ᴊᴜꜱᴛ ᴀ ᴋɪᴅ ɪɴ ᴀ ᴅᴏᴍɪɴᴏ ᴍᴀꜱᴋ

he should leave. he should leave right now and not turn around. make it easier for the both of them. leave so he doesn't fuck it up. or fuck it up so they don't miss each other. why should they.

fetch was keenly aware that he should not be here. there was something soft and vulnerable in the bed. maybe it was james. maybe it was himself. maybe it was something different and amorphous. regardless as soon as he looked back, he was lost. of course he was staying. fetch toed his shoes off and let out a sigh.

it was really the look on james' face that was annoying. fetch phillips. weak as anything and very good at following orders. it wasn't an order. it wasn't a command. it was a question.

but fetch could pretend it was the other things so he could pretend that he wasn't doing this because some part of him craved this beyond reason.

he slipped beneath the blanket and hoped he didn't stink. there was something safe here that fetch was almost afraid to touch. but he studied james' face anyway and let his fingers touch it.

anything you needed to look at today?

his voice is low, curious, faintly carrying the amusement he'd so unapologetically indulges himself in the moment fetch had turned back towards him. “ to-do list? well, you, ... though ... “ before he could continue the thought, james's expression shifts into something a little more distant, brows furrowing slightly, lips downturned in a thoughtful frown. work.

they're always about the work, weren't they? who else, if not them?

another sweep of his thumb over the man's cheekbone. the fact that this is about the extent of selfishness he feels he is able to afford frustrates james enough for it to slip into his visage. he wanted to stay close to this man. a man that he had felt a dear fondness, and deep trust for. james wanted be normal with him. sleep through the early morning hours, nose in his hair, breathing him in, not think about contingency plans, target whereabouts, death. what did he have to do today?

“ mmh. i'd like to stay here. “ the words sounded smaller than he thought. that's fine. this was a fine thing to say. james promised his therapist the last time he saw her that he'd be more honest. he withdraws his hand from fetch's cheek. remembers to breathe. honest. “ paperwork, reports. check in with a couple people. conferences, ... more reports on that. “

his nose bumps fetch's. “ y'know , used'ta have people that did that for me, in the kgb. endless paperwork for the price of ‘ freedom ‘. “ a lopsided smirk pulls at the soldier's lips, just in case the sarcasm wasn't as obvious at this hour.

"How so? The tiniest twitch of the corner of his lips as Robert as he watches the man before him. Something about the way that James plays coy about the way he watches the people around them and the near judgement there. Fortunately, he seems to be far more subtle when he does it than Robert himself is. There is a sort of amusement that comes with the fact that he now has a companion in his silent judgement of the people frequenting the bar around them.

“ if you just wanted me to deliver compliments with a heart-stamped envelope, you could've just said so. “ james muses. he feels light today. good. it's easy talking with robert ... much more than most people. whether he'd known james and his titles before their meeting or not, the fact that they can share a more unserious conversation like this meant a great deal to the soldier. sense of normalcy. “ i like you — and when we get to talk like this. “

i do love posting little visuals about james. be it mundane, au, or big canon events. if ever there is a theme/visual that piqued your interest, pls feel free to throw your muse's thoughts at me about it in a dm or ask or something!

i like to listen to y'all talk about your muses too! it helps me in writing my replies, if there is a thread/ask. always feel free to send me your hc/visual/general thoughts on your muses, and i'll share mine with you as well!

what i enjoy most about writing/plotting is thinking of scenes as if they fit in episodes/in a series. overarching themes, side characters, dualities, vibes, and defo character parallels are my jam. cinematographic angles, inner dialogue, ending credit songs, silent acting ... woof!

     besides money, everyone seemed to want answers. if dropping a quick summary of previous events was the price to pay to get supplies and a decent meal, she was willing to throw the soldier a bone. the mutant enters his home, shutting the door behind her. the blonde hesitates to answer his question. only managing to lose the trail of government agents involved in the weapons program hours prior, safety wasn't guaranteed.

     ❝ it's just me. ❞ she replies, noticing the pistol being placed onto the kitchen counter. the blonde steps into the kitchen, greeted by a curious white feline. a ghost of a smile tugs at nessa's pale lips, she bends down gently scratching beneath alpine's chin. ❝ um . . . i'm guessing you wanna know how i found you. your file was in the database where i was being kept captive. along with a lot of other folks. ❞

     the other folks being the employees of the base. the most noticeable being dr. frost, who just bought a fancy apartment in new york city.

luckily for them both, james trusted the cat's judgement almost as much as his own. or at least, the odds of him having to empty a round were very low whenever alpine allowed strangers close. in the end, this was her home and james was simply borrowing it.

ladle replaces the pistol and it takes three ladlefuls of spiced vegetable and beef stew to fill a bowl for their unexpected guest. james sets down the bowl first, then the spoon. a short stack of thin diner napkins sat next to a lone flower in a thin glass. “ great. “ the winter soldier mutters again. huffs. thinks. uncertain. suboptimal. “ her name's alpine. “ he'd read the name scrawled in some notes from the last homeowner, now gone. a small flicker of a practiced smile. “ she seems to like you. “