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Ilya then has the rest of the Centaurs help him make a compilation of secretly filmed Shane moments showing how good a boyfriend he is

Ilya doing the “would you still love me if I was a worm?” thing and without missing a beat or asking any questions Shane just goes “Yeah”

Harris films himself asking Shane random Ilya questions and Shane always having an answer. “Hey what Ilya’s favorite milkshake flavor?” “Mint.” “I’m buying everyone fun socks, what’s Ilya’s favorite color?” “Blue, but only if it’s light, he doesn’t like dark blue.” “What’s Ilya’s favorite fruit?” “Pears.”

Troy waits for Shane to sit on the bench looking at his phone or tying his skates then says “Oh hey Ilya’s coming in” and catches multiple examples of Shane immediately scootching over to one side to make room for Ilya to sit next to him

Ilya puts his feet up on Shane’s lap silently and Shane starts lightly massaging them. Ilya lays his head on Shane’s shoulder and Shane starts quietly playing with his hair

They film Ilya handing Shane random things and asking him to hold them and Shane does without question. The internets favorite is the one where Ilya pulls a pineapple out of his bag and asks Shane to hold it and he agrees, getting his gear on one handed so he can keep holding the pineapple in the other

Shane: *sounds progressively more Russian during a conversation*

Ilya, thinking Shane’s making fun of him: that fucking asshole?

Ilya: neveroyatnyy

Shane, whispering in a perfect Russian accent: ✨neveroyatnyy✨

Ilya, clearly wasn’t supposed to hear that: ????!!

Ilya drops several Russian curses while they fuck once, and Shane just moans them right back. (Maybe Ilya fucks Shane three ways to Sunday afterward, and maybe he starts speaking Russian more during sex, but that is NO ONE’S business!)

Shane speaking to JJ during warm-ups: *unconsciously copying his accent*

Ilya, eavesdropping: No, that’s our thing >:(

Shane has genuine difficulty staying quiet and not echoing when Ilya gives his monologue over the phone, but he thinks it would upset Ilya if he did. (And Ilya will never admit it, but each time he said “I love you” in Russian, he hoped Shane would say it back in his little echo, even if he knew Shane didn’t mean it. (He would.))

Shane in the hospital, high as a kite, in a Russian accent: bye bye :)

Ilya, heart eyes 15000%: fuck this, fuck you, nurse I am having heart attack

lvl 2: the plural version of octopus is octopi because if a word ends with "us" the plural version replaces the "us" with "i" e.g. cactus -> cacti and fungus -> fungi

lvl 3: actually, that rule is only for latin words. octopus is a greek word and the correct plural is octopuses or octopodes

lvl 4: actually, language is descriptive not prescriptive. since enough people over time have used octopi as the plural for octopus, it's a valid plural

which also leads to the very funny moment of the twins bringing their "captive" to king shane for judgement of his crimes and shane not even lowering his sunglasses and going "off with his head"

ilya is just D:< you will not even TRY to argue clemency?? for your HUSBAND???

"sir ruby, what are his crimes?"

"smashing the village and eating ALL the villagers >:D"

No accusations can be made about them throwing games for each other, because there are several videos of them being super competitive about absolutely nothing. For example, one of the dumped files is a video of the two playing Monopoly (filmed discretely from a hallway). They look about ready to murder each other. And then, off-screen, Yuna's voice - in a Mom Voice TM, of course - calls, "Boys, you better not be doing what I think you are!"

Ilya says, "Nyet, Mama," at the same time Shane says "No, Mom!" And in perfect sync they hide evidence of the game, not a single movement between them wasted.

There's also a video of them trash talking each other for being slow as they race to put away the most clean dishes from the dishwasher.

It's a whole genre. Play-fighting as they bring out a measuring tape to literally measure who shoveled the most snow from the driveway, bringing up hockey stats as they argue over who deserves to hold the tv remote, etc.

Only 48 hours left before we confirm final quantities with the manufacturer and begin production! Visit the shop if you want your order included! Limited edition!

16 embroidery patches for the following pride flags: asexual, aromantic, rainbow, bisexual, lesbian, gay, non-binary, transgender, demisexual, and genderfluid.

Genitals are not a concern for him, it’s the energy and physicality of a person. It’s their sense of humour and how they carry themselves and how they can give as good as they get.