The existence of a safeword also implies the existence of a dangerword that you can use to instantly turn any sexual event into a combat encounter
#it exists and it's 'feel how cold my hands are'
cherry valley forever
Xuebing Du
Jules of Nature
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Cosimo Galluzzi
sheepfilms
trying on a metaphor

★
$LAYYYTER
Claire Keane

Love Begins
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
ojovivo
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I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
todays bird
KIROKAZE

JVL

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@shananigansofyochana
The existence of a safeword also implies the existence of a dangerword that you can use to instantly turn any sexual event into a combat encounter
#it exists and it's 'feel how cold my hands are'

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We all need floor time sometimes
the thing is is that you'll be like. 11 years old and someone will tell you that you have to shave your legs. either it will be your mum or a friend or a mean girl in the p.e. changing rooms telling you how gross it is that you have hair on your legs. so then you ask your mum about it and she says yep you have to take this razor blade and drag it across your skin under running water and just hope you don't cut yourself too badly and you have to do this every single week and maybe more frequently than that and you have to do that for fucking ever. the rest of your fucking life. because the hair that grows naturally on your legs is gross and ugly and people will laugh and boys won't like you! of course boys have hair on THEIR legs. but that's normal and even attractive and it's just not the same for you. and a few years later they'll say well you obviously should also be shaving your armpits. and then it's your arms and then it's that you have to wax your upper lip and pluck your eyebrows and ewww why do you have hair on your fingers and your toes.. you need to shave that too. and then suddenly you need to buy spray that will make invisible hairs on your face visible so that you can shave that too! and it's expensive and time consuming and difficult and it HURTS but they just say beauty is pain babe! and you're not allowed to say that maybe if beauty is pain then you don't actually want to be beautiful
and i'm so fucking tired of girls who do shave being defensive when this topic comes up because then i have to say well of COURSE it's your personal choice whether you want to shave or not! no offense! maybe it makes you feel empowered! you do it for YOURSELF! because that's bullshit and i actually DO think you should stop shaving your legs because it's not fucking empowering it's insane. if you give it more than a minute of thought it can't possibly be empowering. you're in a PRISON!!!!! and i was in the prison too okay and i know it seems hard to break out but i promise you it's not. and the more people we can break out of the prison the easier it gets for everyone else i swear to god. please
happy pride
there are a few people actually whose blogs just look like this to me and i hope they know i still love them

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I originally thought your profile pic was a tangela like the pokemon and got excited alas it isn't and my world grew a little dimner
Reblog to save a duck
Quack quack
It’s getting to be that time of year where more people are going outside to parks and stuff so i thought it would a good idea to reblog this again
Once I was feeding some ducks from a bag of birdseed I brought with me, and this woman next to me looked so confused and asked what I was feeding them
When I said it was birdseed she just went “oh- can they actually eat that? Is that safe?”
I didnt know how to respond like, at all, so I just pointed at the duck and said “bird”
She then had a look on her face like a new groove was just forcibly carved in her brain and said softly “oh my fucking god”
I think strange horrible things should stop befalling my friends
I think strange wonderful things should start befalling my friends
It bothers me so much that the healthcare system relies so much on the patient's ability to advocate for themselves, organize their history, and be so persistent against every medical “professional” who says there’s nothing wrong/they can do. But so many struggle with fatigue, brain fog, and face such ingrained systemic barriers, that the people who need and deserve help and support can’t access it.
I saw something recently that resonated with me: “Access shouldn't depend on who has the energy to fight for it.” And I’ve never agreed with anything more.

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the virgin loss.jpg versus the chad xkcd Seven Years
Don’t forget the latest version, Ten Years
@vividaway Randall Munroe is an internet cartoonist who runs the ‘xkcd’ online comic series, which has run from 2006 up to today, with new comics every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Xkcd isn’t an ongoing story, just a series of funny, wholesome, depressing, or oddly scientifically informative comics.
In 2010, Randall’s fiance was diagnosed with stage III breast cancer. He didn’t share too many details at first, but things tended to bleed into his comics: sometimes funny, sometimes sad.
Often in this time, other cartoonists would write in guest comics for Randall, or he’d put in short filler pieces, to try and fill space while nonstop cancer treatments took up most of his time.
In 2012, he posted a comic called ‘Two Years’, about the time since the diagnosis. It’s the one that hasn’t yet been posted here (although parts of it are included in the other comics), and it commemorates some of the things that had happened in the two years since the diagnosis.
There are representations of Randall and his fiance being together for her treatment, worrying together, traveling the world, and getting married. It’s still depressing, but it’s a lot more hopeful, showing how they’ve still managed to have happy moments together, and things will still get better.
Themes of cancer continued in xkcd, but they increasingly became less about fear and nihilism, and more about hope, or just cool facts related to cancer.
At the top of this post is the comic posted in 2017: Seven Years. In it, Randall and his wife are traveling more, trying to have fun and continue old and new hobbies, with cancer ever-present in the background of it all. At the end, the two of them observe the 2017 solar eclipse, and despite all the uncertainty that comes with the thought of another seven years, agree to watch the 2024 eclipse together too.
There are just about no cancer comics between that one and the most recent comic, the one I posted: Ten Years, written in 2020. It’s by far the most hopeful of the three in the little series: the two of them are happy, they’re playing with rabbits and riding on handcarts and going out hiking and stargazing, together. At the end, Ten Years breaks the format with a conversation in which they talk about how unbelievable it is that it’s been so long, and share their worries as well as their hopes. It even ends on a much more lighthearted joke about immortality.
It’s a good comic. Definitely in my top two comics wherein internet cartoonists express emotions about an illness suffered by their wife.
“The ten-year cancerversary is traditionally the Cursed Artifact Granting Immortality anniversary.” -Randall Munroe.
And now, at long last, Fifteen Years:
The first time I reblogged this it was three years after large bastard's heart attack and quad bypass and one year after his transplant.
Now it has been five years since his transplant, and seven years since his bypass.
We went to see the eclipses and drove to see the aurora too.
We went to see the
eclipses and drove to see
the aurora too.
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
The first time I saw the Fifteen Years comic I was sobbing. It still makes me cry.
I’ve followed XKCD on and off since… probably 2007? Earlier? I think I’m like the least parasocial about Randall compared to other creators I’ve followed that long bc in my head he’s legit just a faceless stick figure, and the only things I really know about him as a person are (a) big nerd and (b) wife had a serious and scary cancer diagnosis.
Anyway, literal decades of sharing comics, memeing with nerdy friends, catching up and falling behind and catching up again. Then I see this and it’s like…
My man, I know two things about you, and this comic is also all I wanted for you.
the king has abruptly fired 60% of his wizard staff, so he’s about to be abruptly surprised at who floated 100% of his formerly floating sky castle
I heard they're planning to maintain their levitation rites with autonomous constructs from now on, saying wizards are going to be totally obsolete within the season... so, ah, I'd invest in falling island insurance.
Preserving not-prev-but-someone-elses funny tags in this chain as well because I love both these additions actually,
For visual clarification, last reblog has a screenshot of tags reading:
#ironically the castle has only stayed floating because Archmage Dave was holding all the institutional knowledge from the original team #and also maintaining the Levitation Widget which is crucial to maintaining the gyroscope spells that stop the castle from flipping over #anyway Dave was axed because he wasn't 'innovating' #because instead he spent all day every day maintaining the Widget #hope His Majestoy enjoys sitting in his throne while his house does a barrel roll
Breaking News!
His majesty's castle is stuck doing a barrel roll. Rescue operations are on the way.
Unfortunately, the sky island rescue department has had their budget cut by half by his majesty's treasurer to invest in automation and are now limited in both staff and equipment.
Updates will be provided as the situation develops.
wow, this thing is flinging peasants to the their airy deaths willy-nilly but the king has just ordered the sky rescue team ‘straight to my panic gyroscope no extra stops’
The worst types of cookbook:
The Ottolenghi - it is vital that you use 1g of this very expensive ingredient. It comes from a 500g bag with a one-week shelf life.
The time machine - 15-minute recipe! First, leave to marinate overnight...
The dishwasher - one-pot recipe! Now decant your ingredients and wipe out your pot. And again. And again. And again.
The optimist - cook the onions until caramelised (2 minutes).
The kindergarten teacher - get one nommable little tree of broccoli and bosh that into boiling water. Delish!
The brand names only - ingredients: Ritz crackers, Philadelphia cheese, Cool Whip, orange Jell-o...
The 1950s palate - use one (1) clove of garlic and a small pinch of chili flakes (omit if preferred).
The why bother with a cookbook - to make beans on toast, gently heat a tin of beans and put on top of freshly buttered toast.
#the overachiever: make this very time consuming ingredient from scratch even though it'll end up tasting worse than store bought
Amen to this @akasanata. "Now make your puff pastry from scratch". How about no❤️
I have a fabulous lasagna recipe that calls for either make your own marinara or Classico (brand name specific because the flavor profile is known + it's gluten-free).
Guess which one I always opt for.
Okay, you know what? Given that over the last week I have seen at least one of the common myths of "things you should not do in the heat" come over my dashboard, let us quickly go over this:
If it is hot, you will need to drink more than normally because you are sweating. You can drink too much, though usually your body knows how to regulate it.
Yes, if it is liquid and not alcoholic it counts to your drinking intake. Yes, drinking lemonades, coke and whatever counts. All of it is still mostly water with some sugar and flavors added. It is fine. Be careful about taking in too much caffeine though, as it is a mild diuretic (means it makes you pee more and hence lose more water).
Yes, you also need electrolytes as you sweat them out. But you do not need to drink sports drinks. Eat some yoghurt with fruits, or some watermelon with salt, or maybe cold soup. It will refill your electrolytes.
No, it is not dangerous for you to sleep in front of a ventilator. This is a complete myth that has absolutely no basis in science whatsoever and literally originates with an Urban Legend. Especially with the recent heat wave in Europe for a lot of people the alternative is the possibility of heat stroke. It is fine. Sleep in front of that ventilator. Just make sure you are not getting too cold.
No, using sunscreen does not stop you from taking in Vitamin D, unless you are permanently using super high standard sun screen and are reapplying it every 6 hours as intended. And let's face it: you are not. Your skin gets enough UVB to make Vitamin D, don't worry about it. Skin cancer is worse.
Yes, switching between a very hot outside and a very cold context (be it super high AC or just jumping into cold water) can be a danger for your cardiovascular system, though unless the weather is very hot or the water very cold making the contrast very extreme, it is normally not a danger to people who do not have otherwise issues with their cardiovascular system. Though being a bit careful and allowing yourself to acclimatize is not a bad idea in general.
Yes, you should definitely not leave any living thing in a car while it is hot. Just don't. Cars heat up while standing very quickly and will become a death trap. If you leave an animal or a child alone in the car for even just 5 to 10 minutes, they might die. Don't do that shit.
Yes, you need to be extra careful about your medications. For once, most medications are not meant to be stored at above 25°C (don't ask me what this is in American units). But also a bunch of medications - especially psychoactive medications - will make your body worth at temperature regulation. So be careful.
Yes, you need shadow. Ideally the shadow of trees, because there is indeed a difference between that and the shadow of a building. But any shadow is good, especially during extreme heat.
In the same vein: be also careful about drugs during heat waves - like, the recreational type. Some of them work differently when your body is warmed up like that. Just... ideally read up online on possible side effects that might occur/be worse if taken during the heat.
Generally speaking: stay hydrated. Stay cool. Try to do it as well as you can in your respective situation. Stay safe.
i just saw a post on reddit titled "the writer is cooking but the food doesn't agree with me" and it was about OP clicking off a fic because they don't like the direction it's going in. slightly different context but can we all be more like this reddit OP. i think "the writer is cooking but the food doesn't agree with me" should be the new "don't like don't read." dead doves may give you diarrhea but don't make that everyone else's problem.

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“Your ancestors are amazed at all your spices!”
“Your ancestors are impressed that you are an educated woman!”
“Your ancestors are proud that you are thriving in spite of what society did to them and you”
It’s all very sweet! But! Necromancy! Is! Still! Illegal! Your ancestors are going back in the ground!
Stop resurrecting them to show off!
The thing about Harry Potter is it just makes me fucking tired?
I don't especially give a shit if somebody is reading the books or watching the movies in private, but if you're being loudly, stridently, openly fannish about it you've got to be aware at this stage of things how that's perceived? At the bare minimum, being perceived as transphobic wasn't a deal breaker.
A doll forum I frequent is discussing whether or not to ban pictures of Harry Potter merch, and wow do I recognize a lot of the people going "Um, nobody cares about politics actually, sweetie" "Why does everything have to be political?" as having said some virulently transphobic shit elsewhere.
Someone asked me ":( So you want to DIVIDE people?"
Yes. You can't UwU Let's All Get Along about whether or not a given group of people should have human rights.
You can't shake the devil's hand and say you're only kidding.
You can't shake the devil's hand and say you're only kidding.