C R I N G E

they hate me because im evil and unlikeable

Send help I’ve been laughing for 15 minutes the internet killed my sense of humor

I was expecting exactly that and was not disappointed

staring at the dessert menu and twirling my hair and going "should I be baaaaddd" until the autistic girl I'm eating with says "there is nothing bad about eating dessert. it is a morally neutral action"

so funny how the older u get ur like how the fuck on gods green earth did people used to manage all th- ahhh.. i need one of these wives everybody keeps talking about..

"how was X so successful and productive and achieving?" wife feeding and clothing and cleaning and shopping and parenting for them and also probably booking appointments and personal receptionist work. AND stimulant abuse. and shes supposed to suck you off whenever. id kill him too #feminists

eat an entire can of sweetened condensed milk. you deserve it.

(sigh) okay... (CRUUEEENNNCH....) (SCREEEEEENCH...) owie.. (CRUUEEENCH)

this is one of the most rewarding things about posting self care tips on this site. witnessing people's lives getting better in real time. this is why I post

do you ever want to gently float up to someone and whisper “this isn’t a debate; i am actually educated on the subject and i’m telling you you’re wrong”

Yes and I would also like to gently float in general.

this is the most positive addition that has ever been made on my post

Im your lolcow and i love you

great minds think of dykes

Ghosts aren't real, it was probably just the house settling that gave you that blowjob

SEE HER FABULOUS!!!

is high jump kicking peoples dogs punk

no, to punk is to love

I love to high jump kick peoples dogs

won’t a high jump kick miss most dogs? they’re usually kinda low to the ground

I hope I'm online when it happens. I want to see a sudden flood of crab rave memes right after refreshing my dash, and in the middle of it all, the Castiel news meme. That's how I want to learn of it; not through anything solemn or serious, but via overwhelming silly celebration.