Zocomi

my mom said "yes kissing you is awsome chungus" so i win i think

one like? THIS ONE IS A CERTIFIED ZOCOMI BANGER

*inserting new RAM into my 10 year old motherboard* "Shhh... hey, hey! It's okay girl. I didn't mean to startle you. I know it's been a little while. I've got a nice little treat for you here, okay? It's going to help you run smoother. There now, see? That wasn't so bad. I'm sorry girl. I didn't realize how much stress I've been putting you under, streaming Elden Ring with only 8 GB of memory... No wonder you're having trouble with Baldur's Gate 3. You've been doing so good though. I know you'll probably have to go soon, but we still got a few good years left. Hopefully this will help ease any pain you've been feeling. I'm going to put the cover back on the case now, okay? I love you."

working with hydraulics makes me feel like such a slut...what do you mean I need to "crack" your bleeder....oh now you're "leaking all over the place" and I'm "covered in oil".....like good girl yes extend your piston for me

so. i just learned that my entirely me-written resume flags as being AI-written by automated HR systems for a few writing quirks and the fact that i followed all the rules of good resume writing, which is apparently a telltale sign of AI use in this fucking hellworld. i've been desperately applying to jobs that i am massively overqualified for for months with no response, not even an interview, and now i find out that at least part of the reason is because some fucking moron decided that following the rules every career advisor has given me for a decade means i cheated and should be disqualified. the ai bubble cannot pop soon enough. what the actual fuck.

"frequent use of action-result sentences. bullet points all start with action verbs. no career gaps." girl what the fuck are you talking about. that's just resume writing advice being followed. i just did what i was told. it's a fucking resume. you're supposed to do all that stuff. what the fuck do you mean it looks ai generated and wouldn't pass basic detection systems?????????? for following the resume writing rules????????????

wishing every AI bro and ceo a very [REDACTED]

“I just need to learn how to seem more normal and they’ll leave me alone,” she thought, lacking any ability to understand why the boys they said were her peers seemed to hate her from the moment they met her

Patriarchal society teaches boys to hate girls and believe it or not being a girl involuntarily sorted into boys spaces can very often mean being seen as an acceptable (and even deserving) target for that prejudice

Marking you green on shinigami eyes for posting about wanting to kill dogs

Marking you red for talking about your boyfriend

Of course no heuristic is universally true, but I think if you're an american who considers themselves "progressive" this is a rule of thumb you should probably be considering more often: If the conversation you're currently participating in is only able to happen because someone is going out of their way to speak *your* language, that's probably not the person who's most in need of informing themselves about the other's country in this conversation.

happy fourth of july to the philippines ONLY

happy june 12 to you

tragic! trans person no longer merely tolerating the act of existing just now realising their entire wardrobe is ass

It is wild how confident these Owners often are. Please Gordon Ramsay tell me why my restaurant is failing, wait what the fuck do you mean it's my decisions and the way I do things? Suck my cock, you know nothing about REAL food, you pretentious fuck.

as a feminist i think girls should suck each other’s tits more