Space Sniffles: A Comprehensive Medical Reference for the Shooting Star.
Good day, traveler! Exploring vast depths and infinite, matchless planets may seem like any drifterās dream- but beware, as with most good things, thereās risks involved!
Iām not talking about intergalactic bandits or star dust in oneās shoe (not today, anyways). Oh no no, today Iām talking about a nasty little bugā¦
No, not asteroid beetlesā¦ *sigh* are you sure you can keep up?
Iām sure youāve heard of it- itās as common as space junk: Space Sniffles!
Such a cute name! But what is it?
A little ailment caused by a virus dug up as far back as space travel became the new hotness. The exact origin is unknown, though the less mature joke that it came from Uranus, itās just that ass.
Primarily? Makes you sneeze. And sneeze. And sneeze. Its only goal is to spread to as many hosts as possible, replicating itself faster than the speed of light and it loves to take a little trip just as much as you do! It forces your sinuses to produce more and more mucus to try to flush the bugger out. Once infected, expect your nose to constantly tickle, run and possibly even burn. Luckily, it seems to really stick to the nose, only posing as a nuisance. Careful when driving your shuttle! Ya may just sneeze yourself into orbitā¦ or crash into comets.
How long does this sneeze show last?
Up to two whole weeks, so you best hunker down, cadet.
Not exactly. Maybe somewhere out there, there is. As we know it? Not yet.
However, there are treatments to help ease symptomsā¦ good luck finding them, though. Either youāll somehow find some at a rare, well-stocked pharmacy (though these days, if you do, you better count your lucky stars.), or youāll probably have better luck hunting down remedies yourself. Youāre a space cowboy, arenāt you?
Eventually, Space Sniffles gets to us all, so donāt sweat it if you do. Doesnāt make you any less of a gutsy galaxy venturer! ā¦Justā¦ cover your mouth, please!
