Yeah, weird, I know

I greeted him back. “Sort of,” I said, rubbing the grogginess from my eyes. It still weirded me out to have him there when I slept and woke. But we’d accepted each others’ culture. “Culture” was like playing a trump card for determining our living arrangements. 

I rolled out of bed and floated towards the dorms. “Coffee,” I said to the open air. The robotic arm appeared and handed me a pouch of liquid. It was nice to have a routine, even if there was no morning out in space. 

Once I got ready for the “day,” I headed up towards the lab, Rocky scuttling through the tunnels and pulling himself along with the rails. I had grabbed a chunk of xenonite from Rocky’s supply surplus downstairs. He assured me there was plenty to spare and that the materials cluttered in the bottom of my ship were only a fraction of his supply remaining on the Blip A. 

I’d messed with the xenonite when Rocky first came over, but I wanted to do some more testing. Maybe some other tools could make a dent in it, or I could gauge its influence on the stuff I did have. I gently pulled open a drawer, careful not to send any of the instruments floating in the cabin. They were always a pain to chase down and reorganize. I learned my lesson from the last time we left gravity. 

“What is Grace doing, question?” Rocky asked. 

“Well, I hit this stuff with a chisel last time and it didn’t make a dent. But I wanted to see if there was anything else I could do with Earth materials to affect the xenonite.” 

Rocky paced side to side, pondering. “Fire damage xenonite. Earth has fire.” 

I knew he was just trying to be helpful, but the suggestion was frustrating. I already figured that from the torches he used in assembling his rooms. The fact that the impossible material withstood anything I threw at it puzzled me. 

“Why sad face, question?”

“No, I’m not sad,” I shook my head. “I’m thinking. If I think really hard, sometimes it looks like I’m frowning.” For an alien, he was very observant of human emotions. 

Rocky clicked his claws together, his carapace lowering slightly as he relaxed. “Understand.” 

Xenonite was completely inert, but I could at least see how other materials interacted with this foreign one from a physical standpoint. I pulled out a pack of chalk and opened it, retrieving a stick. Simple calcium carbonate, a very familiar material. 

I rubbed it across the surface. Xenonite was so smooth, it didn’t cause any chunks to break off, instead leaving an incredibly fine layer across the material. When I rubbed my thumb across it, it left the surface completely unmarred, no trace of chalk remaining. With this xenonite stuff, chalkboards could make a comeback. 

I rubbed my fingers together, trying to get rid of the chalk. And then I immediately remembered why that was a terrible idea in zero gravity. When I inhaled, the chalk dust floated up my nostrils. I coughed, waving a hand in front of my face to clear the powder away, but it was too late. 

After months of breathing in ultra-purified ship air, the tiny particles from the chalk felt like an assault on my nostrils. On Earth, I was used to the air pollution, and a bit of chalk would have been unnoticeable. I didn’t realize how sensitive my nose had become in space. 

The itch to sneeze was unbearable, but I didn’t want to deal with the… mess that might float around as a result. I gasped, fighting the urge. 

“What is wrong, question?” Rocky asked, moving between his bars a bit frantically. 

I shook my head slightly, unable to speak. I held up one finger to Rocky while keeping the other pressed against the underside of my nose. 

Rocky remembered exactly what that one raised finger meant and slowed his pacing, still tilting forward in anticipation and puzzlement. 

Unfortunately for me, it seemed like I might not have a choice in the sneezing matter. I pinched my nose, but if anything, the forceful touch antagonized it. I doubt being gentler would have made a difference, though. “Hihh-! H-HEH’nNGHXX-guh!” 

Rocky hummed a follow-up question, still concerned. 

I blinked back tears. I guess the little guy had never heard me sneeze before. It certainly wasn’t something an Eridian would need to do, with their bodies designed to be completely self-contained. 

“It’s called a sneeze,” I answered. And it was the least satisfying sneeze I’d ever experienced in my entire life. Now my nose was itchy and leaky and stuffy. “Nothing’s wrong, humans do it automatically to get irritants out of their nose.” 

“Chalk is irritant!” He put it together now. “But you hold nose closed, question?” 

He had a good point. It defeated the purpose, and I probably wouldn’t get anywhere like this. 

“B-because,” I stammered. My breath caught as the urge to sneeze started to overpower me. I glanced around the room, looking for a cloth or tissues, but everything was stowed away. Curse my foresight to be tidy. I couldn’t even remember where the Kimwipes were kept. “Noses have… ha–EH’hNGCH! Heh’mpch!” I wasn’t giving up yet. 

“Noses have mucus inside to protect it. And I don’t want it to g-gehh.. get all over my lab.” 

Darn, this was getting really annoying. I could feel another one building. There would probably be something useful in the storage bins, or I could start tearing apart drawers, but I could barely focus through the hitching.

Rocky pondered the information. “Nose hold isn’t working,” he observed. Again, helpful. 

“Hehh’mNGXt!’ The itch in my nose was starting to go from mildly irritating to almost burning, which was even more uncomfortable. It seems like I might not have a choice at this point. I dropped my hand and quickly raised the neckline of my jumpsuit, pressing it tightly over my nose. “Oh god…heh Hyihh’CSHhuh! Hh’EHCHhmph! Heh…ngGCHOO!” 

Ugh. I kept the collar against my face, sniffling thickly. Not very dignified, but it did a pretty good job at containment. 

“Noses are strange. They smell and make humans explode. Weird.” 

I rolled my eyes, then blinked. “HYEH’ZCHHioo!” I might have to keep the makeshift mask over my nose until the ship cycled out the air. 

“You know, on Earth, the polite thing to say when someone sneezes is ‘bless you.’” Another bit of human culture for him to analyze and question. I pushed off the lab bench in search of some Kleenex.