Under a Clear Sky, In a World Untarnished,

"Waiting Gradually Eats The Soul"

hey so about this

it's not like every other part of my body gets checked annually for no specific reason?

that's actually a very common thing. regular wellness exams, generally every 1-3 years, are very much recommended for most people. it's a good habit to get in as an adult, because it gives healthcare providers a chance to catch any notable changes in your body from year to the next that might be indicative of burgeoning health problems. yes, even if you feel completely healthy. the thing about m a n y conditions is that you don't notice them, until they start causing problems. the point of preventative care, of which regular exams are a part, is to catch these things before they're an emergency.

I'm glad to hear that don't have any menstrual issues or STIs! that's awesome. but a lack of sexual activity doesn't make you immune to infections or cysts or fibroids or cancers. it also doesn't mean that you'll have perfect health forever, and I generally recommend that someone's first visit to a healthcare provider doesn't happen in a time of crisis in the same way that I generally recommend people don't want to see a therapist until they're already in the middle of a breakdown. it's not a bad idea, of course, and it's better late than never, but the breakdown may have never happened in the first place if the care had been sought out before things were quite so dire.

I mean, I do like spiders

what?

what got me through some of the toughest days and most draining interactions was hanging on to what the Goal was. the Goal, for most patients, was to get them to the dispensary to dose. that's it. and my job was to make sure they were able to get that, no matter what, and be very clear about how that could happen. our clinic has no 'security' staff--no guards, nothing of that sort--we have hospitality staff, who engage with people as people. (to my knowledge, at least from the time i've been working here, we only have actually called local cops once, and it was related to a firearm on site). so if someone was yelling loudly or causing a disruption, the priority was to speak to them and basically just explain, hey, we want to get you dosed, but you can't yell in the waiting room. if you have to yell about something we can call your counselor down and see if they have time to hear you out. or you can go yell outside and come back in when you're done. that sort of thing.

with that said, as much as i know that i was always trying to help people, there were MANY of my coworkers that brought their prejudices in with them. a woman who trained me on the front desk was incredibly harsh and judgmental, often talking about patients behind their back. we had (and have) clinicians or counselors who bring their own ideas of treatment into work. despite us being a harm reduction clinic, there are people who only see 'full recovery' and complete cessation of use as the only acceptable outcome. these are the kinds of people i've seen experience this kind of 'empathy fatigue' the most. the people who have a very set idea of what THEIR goals, not the patient's goals, are.

those kinds of people typically don't last super long at our clinic, but some are also carryovers from previous eras and have been there for 20, 30 years.

a lot of the time, just from my experience and what i've seen, this lack of empathy comes from a ridiculous set of expectations that have nothing to do with the person in question, and it's always boggled my mind why people would pursue this kind of work if they can't see that. if i didn't like getting yelled at at the front desk i'd always be willing to say, hey, talking to me like that and treating me like that isn't nice. i'll obviously still send you through to your appointment or dose or whatever but that really hurt me and i'm just trying to tell you the message on your chart, i'm just a messenger. and i have had some people come back and apologize. and some didn't. and the job was definitely draining, and there were good days and bad. but i didn't feel much different from like...retail. like, sometimes i had people at the register at nordstrom treat me worse.

ptrn comic update :3