Ramblings Of A Slutty Asexual Edwardian Poet

3 things I like about Jax: she’s lovely, isn’t she?

1. She’s so funny, honestly even with some of the more mean-spirited things lol e.g. I’m huge fan of “oh, cool! 0-0 I’m not a vegan anymore! [CHOMPS evil version. THRASHES AROUND.]”

2. Something about her voice is So Audio to my brain. I think it’s the way she sounds constantly smirky. Just the intonation of it makes the DVD logo hit all the corners of my brain in a row

3. I really, really like her backstory with Ribbit and Kaufmo. 🥺 The arc of seeing them become friends, the scene in Ribbit’s room, Jax shutting Ribbit out until she abstracts, Jax drifting away from Kaufmo until he abstracts—it’s emotionally devastating but also really interesting and compelling to me lol. And then in the finale, all three of them are a trio again as abstractions in the tank 😭😭

4. I love the character design of like she doesn’t really have an inside of her mouth, like her teeth aren’t actually 3D they’re just painted onto her head, for lack of the right term. It’s just the shape of her mouth moving around the base layer of her head. Kind of hard to phrase actually lmao but yeah!!

3 snz/adjacent hcs:

1. Does not bless anyone unless it’s done teasingly/mockingly lol. If she’s blessed by someone else, it’s often followed with a weary “ugh, shut up,” particularly if she’s sick and has been sneezing a lot (she’s tired and yeah yeah she heard you the first 20 times today). However, if she Doesn’t get blessed, she will occasionally be like, “What, no ‘bless you?’”

2. How do I put this, maybe her snz sounds like it’s through her teeth because it kind of is lol? And it’s not very loud but sounds wet, vocal, tensed, and a little harsh? “Y”s and “J”s in there? Maybe like, “uhh-huhh… hih’YKZSCHh! EHJZSH’hyeww! Ugh...” I could also see her playing up a more stereotypical cartoony vibe.

3. Hates admitting illness, allergies, or maybe even sensitivities. Weaknesses?? She doesn’t have Those! And she’s certainly not jumping to tell people them. She’s neverrrr tried to deny things to herself of any kind either. Tooootally wouldn’t do that with illnesses and allergies too.

3 snz/adjacent prompts or scenarios:

1. In the past, Jax getting sick and Ribbit taking care of her!! Maybe in more subtle/casual ways so as not to freak her out about being too vulnerable. More so just an “are you sure you’re feeling all right?” “Well, yeah, why wouldn’t I be? C’monnn, Ribbit, you worry too much! I’m the picture of hehhh… hehH-YDJZSH’hiew! Sndf, picture of health.” “Uh-huh. Sure. I’m completely convinced now… Bless you.” “Yeah, yeah, shut up… it’s nothing, all right?” “Hey, I’m not saying it’s ‘something.’ I’m just saying… I hear hot chocolate’s pretty nice on a sore throat. Now, totally unrelated to that fun fact, I’m going to go get some. You wanna join me?” “… Eh, why not?” “That’s what I like to hear!” There’s something kind of healing about feeling safe with Ribbit when a little vulnerable since Jax didn’t have that at home 😭😭

2. If one of the characters gets into a snz while hiding situation during an adventure, Jax causes problems on purpose LMAO. Or at least makes them Worse on purpose, e.g. oh nooo she accidentally bumped into some more items in this dusty closet what a shame, literally she knocks some shit over and goes “o o p s : )” (because she’s cringe (affectionate)) and then talks about how much dust is in the air now and y’know the other character probably shouldn’t think about that too much given how terribly allergic they are to it, etc.

3. In the past when Jax was newer to the Circus or up until like ep 7, she turns out to be awfully allergic to some flora/fauna that’s necessary to complete the adventure they’re on and is sort of everywhere. She tries to hide it/play it cool and somehow avoid it, buuut inevitably falls apart in front of the group (or just one person like Ribbit or Pomni!) with an absolutely record-breaking sneezing fit. And it’s Very obvious what’s been going on.

Muriel———

3 things I like about them:

1. They’re ADORABLE omfg my baby my baby my baby. They’re so sweet and they try so hard to do a good job. My little inspector constable 😭🥹 I LOVE an inhuman character who doesn’t know much human/Earth stuff. 2. I love their dynamics with Zira and Crowley!! Baby angel + much more worldly angel and fallen angel!! Hell yeah!!! 3. Honestly, their looks/outfits, including the demon disguise in season 3, like!! Very Shaped and also I kind of want their gender.

3 snz/adjacent hcs:

1. They ALWAYS bless people after they sneeze, no matter how many times it happens. Sometimes, they get a little too eager and bless them beforehand, which may or may not distract the person from actually sneezing. This is one of their favorite quirks with humans and blessing every snz makes them feel like they’re Doing A Good Job As An Angel And At Interacting With Humans. They bless themself too. They have blessed Crowley and it only made him snz more, so they blessed him again, and Aziraphale had to break the cycle.

2. Hitches are soft and it’s often two with the second higher in pitch. Their sneezes are on the quiet side and just sound ticklish, not harsh at all. Might sound like “hih-hih!… Ihht’shhiew! Oh, my, ble-hhess—hihdt’tschh! Mnguh, bless me.”

3. When they or someone else falls ill with a human cold/flu, they bounce back and forth between anxiously overthinking (because they don’t Know so?? Are they going to be okay?? They’re not going to suffer, right? 🥺) and super excited to learn more. They want to ask so many questions and check in with the sick person constantly and get Zira, Crowley, or an angelic higher-up’s advice on the matter.

3 snz/adjacent prompts or scenarios:

1. During season 2, Aziraphale or Crowley catch a cold. Muriel is over at the bookshop Inspecting and gets very curious about human illnesses, asking a million questions. The healthy one has to balance taking care of the sick one AND explaining things to Muriel and No No No Keep Your Distance Omg. The next day, the healthy one has caught it, bonus points if it’s because Muriel distracted them and being careful with contagion slipped their mind for a moment. Muriel is back and full of somehow more questions than the day before. The day after that, Muriel shows up again, sick with their cold and not sure what to do about it. Aziraphale and Crowley have to manage taking care of each other AND Muriel, who’s so new to this and needs explanations and reminders and reassurance that they’ll be okay and instructions, while also being sick themselves.

2. Muriel discovers they’re allergic to some Earth flora or fauna. At first, they assume that thing/animal just makes EVERYONE get all sniffly and sneezy, sort of like how spicy foods affect everyone. Then, when they’re corrected by Aziraphale and/or Crowley, they’re FASCINATED. Excited!! What do you mean this is a rare effect that they’re experiencing?? Well, that needs to be studied and taken notes on! (The others try to tell them it’s already well documented, but they don’t fully have the heart to try to spoil their fun.) If one wanted, one could kink!Muriel this.

3. Muriel wants to help with the bookshop and has been assigned a simple task that Jim had been doing: dusting. It does not go fully as planned. They don’t even really have dust in Heaven because it’s too perfect and immaculate. There’s a brief moment when Aziraphale or Crowley explains that it’s just their new corporeal form trying to rid itself of irritants in the air that Muriel gets concerned because wait what do you mean there’s??? Something dangerous in the air??? Should they not be breathing??? Corporeal forms NEED to breathe though right??? And they’re quickly reassured that it’s reeeeeally not that serious lol.

4. Bonus one that actually could be added onto any of the above arguably: Muriel gets curious about the corporeal reflex of sneezing and asks Aziraphale and/or Crowley for a list of what causes it. They then proceed to experiment with all those things and take notes on the results. If one wanted, could kink!Muriel.

Aziraphale———

3 things I like about him: his husband

1. DORKKKK FUCKING DORK LOSER DORK I wuv him. “I could entertain~! :D” LOOOSER cute cute loser dork nerd loser dork. Loves his own aesthetic way too much with his tartan and lil bow tie and bookshop and everything. 😭🤍 He takes such joy in a lot of things and I wuv him he goes “oH that was sCrUmPtIoUs” after eating what a huge dork

2. I love it when he’s a little bit bitchy lmao or when he has Very High Standards for things. It’s Ineffable! Look at the state of this coat! You’ve lost the child -> a child has been lost (and there was 0 fault on my part ofc). Changes Crowley’s car for the s2 trip because it’s prettyyyy.

3. It’s a REALLY good performance from Michael Sheen holy fuck. I LOVE when he goes 🥰 HE MAKES THAT E X A C T FACE. I love his lil mannerisms and the hands tucked behind his back. Lil face scrunches. The sadder parts hit so well like aughhhhhh the delivery of “go off… together…? 🥺” HAUNTS me

3 snz/adjacent hcs:

1. If he’s annoyed with Crowley and in a bitchy mood, he might “forget” that blessing him makes him sneeze lol.

2. Bundles 👏 UP 👏 when sick. Soft sweater, cardigan, blanket, he is WARM and COZY, bitch. Albeit sometimes he overshoots with that and regretfully has to take one of those things off because he’s sweating and it’s probably not good for that fever of his. But until he overshoots, he loves tea by the fireplace or reading curled up in bed.

3. Wants to believe that he’s too Ethereal to easily fall to human illnesses or even to be allergic/sensitive to anything on Earth. This has been disproven on several counts several times and Crowley is more than willing to remind him of that, but he still wants to believe that he’s at least 99.9% infallible to those things

4. When he’s sick, sometimes he asks Crowley to read to him because he’s so invested in this book, but he’s too tired and headachy to keep his eyes open.

3 snz/adjacent prompts or scenarios:

1. Aziraphale and Crowley go to an area of Earth that they haven’t been to in like hundreds or thousands of years. It turns out that Aziraphale is allergic to some flora that’s now there. He tries to deny for aforementioned Ethereal vibes, buuuut it’s obvious and Crowley is both teasing him for not wanting to admit it AND taking care of him a little (gets him away from the allergen, Don’t Touch Your Face, I can go get you meds, etc.)

2. Aziraphale brings Crowley to a baking/cooking class with him, maybe even making cinnamon rolls because he IS one. 🥰 There’s an Incident with the cinnamon or spice, aaand now Aziraphale is woefully distracted from the task at hand because he just can’t stop sneezing for the life of him. He’s embarrassed because it’s public, and Crowley’s just trying to help and subtly miracle him a handkerchief and the like. If there’s any potential for mishaps with angelic powers, then that’s an Ordeal.

Alastor———

3 things I like about him:

1. God, I love his stupid little radio filter. It’s so very Audio, and I love to see when he drops it or intensifies it in some way.

2. He’s so silly, your honor. He has WAYYYY too much fun with that stupid chair lmaoo. He loves his own aesthetic way too much. “Radio’s not dead, but it is ending this broadcast” DORKKK (affectionate)

3. His dynamics with other characters are SO fun!! I’m Unwell over his dynamic with Vox throughout the years, his dynamic with Charlie is really interesting and I’m excited to see where it goes, LOVE him with Rosie and I really hope they are/can be real friends now that his deal’s broken, obviously he’s amazing with Niffty, he’s super fun with Lucifer, he’s fun with Husk, he’s fun with Pentious, he’s fun with Angel, he’s fun with Vaggi, he’s fun with Carmilla—he just has really fun dynamics with Everyone and I love seeing him interact with them

3 snz/adjacent hcs:

1. Hates loud noises when sick. Everyone shut up. He has a headache. Leave him alone and be quiet. His big fwuffy ears are a bit sensitive.

2. It’s kinda funny to give him dog allergies due to how he died LMAOO like clearly Hell has a bit of a sense of humor with how his body ended up anyway, though he could’ve had them already anyway

3. Pissed off about congestion/a runny nose fucking up his diction. Rule #1 of being a radio host is to speak clearly lol and now his words are all muddled?? In a way that’s kinda pitiful?? Hates it.

3 snz/adjacent prompts or scenarios:

1. Alastor is sick and loses his voice. He is, to put it lightly, Not Very Pleased with that. He tries to hide it from everyone (hotel cast, Husk and/or Niffty in the past, Rosie at any point in the timeline, Vox in the past or present) for as long as possible and tries to fix it ASAP. Inevitably, someone finds out.

2. While he’s Vox’s prisoner in s2, he gets sick in some stupid way and it’s unintentionally Vox’s fault. E.g. Vox dunks him in SHOK.WAV’s tank (and barely pulls him out before SHOK chomps him because that is a FAST shark-dog-thing), Vox sets up a carnival style Dunk The Radio Demon dunk tank, takes him with him to do things around town while it’s raining and lets him get soaked in the rain (but sometimes/mostly IS holding an umbrella over the both of them because in my mind that’s like the smoothie date okay I feel like Vox would be 🥰 about sharing an umbrella with him), etc. Fluffy deer is left to air dry and catches cold. Proceeds to try to hide it but inevitably fails. Vox mocks him about it but also takes better care of him than Vox takes care of himself. Again like the smoothie date, Vox likes the sort of domesticity of taking care of him. Alternatively OR additionally, Vox actively tries to make Al sicker and hinder his recovery, e.g. by sleep depriving him, making him cold, dunking him in his shark tank, etc.

3. Alastor gets sick and when Rosie clocks him (immediately, mind you), she wants to play house about it with her favorite pet lol. She wants to dress him up in cute pajamas, make him soup and tea and home remedies she swears by, tease him and call him cute, bless every sneeze, give him conjured handkerchiefs or tissue boxes, feel him for fever, check his fever more thoroughly with an old alcohol thermometer and fuss over how it’s gone up a little, etc. Alastor is furious that he has to go through all this patronization, but also just a LITTLE bit deep down, he does kind of like the company, the soup and tea ARE delicious, and maybe it’s just a little bit nice to have someone be sweet to him when he doesn’t let anyone in. Could be a little softened up by fever too. One could do Radiorose about this too or alternatively even sort of a Mama’s Boy Alastor take where he’s sick and being fussed over by Rosie kinda is nice because it reminds him of when he was a kid.

4. Those were Oops All Illness, so here’s a bonus one. Alastor’s at an overlord meeting but he’s allergic/sensitive to something there, e.g. someone’s perfume (lavender oil?), flowers on the table or in someone’s hair, maybe even another sinner themself (dog?), the place they’re meeting could be dusty, etc. This could possibly be intentional like Vox (between No Friends In Hell and Al disappearing for seven years) bringing a lavender-heavy bouquet of flowers as a congratulatory gift for Rosie or Carmilla about some recent accomplishment of theirs, knowing damn well it’ll get to Al. Alternatively, Rosie could intentionally wear/bring something that she knows will set him off as a form of punishing her pet for something slightly disobedient he did, and she usually sits with him at overlord meetings so he’s kind of stuck there. Regardless of intention, he tries to keep it together, participate if necessary, and get out of there ASAP. If it IS intentional though, maybe that person drags out the meeting and makes sure the topic is actually very relevant for Alastor’s side of things so he has to stay longer.

Vox———

3 things I like about him: Nothing.

1. He’s so goddamn soggy/desperate for approval and it’s far too endearing to me lmaoo. Like awgwgwghh the flashback we get of The Offer incident, he’s soooo head over heels for Alast/or and 😭😭😭 the antennas drooping like sad puppy dog ears and big big round eyes and screen filled with static omfg my poor babyyy. There’s one moment from an interview that’s rent free for me where Viv says that was his Most Vulnerable Moment Ever and that he was letting down walls he’d had even when he was alive and, you see, I’m Normal about vulnerability, so I reacted very normally to those statements and think about it a normal amount of times over the last eight months.

And in s1 Stayed Gone 🎶did anybody miss him?? Did anybody even notice??🎶 THEY’RE ENEMIES AND HE M I S S E D HIM SO BAD. S2 he runs around basically going Al Al look at this look at that this is impressive right this is worth your respect and approval right don’t you wish you could have me I mean my big fancy villain tower and stuff. Al says “I respected you” about 70 YEARS AGO and Vox goes from angrily snarling like a fucking dog (because he’s a LOSER) to 🔴__🔴 because Al said he respected him 70 GODDAMN YEARS AGO. And in s2 finale his reaction to Al telling Char/lie to say that Vox is the strongest in hell aND HE CALLS VOX HIS FRIEND THERE AND AGAIN VOX JUST GOES 🔴__🔴 JAW DROPPED BECAUSE AL CALLED HIM HIS FRIEND AND SAID HE WAS ACTUALLY STRONG/CAPABLE I just idk man he’s so desperate for approval—tbf in general too but ESPECIALLY for Al that I’m unfortunately extremely endeared anyway im gonna keep the other answers shorter LMAO

2. I like his character design for pretty much any canon look or era. Very shaped! I could be specific but I pretty much like all of it, especially for s2 where there’s some slight changes to animation.

3. I love his stupid TV gimmick and electricity and tech abilities. S2 in particular I really like how they animate the electricity! I love that when he gets upset it’s so obvious because there’s static, glitching in voice (voice distortions are so Audio!!) and body, electricity, nearby screens are affected, etc.—it makes it so fun to see him get his shit absolutely rocked and then just be displaying TV color bars lmao. And again his antennas work like dog ears!!!! They’re emotive!!!

3 snz/adjacent hcs:

1. If he has any internal sensors that could measure his temperature, for instance, they glitch the absolute hell out when he IS feverish so they’re kinda useless.

2. Heavy sleeper when sick but also tends to fall asleep at his desk or in his like surveillance monitor room, and Val can carry him to bed without waking him any more than maybe stirring a bit.

3. Insecure when sick but tries to pretend he’s not. He’s Pathetic and Weak right now and Perfection Is Their Brand and that’s!! Bad!! That’s why Al left him, blah blah such a rug pull moment that maybe he doubts his other relationships and is worried deep down that they’ll end. So, he doesn’t want Val and Vel to see him Weak but while he’d never say it he craves their approval and closeness more like this.

4. All those hcs were illness, so bonus one to say Mr. Newer Bigger Brighter being allergic to dust in life (even before possible TV-related problems lol) would be very fitting because he likes things new and modern and his aesthetic is very clean (in Hell. Vincent’s cult scene is Not Clean lmao)

3 snz/adjacent prompts or scenarios:

1. Vox gets sick while he still has Al as a prisoner. While Al mocks the hell out of him about it, he also tries to bait him into taking care of himself because he needs Vox to be getting stronger and progressing his power grab so that Al can be free from his deal. So, Vox being slowed down by illness is unideal, especially if he’s Really sick. Al doesn’t want the other Vees to caretake because he wants Vox isolated, so he plays on his insecurities and growing god complex to get him to take care of himself and keep his distance—plus, if this is early enough in the arc, Vox might still be grounded enough to Not Want To Get Them Sick because he care them. 🥺 One version of this is that he DOES end up really sick and Val and Vel have to take care of himself because he Can’t himself and Al’s certainly too tied up to do so lol

2. Poor little baby Box!Vox discovers he is BADDD with dust in his new demonic body. Mayyybe around Al and/or Rosie? 🥺 Al has a lot of vintage stuff that could be collecting dust or they could even go to some antiques store or something together