Fails To Die, Enjoys Breakfast

“Put him on his knees give him something to believe in” has the exact same energy and depth of meaning as anything Hozier puts out on the regular but since it’s sung by Megan Thee Stallion no one takes it seriously. In this essay I will-

To flesh this out a little bit more: both Megan Thee Stallion and Hozier write and sing really sexual songs, but they’re different in that Hozier’s music is typically “let me worship you” while Megan’s is usually “I’m worshipping myself,” which makes all the difference because it’s an acceptance of power rather than the giving of it. He’s the sinner, she’s the saint. However, taking their difference in genres out of it, people don’t usually seem to take Megan Thee Stallion’s music seriously in comparison to Hozier because a) her lyrics are more overtly and blatantly sexual and b)she’s claiming her sexuality for herself, and that scares a lot of people. The secret, no-one-wants-to-talk-about reason is that she’s a confident black woman, which terrifies people way than sex does. In conclusion, Hozier and Megan Thee Stallion are two sides of the same poetic, sexual coin, but people just don’t want to admit it. Which is WHY a collaboration between Hozier and Megan would be so powerful that it would change the timeline as we know it yes I will elaborate 

auto immune disorders happen when the immune system ignores regulatory factors and begins attacking healthy bodily tissues, due to what scientists refer to as "sheer love of the game"

hey boss i can't come in today it's a sunny day and there's a lovely breeze coming in through my window, yeah it's rustling the branches of the tree outside that's finally bloomed so it's pretty serious

If you close your eyes right before the rat hits, your brain will think that you have died. some people find calmness in this.

Encounter: Toronto Baseball Warlock

in the future when I am installed as the stalinist dictator of the soviet states of america I will make government weed a thing the same way they did with government cheese in the 50s. and I genuinely think that would save so so many people's lives tbh

like genuinely I think if the government handed out joints at educational events the way sex ed nonprofits hand out condoms (which should also be free btw) people would drink much less alcohol and avoid more dangerous drugs. people always have and always will do drugs so you might as well give them a drug that is very safe and generally well-tolerated. and instead the drugs that are currently legal are way WAY more dependency-causing and give you fatal cancer, liver failure, or both