every single day

dykecinema

Me: okay I am done talking about this thing that's upsetting me. Bye.

*literally two seconds later*: AND ANOTHER THING

depsidase

theaceofwords

It's called the Global Justice Report, it is here. This is an actionable plan which can be sent to legislators and demanded of political parties. We could save the world within our lifetimes.

It has always been possible. It is still possible.

greelin

can you guys just kill each other in the other room please

#the locked tomb

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vitariesocks

just received the best text message I’ve ever had. from my mom

vitariesocks

2 pics. no caption

freakvampiresex

its nothing some ibuprofen and a blunt and 5 beers and a head injury and jacking off and killing myself cant fix

cinturongazo

i wish cleaning the dishes was more fun. specially the bottles

snowywarmthkuya

beardedmrbean

sometiktoksarevalid

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mynorthernattitude

"listen to your body"

my body: go get a cinnamon roll the size of a tire

deslizada

man sometimes friendship really is just "I saw this and knew it would give you psychic damage. please respond with agony" and then they do. and it's great

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