Script Sharing

Never a bother! Apologies if this reply is late.

I'm sorry you're not getting more positive comments. It is really frustrating to work hard on something, only to feel like people don't appreciate it. And comments bothering you to update can be especially stressful.

First, a reminder that comments, kudos, etc aren't really a reflection of how good your writing is. Sometimes less well-written things get a lot of engagement, sometimes really great things don't get much at all. It depends on a lot of factors, and one of them is honestly luck. I'm sure you already know this, but it bears repeating.

Second, I know it feels hard to do when you're already not getting many comments, but remember you can always delete comments that are rude or stress-inducing. It doesn't necessarily stop people from leaving them, but it encourages them not to since they're clearly not being received well, and keeps you from having to see them whenever you go in to add a new chapter.

Thirdly, if you have any friends, online or off, who are into the fandom(s) you write for, try sharing your fic with them! Friends are frankly often a much better and more reliable source of positive feedback than random people on the internet. Or, if you don't have any friends in the relevant fandoms, make some! See if you can find a group chat or discord or something to join and start talking to people there, and try linking a fic once you're comfortable. So much of the positive feedback I've gotten on my own writing has been from friends and acquaintances I shared my work with. Also, if you're comfortable doing so, you can always try sharing/linking to your fics on tumblr or your other social media of choice. Engagement is often higher on actual social media, and just like with any other online content, more promotion usually leads to more engagement.

And finally, remember that if you're feeling really frustrated and writing is losing its fun, it's also ok to take a break for a while. You don't owe anyone content - you're writing for your own enjoyment. And if you're not enjoying it, sometimes you need to take a break for a bit and come back to it later.

I hope this was helpful in some way, and that you start getting more positive feedback soon. ❤

Making an appointment with a new doctor or dentist can be really intimidating. Especially if you’ve never done it before. But it can actually be very easy if you know what information you’ll need, and what to expect in advance.

Below a cut because it’s a little long.

Step 1. Find a doctor

The first step is actually finding a doctor. Personally, I tend to do this by going onto my insurance company’s website, logging onto my account (or making one if I haven’t yet), and looking them up there, since many companies have a tool to help you find someone in-network (aka that they’ll actually cover). If not, then calling your insurance company to ask for a list of in-network providers near you is also a good option. Basically, you wanna check beforehand that your insurance will cover the person you’re seeing. (For a crash course on the basics of health insurance in the US, check out this post.) Once you have a list, you can narrow it down however you like. Look up online reviews. Check what hours they’re open. See how close their office is to you/how easy it would be to get to. Do you want someone of a specific gender? Do you need someone who speaks a certain language? There are a lot of factors you can consider. It’s also important to make sure the doctor you pick is currently accepting new patients, which you can usually find either on their clinic’s website, or by calling their office.

Step 2: Get your information ready

Once you have a doctor picked out who’s covered by your insurance and accepting new patients, it’s time to get ready for the call. Make sure you have your insurance information on hand, as they’re going to ask what company you’re covered by, what your ID number is, and what your group number is if you have one. If you’re covered under a parent’s insurance, you’ll also need your parent’s full name and date of birth. If you’re covered by more than one insurance plan, make sure you know which one is your primary insurance and which is your secondary, and that you have the information for both. (If you have insurance that you signed up for yourself, and insurance through a parent or partner, the one that you personally signed up for will be your primary insurance.) Once you have your insurance information on hand, pull up a calendar and figure out what dates and times you can schedule an appointment for, or if your schedule is fairly open, what days and times you can’t schedule an appointment for. This way, when it’s time to schedule, you won’t be scrambling to find a calendar or remember when you’re available. Finally, make sure you know your phone number and address, as they’ll most likely ask for these.

Step 3: Call

There are some doctor’s offices that will allow you to schedule online, which is great, but a lot of them still require you to call in. If you call, when the receptionist asks how they can help you, tell them “I would like to schedule an initial appointment with [doctor you picked].” They will say ok, and then ask you for your personal information. They’ll almost always start by asking your name and date of birth. Then they’ll ask for your insurance information and contact information. Sometimes they’ll ask if you want to talk to the doctor about something specific. If not, then you can tell them it’s just a checkup because you need a new primary doctor. If there is something specific you’re going in about, let them know what it is so the doctor can be better prepared for you. If there are multiple problems you need to be seen about, bear in mind they can usually only put down one thing for insurance reasons, so tell them the most important one/the one you want to address first. Anything else you can bring up with your doctor during the appointment, or at future appointments. Once the receptionist has all the information they need, it will be time to schedule. Usually they’ll tell you what the soonest opening is for the doctor, and from there you can either take that appointment, or ask about availability on other dates and/or times as needed. If you have very specific needs, like you can only make it on Tuesday mornings for example, it’s best to say so directly. This makes it easier for them to narrow down possible appointments for you. Most importantly, remember to write down your appointment! You don’t want to hang up the phone, only to realize you forgot when the appointment was actually scheduled for. You can always call back and ask (and I promise the receptionists won’t judge you), but it’s more convenient to just write it down or put it in your calendar while you’re scheduling.

Step 4: Success!

You did it! You scheduled an appointment with a new doctor. The clinic will likely send you a packet to fill out, either by mail or email, so make sure to check for it and fill it out before your appointment, and bring it with you to the office. This will ask about your medical history, contact information for your emergency contact(s), and likely have some forms or waivers to sign. If you have any questions about these, the receptionists at the office can usually help you, either by phone or in-person. On the day of the appointment, remember to bring your insurance card, as well as a payment method with you if your insurance requires a copay. If you have specific things you want to ask the doctor about, it’s a good idea to write a list of them so you don’t forget.

First, I'm gonna say don't feel bad about not knowing how to respond to complements. I have trouble with it most of the time. It can be surprisingly difficult!

The first thing, though, is try not to brush it off, argue, or deny it. This is a super common response, but it's best to accept compliments; it makes the person who complimented you happy, and can help improve your own self-esteem!

In general, a simple "Thanks!" or "Thank you!" is usually perfectly fine, no matter who a compliment is from. It shows you heard and are accepting the compliment, and appreciated it, and there's nothing wrong with a short response. Especially if a person compliments you a lot. If you want more to say, you can always follow that up with something about the positive feelings the compliment gave you. "I'm glad you like it!" or "It means a lot to know you appreciate my [trait/skill/action they complimented]," for example.

If you really want to, you can compliment the other person back, but don't try to "out-compliment" them, or brush off their initial compliment by doing so. If someone compliments your shoes, replying with "Thanks! I like yours too!" is great. "Oh, thanks, but yours are so much cuter!" or "No, yours are cute!" is not.

And, since this ask is about your girlfriend, I'm sure a little sign of physical affection after you say "thank you," like a small peck or kiss on the cheek, would be appreciated.

I hope this helps!

Aah I'm so glad!! We've been a little quiet recently, but we're definitely still here to answer questions and suggest scripts whenever needed. I'm glad someone was able to connect you with us!

(Also, an app where you could like, choose a situation and get script options would be Very Cool and if I knew anything about programming I'd try to make one.)

I mean, it’s certainly a way that you could. And is an understandable impulse, given the situation. However, it might not be the clearest way. Passive-aggression gets your mood across, but not always the exact point you want to make. You would probably be better off telling them something like “I’m not interested in continuing this friendship. You’re consistently rude and manipulative towards me, and you refuse to change or apologize when I call you out on it. Please don’t [call/text/IM/etc.] me anymore.” Not because you don’t have every right to be angry or frustrated towards them and to express that, but because you want to make sure there’s no room for misunderstanding. You don’t want them to be able to say “Well I didn’t realize you never wanted to talk to me again!” or something like that.

Hello! I’m sorry if it’s been a long time since you sent this. None of us have been super active on here lately. I hope things worked out for you!

For future reference and anyone else reading this, I maintain that honesty is the best policy. As unpleasant as it can feel turning someone down, it’s much better than not being direct and possibly making them think their feelings are reciprocated. A simple and direct “Thanks for the thought, but I’m not interested in dating anyone, and I would prefer it if you didn’t try to set me up with people,” is going to both get the point across to your friend, and let the person they’re with know that you’re not interested, but in a gentler way.

Not weird at all! It can be hard knowing what to say. The first thing I'll tell you though, as a fanfic writer myself, is that even comments that just say "I really liked this!" or "This was great!" are wonderful to get. You don't have to get in-depth and detailed about it.

If you do want to get more in-depth, though, consider talking about a line you particularly liked. You can even copy it as you're reading to paste into your comment. Then you can say something like "I loved this fic! I really liked this line in particular: [paste line here]. It really (made me laugh/sounded just like the character/made me cry/was beautifully written/etc.)" This option takes a little more time, just because you have to 1. Pick a line and 2. Think about what you liked about it, but it can be a good place to start if you want to leave longer comments.

That said, once again, please don't feel bad if all you say is "sgfkghyx omg i love this fic so much!!" Because again, those make writers just as happy. I promise. ❤

(And if you want more examples of comments that make fic writers go "awww," a friend of mine started the blog @ao3comments-that-water-my-crops a while back which has tons of examples of various lengths and levels of coherancy.)

I'm sorry anon, that sounds like a really rough situation. I would explain to the person that while you know their intentions are good, they're actually hurting you by acting the way that they are. For example:

"I know you're trying to help, but when you do things like this it makes me feel like you don't care about me as a person, just as a "case" for you to "fix". But mental illness is complex, and while it can feel nice for some people to think that you can just love it away, it's not true. What I really need is professional help. Your insistance on trying to "cure" me yourself is really only making me feel worse."

If this is a person you want to keep around, maybe let them know some ways they can actually support you. Support from family and friends in appropriate ways can be very helpful, after all. Let them know what you would actually find helpful and appropriate. This could be things like checking in on you, helping distract you when you're in a rough patch, listening to you vent, or any number of other things. Consider the kinds of support you appreciate getting from other people in your life, or the kinds of support you would like to get, and tell them those.

However, if this is a person that you're not interested in continuing your relationship with, whatever kind of relationship it may be, then instead let them know that you don't feel comfortable keeping in contact with someone who treats you that way. You are more than your mental illness, and deserve to be treated as such. If they are going to continue to act as though it's your defining feature and they're only interested "helping" or "curing" you, be it as an ego boost or for some other reason, then you are not interested in pursuing the relationship further. (This can also apply if you try to maintain the relationship as proposed above, but they continue acting in the same way and making no real effort to change their behavior and attitude.)

I hope this helps, and wish you the best of luck.