Alex, Sweetheart of the Internet

Every once in a while I'll get engaged where a piece of media where one character has a highly specific and non-obvious speaking quirk, which I myself don't notice but another fan or friend far more unwell than me will catch onto and inform me of. And then it's like I'm part of the secret true universe and any fan content breaking the rule will, inadvertently and in ways I cannot fault them for, brand themselves an imposter.

Garnet StevenUniverse does not ask questions. Jax TheAmazingDigitalCircus does not curse. Probably 80% of the Homestuck fuckers have some flavor of this but I'm not unwell enough for that.

the more elusive and arcane cousin of "he would not fucking say that"

i hate when apps know that i’m screenshotting something. when i screenshot something, that’s me acting outside your realm of understanding, app. i am beyond what you consider the observable universe. you’re not supposed to perceive me. we don’t know when god screenshots the earth. we don’t know when he’s like, “okay i’m just gonna take a pic in case i ever want to add dinosaurs back to something later and don’t remember how.” and if we did, we wouldn’t act all smug about it like, “hey, you wanna share that post? you could just click here to share it.” no, man. you didn’t catch me. i screenshotted this for my own reasons. what’s next? i can’t take a photo of my computer screen with my phone out of laziness without being shamed by the printer i don’t own?