I'm a realized person now!!!

tinder link in bio.

*tapes scissors to my dick* why won’t anyone fuck me, edward scissordick?

I love going trough the notes every time bc there’s always someone in the notes insisting we’re all mean and that you can just wear thick dish gloves over your fake nails as if I wouldn’t assume you’re going to Patrick Bateman my ass if you walked into the bedroom with claws and yellow rubber gloves

her pussy

OUTTA MY WAY IM BOUT TO GE- ouchie. Ouch. Ouchie.

This they/them is gonna learn how to cook this fall

This they/them is gonna learn how to cook this fall

Nobody should buy GTA til they free Arion Kurtaj

What with GTA VI going up for pre-order i'd just like to remind everyone that rockstar conspired with the UK government to lock an 18-year-old away for life for hacking them.

we need a ritual where you can climb into a hole in the ground for roughly 24 hours and just close your eyes and not do anything, and nobody is allowed to look for you or speak your name, and whenever you want to reemerge then you can climb back out and people are forbidden from commenting on your absence. can someone get on this.

First you procrastinate on the task because it is not a big enough deal to get done urgently. Then you procrastinate on the task because it has become such a big deal that doing it is overwhelming. You would think that this implies a middle point where it is just big enough of a deal to get done easily, however the inherent perversity of the universe's causal geometry prevents this

we need a ritual where you can climb into a hole in the ground for roughly 24 hours and just close your eyes and not do anything, and nobody is allowed to look for you or speak your name, and whenever you want to reemerge then you can climb back out and people are forbidden from commenting on your absence. can someone get on this.

Nobody should buy GTA til they free Arion Kurtaj

What with GTA VI going up for pre-order i'd just like to remind everyone that rockstar conspired with the UK government to lock an 18-year-old away for life for hacking them.

they should let me listen to music while looking out the window of a train for my entire life

YOUR LIFE WILL GET 10X BETTER IF YOU LISTEN TO JAZZ MUSIC