Zocomi

Disappointingly, the more time a person has spent around cis feminists or AFAB-centric "feminists" (I'm not sure why they still call themselves feminists because like okay if it's not about women and it's not about femininity then what exactly is it about, guys?), the more likely they are to have some kind of complex rationalization for treating us not as a woman, but as a third sex at best, without using that terminology.

So-called feminists often talk about AFAB socialization like it's this panacea that makes someone inherently virtuous and incapable of harm, and it just ain't so.

A lot of people learn covert aggression, manipulation, and how to weaponize apparent vulnerability with their chestmilk or formula. They learn how to wear a mask of assigned-female innocence while lashing out at whomever their egos feel threatened by.

And so, as a trans woman, I feel like I'm completely encircled by oppression:

Right-wing transphobes

TERFs

Liberals/leftists who reframe women's systemic oppression in terms of assigned sex at birth only, and scold trans women for "exceeding their station" like a haughty 18th-century aristocrat

And unfortunately, there are a LOT of people in category #3. They deny, they rationalize, but they always tell on themselves with their behavior.

They use our pronouns, but they expect us to pay when going out.

They tolerate us in the bathroom, but they scold us for shining too brightly on a stage or dance floor.

They perform polite feminine social gestures like complimenting outfits, but they roll their eyes and say we're overreacting when we're sexually assaulted.

They're grown-ass adults, they stopped using the word "princess" long ago, and they'll talk your ear off about equality, but they still expect to be treated as more equal than others. And if you point this out, they play out the classic vulnerable narcissist scripts of triangulation, gaslighting and victim-play.