You remember all the blood, right? Down in that mine. He died because of you. You didn’t care enough about him, you let him walk ahead. You would never have allowed that with others. But you didn’t care about him. You remember that dull noise, his coughing, the way the life left his grey eyes as he looked so desperately to you. It is all on you. You can’t save anyone.
It would only take a startle, the usual whining noises that came from Leon. Luis didn’t know what haunted him - but his arms already wrapped around his carino tighter, pulling him closer. Little kisses were placed on his shoulder and fingers trailing over his back.
“It’s okay, mi amor. You’re safe.”
Leon is haunted, again, by his mistakes. No one punishes him better than his own mind. He obsesses over the details, a silent form of self-flagellation that leaves behind mental scars. That cruel and critical voice creeps back into his psyche. It sounds so much like Krauser, then it morphs, slowly bleeding to become his own voice.
He's reliving the mines under Salazar's castle. He knows what comes next. His entire arm flexes, bicep bulging as he closes his hand into a painful fist, nails biting into his own calloused skin as his mouth hangs open around a silent cry. Small, pathetic sounds escape the trained agent. In his dream state he's frozen in place and unable to stop it. Again. He screams and he thrashes but Luis cannot hear him, and he cannot move. History repeats, only crueller.
That time, Luis didn't get back up. He died down there.
That pain jolts him. He's half-conscious as he draws a ragged breath that wracks into a sob. He breathes like he's in a state of panic. He can smell Luis. There are arms around him, holding him. He doesn't mean to, but he grips on a little too tight, the kind of desperate hold that will leave a mark or a bruise. Another moment before he's fully pulled back into reality.
"L-L.. y-.." Leon can't even speak. His hold eases completely, fingers flexing to become an open palm as she sobs out freely. His hand reaches to Luis' face like that, ghosting over his cheek, tremoring. He doesn't dare to hold him. Just curls over to press his face into Luis chest where he cries his heart out as though he just stepped out of the funeral.
