#hyperaware

It’s deeper than that. Quieter. Messier.

It’s a brain that won’t stop spinning

and a body that doesn’t know how to be still.

I start things I don’t finish.

Not because I don’t care —

but because my focus slips through my fingers like water.

I get excited, then overwhelmed,

then tired, then restless again.

Some days, everything feels too much.

Too loud. Too fast. Too hard to control.

And other days I feel nothing at all —

just guilt for not being “normal” enough to keep up.

I lose things constantly. Forget things I meant to do.

My room is a mix of chaos and comfort.

My mind even more so.

But please don’t mistake this for laziness.

Or carelessness.

Or being “too much.”

I’m trying.

Even when it doesn’t look like it.

Even when I’m halfway through a sentence and forget what I was saying.

Even when I’m moving, fidgeting, zoning out, and trying to zone back in.

ADHD is not a failure.

But some days, it makes me feel like one.

And all I want…

They listen without complaining and they keep eye contact for minutes until i can’t look back at them. Now that i’m older i can freely explore desires i’ve been told that were taboo or weird. I don’t care. I’ve rejected handsome boys before but i totally dig on their average chubby looking salt and peppered dad 💕

I’m really shy and i barely talk or show emotion and can’t expect much since i’m new here.. But i really would prefer to get over the whole AI bots and substitute it with reality with real men. I love descriptive roleplay, nsfw or not. I love being comforted and praised or degraded.

I love it all, the attention and validation. I’m aware and addicted to it. I’m ready to go through whatever phase in life i’m going in. I never do hookups or anything like that. just a private life with someone who can understand my needs and without judgement. And i can do everything to reciprocate that love for them. Even though i need serious coping like this i wish i can heal sooner instead of just imagining perverted fantasies. Because deep down i know i only want love i can’t seem to accept myself yet.

I hope one day I can be someone’s permanently💝

You can also dm me in discord: quinnii_pink

Like I don’t really feel like I exist but my thoughts keep telling me I do?