Surprise, Bet You Thought You Saw the Last of Me

#‘el pastel promedio tiene tres leches’ es en realidad un error estadístico. El pastel promedio tiene 0 leches. Leches Georg#quien vive en una cueva y absorbe 10.000 leches al día#es un valor atípico qeu no debería haberse contado (via @deathbycoldopen)

I don't speak Spanish but I understand every word

I appreciate 'adn' being preserved in the form of 'qeu', that's absolutely beautiful.

your ligaments

damn girl, your ligaments

Rewatching every season of d20 is just like “I need another season with every member of dropout / college humor that’s ever been featured bc they’re all so good at improv and acting and I need them in more scenarios”

don’t!!! fake!!!! your!!!! interests!!!! to!!!! make!!!! someone!!!! like!!!!! you!!!!

don’t!!! bury!!!! your!!!! interests!!! to!!!!! make!!!! someone!!!! like!!!!! you!!!!

don’t!!! go!!! wasting!!! your!!! emotion!!! lay!!! all!!! your!!! love!!! for!!! me!!!

promise me you'll stay on this site for 10 more years okay?

There is a parallel universe where Tumblr is actually a great functioning site

its exactly as shitty but every other social media site is worse by comparison

you’re sitting across from me in a shitty diner in anywhere, america, and i watch you pour too much creamer in your coffee and i think “i love you.” you look up, catching me staring, and for a moment i think i’m brave enough to say it, but i take too long and the moment passes. i take the balled up straw wraper and flick it at you, pretending that was my plan all along. you laugh. i never want to go another day without hearing that laugh. i think i will have all the time in the world to say it.

op are you okay

yes im married to her now

this is the kind of quality content I expect from the internet

Yeah, my audience will appreciate this.

I feel like some people need to relearn Genre Expectations... "Man, this tragedy sucks!!! Why didn't they just do XYZ, then everything could have ended happily!!" well, then it wouldn't be a tragedy, would it. "Man, this lighthearted teen romcom is terrible, it's so sappy and unrealistic!!" Well, yeah. If it had been gritty and dark, it wouldn't have been a lighthearted romcom, would it. Is the writing actually bad or are you just trying to order a milkshake from a Home Depot

I'm here for "The Most Powerfuck space time machine"

djahajjajw godfuckingdamnit