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@pyropretzel

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op i hope you don't mind but i made this gif non-looping and it has been sending me into hysterics every time i think about it
"less is more" is a lie perpetuated by big small to sell more less
him?
NDA stands for Non't Dalk Aboutit
I wish these people were oppressed
stop tagging this saying shit like “me and jakey!!! 🥺”
Hi! I’m an afab nb with major social anxiety and my partner is an amab, masc-presenting nb who babies me appropriately, I know this is talking about straight couples but like. You can’t tell by just looking at stick figures, just like you can’t tell my partner and I are nonbinary just by looking. Straight-passing queer couples exist and don’t deserve hate just for appearing straight. Straight couples can even have queer individuals involved, one or both could be binary trans, or one or both could be bi.
I hope nonbinary Jakey also dies

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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me with the. When she. When her. When the she her me
One time a friend told me that if she wanted to have a chill night she would come to me and ask for tea and a book to read. I didn’t like tea at the time, but I always made sure my cupboards had them in case she needed a quiet night. One time I told my boss that I loved oranges, but couldn’t peel them because of my nails. For a year he made sure to peel me one at least once a week. Once my friends gave me a made up superlative of “most likely to have a pen they could borrow” and ever since I’ve made sure I always carry a pen with me. A long time ago, my high school librarian told me that no one would care what my grade in my sophomore chemistry class was if I’m bringing them doughnuts and asking them about their day.
Sometimes friendship is about carrying pens and peeling oranges. But the point is, surrounding yourself with people who you want to do the little things for. The point of it all is bringing in the doughnuts because you’ve found the people who deserve the doughnuts.
How sweet it is to be with people you enjoy taking care of
I'M GOING TO DO THIS TO MY BOOBS AS THEY GROW IN TO APPEAL TO THE MINECRAFT PORN CROWD
what if we both dreamed about each other

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Advice for women?
lesbian sex
transition
⚔️ 𝗡𝗲𝘄 𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗺! Sharp Tongue Weapon (rapier), rare (requires attunement by a bard) ___ You’re proficient with this magic weapon while you’re attuned to it, and you deal an extra 1d4 psychic damage to any creature you hit with it. If the creature has been been targeted by the “vicious mockery” spell since the start of your last turn, the psychic damage is increased to 1d6. In addition, while holding the weapon, your spell save DC for any “vicious mockery” spell you cast is increased by 1, and you can cast the spell as a reaction when a creature that you can see misses you with a melee attack or provokes an opportunity attack from you (rather than making the attack), targeting that creature with the spell. ___ ✨ Patrons get huge perks! Access this and hundreds of other item cards, art files, and compendium entries when you support The Griffon’s Saddlebag on Patreon for as little as $3 a month!
thank you australian government from protecting me, a child (21 year old) from the scary hells of the internet
she says he won't let her get a dog, which is fine, because they're in an apartment, and that's the kind of thing people say about their partners. he won't let me get a dog. and you're at a dinner party and you tilt your head a little to the side just like that dog he won't let her get, because is this the thing that's going to upset you? you don't know every corner of their relationship, she could be joking, they could have had so many healthy conversations about the dog, right, and maybe she's not letting herself get the dog because of money and time and whatever. but, like, she did say let
and she wants to move away from his hometown and he wants to stay and then he tells you with a wink and a conspiratorial stage whisper don't worry i'll convince her and she laughs about it - so clearly this is something they laugh about. but you do just stand there and stare at him like what the fuck, man. you can't say what you want to say which is why do you get the final say on everything because they're both obviously aware of the other person's stance on this and have obviously had private conversations about it and what are you going to do about it except make a scene and then he'll be mad at you and call you one of those bitches behind your back and she'll cut you off, which is a loss that doesn't feel worth it just because he makes you a little skeeved out every 3rd comment
and they both agree he just isn't the type to get flowers which is fine because everyone shows love differently, and are you really gonna judge someone based on their sense of individual relationship responsibility? maybe he's constantly cleaning her car and writing her poems and making her furniture or something. maybe she doesn't even like flowers and this is perfect, actually. and no you couldn't date him, obviously, ew; but like, she tells you she's happy. you almost send her a tiktok that says don't be 25 and the cool girl that doesn't need anything, you'll hate not getting flowers at 30, but that's like, starting drama & you shouldn't start drama needlessly.
and you're a little older than her but not so much older you can pull the whole trust me on this one babe thing and besides that wouldn't have worked anyway (when does it ever) and besides you have trauma so you and your therapist both agree that you're always looking for a problem even when there isn't one. and you tell yourself that just because you see them for 15 minutes every month does not mean you can identify every single red flag based on a single shitty half-joking(?) comment
and besides, what are you going to do? she says i actually wanted another stand mixer but thankfully he stops me when i'm about to spend too much money and you're standing there like are you okay? is this normal? is this just something people say? and again - what are you going to do?
to your therapist you try to language it - it's not, like, any of my business. but sometimes, doesn't it feel like - you should do something. there's got to be something, right? you've tried dropping little hints but they sail right through and you've tried having a single serious conversation and she got upset because why does it matter to you, yes it's different but we're happy, it doesn't need to make sense to you and you're like. really unwilling to push a boundary about it anymore; because the truth is that you know logically it shouldn't matter to you, as long as both parties are happy.
and besides, you've been wrong before. it's just... like, every time you see them both, something else happens, some kind of shiver down your spine like do you even hear each other when you talk. it's their strange, bickering orbit. just the way he's on his phone through dinner or watching sports instead of helping in the kitchen or, fuck, another one of these little throwaway comments he makes about we'll see about that, babe. she laughs when he calls her passions stupid shit and meanwhile she gets him tickets to see the knicks and he tells you well at least she's smart about something and still! it's none of your business.
you say get the dog anyway and she laughs. like, this is is you being funny. and not you saying - no really. get the dog. get the dog and get out of here. pack up and start running.
If the woman that JK rowling posted an upskirt photo of had been a cis woman snopes wouldn't have said this was "mixed" and you know it.
Not that it was necessary, but I looked up definitions, and yeah, obviously "taking a photo under someone's skirt" is literally it. Fuck Snopes so fucking hard. I need them to explain to me how it doesn't fit the definition to a fucking t:
And what the FUCK do they mean, "public setting"?? Yeah, upskirts are mistly taken in public fucking settings! That's not an eycuse, that's part of the fucking issue
And truly what do they mean it was in public? Does that mean that the upskirt photos people take on subways dont count because other people are around? OF COURSE IT WAS IN PUBLIC THATS HOW THE PHOTO GOT TAKEN IF SHE HAD BEEN PHOTOGRAPHED AT HOME IT WOULD HAVE BEEN BREAKING AND ENTERING
what do they mean "it wasn't taken surreptitiously"? there isn't any implication here except that because Freda Wallace was in public, she consented to any pictures that might be taken of her? this is just "look at the way she* was dressed". snopes is doing rape culture.
https://archive.is/Nv1K1
according to archives the first version of the snopes article listed it as "true," but it seems to have been changed. given rowling's widely known history of extreme and aggressive litigiousness i'd be willing to bet her legal team probably objected and snopes caved

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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C'mon, this can't be fucking real.
Again, completely unable to differentiate between antisemites and American zionists (but I repeat myself)
tumblr won't let me post this for some reason. must be a glitch or something