#interpersonal relationships

Millie and Moxxie are interesting, they embody everything you mentioned about how vivienne writers relationships. Upon my rewatch for HB season 2, they got worse. In season 2 when the show made a steep decline. They devolved. Moxxie is still insecure, incompetent and spineless but needs someone to talk down upon to lift himself up (blitz) and he becomes a sycophant when someone shows him the slightest bit of attention (blitz, Chaz, and now Stolas) but instead of that being a negative trait that Moxxie needs to grow from they make it his only trait. Millie feels under appreciated and not important so she married Moxxie because his crippling insecurity will make him latch on to her and worship her, thus making her feel important and all she has to do is lie to him and tell his great when he isnt. However this backfired on her because in season 2 episode 4, unhappy campers, Moxxie feels threatened by her because she’s the best fighter, assassin and gets the job done and he’s the one making her feel under appreciated and she needs we to feel worth something. At the end he learns to appreciate her more,

Now this could work as an intentional unhealthy marriage like Beth and Jerry from Rick and Morty, but like Vaggie and Charlie it’s not intentional, vivienne wants to make you believe that this type of dynamic is healthy and pure. Just stop fighting and learn to apprentice your partner more.

WRONG

She THINKS she is manipulative and evil. That's what mental illness like trauma and Bpd will do to a brain. Make you believe that you are the scum of the earth and that that's why your relationships never work out. That it's your fault no matter what is really going on.

"like she sees through all my tricks" some thought she literally meant that she was tricking Pomni. She THINKS that by being a normal person reaching out to Pomni that means she was being seen as "tricking her". Cause again, she sees herself as manipulative even if she isn't because that is what was done to her. Probably with her mother. And constantly blames herself for any small problem in a two sided interpersonal relationship. Even if there is no tangible problem at all.

The woman asked casually(converstionally) if I was in a relationship and I said nope, single as a Pringle *which is what I always say the underlying symbolism means nothing*.

But the she looked at me without judgement or critique or pressure and gently asked: Do you want to be?

She asked it with more weight than the first question. Like that was the question that really mattered.

And I realized it's the first time I think in my whole life that someone actually asked me what I wanted for myself as far at any future relationship holds.

And while I genuinely don't know, because the last romantic interest I had ended so catastrophically and painfully the idea of someone romantically pursuing me or even touching me makes me want to trash like a trapped animal and vomit, I also still am hungry and longing for that deep connection and intimacy that still comes with a romantic relationship.

But I had never been asked if I wanted to be in a relationship before. If I told someone I was single I was always told "well you'll find someone eventually" or "you shoul find yourself someone nice" or whatever other pressured and pushed idea of "ope can't have you being alone, that won't do" that seems to invade everyone's minds to the point it feels obsessive.

I love that someone asked, especially someone I know for damn fact wasn't trying to pursue me or guage interest, it was simply a conversation.

Those who hate themselves, tend to project that hatred onto others. Those who are unhappy with their own lives, tend to make others unhappy. Misery loves company. Those who are miserable tend to want to make others miserable.

“The here and now is a prison house. We must strive, in the face of the here and now’s totalizing rendering of reality, to think and feel a then and there… Queerness is that thing that lets us feel that this world is not enough, that indeed something is missing.” — José Esteban Muñoz, Cruising Utopia

“I want a world where friendship is appreciated as a form of romance… I want a world where our worth isn’t linked to our desireability, our security to our monogamy, our family to our biology.” — Alok Vaid-Menon

Our Manifesto

Romance is inherently queerphobic

The organisation of queerness around the celebration and pursuit of romantic desires and pleasures reinforces queer oppression

"be okay with friends and loved ones not talking to you! be okay with friends and loved ones leaving you for months on end! don't ever expect anyone to text you back! omg you want friends to actually CONTACT you? you feel hurt when you're always the one reaching out? wow just say you hate mentally ill people and go!"