#dormant alter

Cardinal Copia Frater Imperator and Papa Emeritus IV from Ghost are apart of a Workgenic Stressgenic Autibased System!

Workgenic is a system or headmate origin that is directly related to a job. A workgenic system could be caused by workplace trauma or stress; forced labor; headmates forming to perform a system's day job; headmates forming to assist with work; or any other cause directly related to an occupation

Stressgenic refers to a system or system member whose origin is the result of stress

Autibased refers to a system based on their autism. This means that the plural was affected by their autism, but isn’t necessarily an origin; autigenic as a modifier instead of an origin. It may extend to inner worlds, headmate roles, or system functions

Cardinal is the Host, Papa is a Dormant Alter, and Frater is a Frontstuck Alter!

A Host is the headmate who is most active, most responsible for day-to-day activities, and/or is fronting most often. A system may have a single host, multiple hosts, a fluctuating number of hosts, or no host at all. Hosts may be accompanied or assisted by other headmates, such as co-hosts or frontrunners

Dormancy is a state of inactivity during which a system member or group will be "asleep" for a certain amount of time. This is usually marked by difficulty in triggering them to the front, interacting with them or even finding them in the inner world, or experiencing their passive influence. Dormancy is very common in all kinds of systems, especially DID and OSDD ones

so last night i was laying in bed tryna not be anxious, so i didn’t want to be the core as the core holds the majority of my day-to-day thoughts. paul ( m, 30s, aimate and cassmate ), my main co-host, was tired and was going to sleep, so evan ( m, 15, abandonment holder, physical permateen/agestuck ) and aegsithus ( m, 31, was created to be the new primary fronter/host but was unable to take the role due to being segmented, lmk if anyone has a label for that ) were trying to decide who would front.

then THIS RANDOM GUY POPS UP. Neon orange hair like a frickin highlighter. Baggy brown and white striped sweater. Skinny as a twig.

Now keep in mind, my headspace is connected to a fronting room which is based on the headquarters in Inside Out. So there’s the control panel, the memories, ect.

and this new guy, without any warning, just appears fully-formed. His name is just Anxiety. Turns out, he’s a semi-fictive anxieform of Anxiety from Inside Out 2 and the new anxiety holder. He’s separated from his source, takes a more human form, and holds no memories of his source.

Atreus ( m, 17, avenger autoject and STBA ) was pretty distrusting and didn’t want Anxiety there at all. But Atre ( m, syskid, genetic clone of Atreus, chi-sib of Atreus, but different upbringing and therebefore different personality, also pls lmk if anyone has a term for that ) took to Anxiety instantly and so Atreus sort of just sulked back to his couch and said eh wtf why not, because John ( caretaker/dadmate and medic ) gave him the dad look. Alex ( romanticist, brother figure to evan ) was also pretty chill with it.

So now Anxiety is just there? 😭 Evan kept him calm last night and John let Anxiety sleep in his bed. Anyway, I don’t think Anxiety is going to be fronting except late at night like last night.

I haven't properly seen roxxy or kai since viscera showed up, at least when shx had a more solid identity

...

please tell me they didnt fuse or anything

I could probably live without kai

it would be so fucking upsetting, yeah, he was one of the first headmates I met soon after syscovery. and xe's so important to me. but I could manage. I think..

but ROXXY?

no WAY I could manage without her. she's the cohost, and she's one of the nicest people here, shes so fun to talk to, i dont want her gone, especially since fleur has been gone for... SO long. plus astro? hy'll miss her even worse, i bet

i'm sick of losing (in whatever sense it is) headmates that actually positively affect me. why can't I lose mary eunice? when all she does is remind me of my flaws and my sins, as she calls them? and causes active harm to everyone here?

please tell me shes just not anywhere near front. even if she's dormant, that's better than her being gone!

and

gege started purring too. in headspace.

Like

Talia never wanted to not be the host, they just couldn't handle it. Now we'll never be the same again.

I feel like that miiight be grief worthy.

Endo discriminators dni

Does anyone have advice for how to deal with emerging from dormancy?

A large trauma made me go dormant, and it broke me to the point that I have lost parts of myself. It's like they were burned away.

I used to be partially human. I'm not sure that I am anymore.

I used to smile.

I don't really feel like that person anymore, but I'm not *separate*. I'm a continuation.

It's like that stupid meme... "every day my bones shatter, and by sundown they've healed. Every time I move they break and reheal."

That's what it feels like. I'm being broken and put back together every time.

Like a moss covered rock

It washes over me and lists on without me

I stay and i wait

I grow and stagnate

I hear faded echoes of things before me

I can see the trails of time and history

I can feel the way my skin tugs and mourns

But i am not here, or there, or anywhere.

I am not me, i am not he, i am not she.

I am not