Hoofin' It Spritely

kingpin: ...this changes nothing.

electro: [very clearly uncomfortable but not willing to interrogate what that says about himself] so is this, like, a permanent thing?

rhino: you are...AH!! [drops the bags of money he's holding and gives spider-woman a bone-crushing hug] MY FRIEND!!! YES!!! my cousin's wife, she is like you as well! beautiful woman. maybe you know her? you do not? is not how that works? i see. you two must meet. we will arrange dinner after i break out from raft again. uhp--no arguments. i have decided.

vulture: this is exactly what fox news warned me about...

green goblin: good for you, bug! though don't think i'll go easy on you because of this. after all, you and i both know i don't have a problem killing girls! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

sandman: [after five minutes of failed explanations] oh, like the thing rhino's cousin's wife has

white rabbit: girl!!! me too!!! no way!!! you know, this is perfect timing actually, beetle and i have been looking for a third, if you're interested...

lizard: [really not getting it] ssssso you have to inject yoursssself with girl DNA how often? seemssssss inefficient. you know, connorsssss only injected himself with lizard DNA the once. maybe you ssshould assssk him to make girl DNA for you.

doc ock: [known the whole time] so...you finally figured it out.

mysterio: [trying to fuck with her] so...you finally figured it out.

mr. negative: [gives a single, curt nod and doesn't say anything but makes sure to gender her correctly during their fight]

morbius: HISSSSSSSS!! spider-man!! vhat brings you to zhis dark corner of the city, at so late an--vhat? spider...woman now? [drops the accent] oh hey that's sick. listen if you need an endocrinologist i know a guy. he's over in brooklyn so it's a bit out of the way--oh you're going to diy? no that makes sense. hey, i really appreciate you telling me. no it's no problem at all. thanks! [starts doing the accent again] NOW BEGONE!!! FROM MY LAIR!!!!

electro again: [still really uncomfortable] i just don't think it's an unfair question to ask. remember that time you were like all mean and had the four extra arms and you said shit like "the die is cast?" how do i know this isn't another one of your phases?

carnage: [sprinting down the street on all fours holding the first syllable of a slur like piccolo charging his special beam cannon] fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffFFFFFFFAGGOTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!

That's what V-coding is. That is why they are so adamant about sending trans women to men's prisons, because sex trafficking trans women within the men's prison system is an essential part of that system. Being misgendered by this isn't even an issue that's on our radar!

"I mean, in a sense you've already forgotten your name since you don't have direct access to that information mentally right now, even if the 'why' there is 'you're not currently thinking about your name.' To 'make you forget' is to install a limiter in your mental process that stalls the retrieval process so something that would typically be easily accessible on command becomes something you mentally refuse and obfuscate the refusal. This is actually how a lot of social niceties work, where it becomes convenient to 'forget' something and instead store it in your intuition where you can still access it when it's import-"

"mommy I wanted to be a dumb slut not a smart one"

"Actually, bimbofication in the traditional sense is the trivialization of background pattern-recognition in favor of small-scale heuristic functioning, put together with the aesthetic trappings of desirability. Binding your mental processes to heuristics actually takes a very smart slut who takes the time to make her background processes efficient, otherwise the bimbofication will stall out over repeated sessi-"

Shut the FUCK up.

He DID do it, you KNOW he did it, and it was cool as fuck and he KNOWS it.

Everybody who was trying to pretend he didn't do it should never post again.

The optimistic tale of the modern, involved dad has been greatly exaggerated. The amount of child care men performed rose throughout the 1980s and ’90s, but then began to level off without ever reaching parity. Mothers still shoulder 65 percent of child-care work. In academic journals, family researchers caution that the “culture of fatherhood” has changed more than fathers’ actual behavior.

Sociologists attribute the discrepancy between mothers’ expectations and reality to “a largely successful male resistance.” This resistance is not being led by socially conservative men, whose like-minded wives often explicitly agree to take the lead in the home. It is happening, instead, with relatively progressive couples, and it takes many women — who thought their partners had made a prenatal commitment to equal parenting — by surprise. Why are their partners failing to pitch in more?

The answer lies, in part, in the different ways that men and women typically experience unfairness. Inequality makes everyone feel bad. Studies have found that people who feel they’re getting away with something experience fear and self-reproach, while people who feel exploited are angry and resentful. And yet men are more comfortable than women with the first scenario and less tolerant than women of finding themselves with the short end of the stick. Parity is hard, and this discrepancy lays the groundwork for male resistance.

Though many men are in denial about it, their resistance communicates a feeling of entitlement to women’s labor. Men resist because it is in their “interest to do so,” write Scott Coltrane and Michele Adams, leaders in the field of family studies, in their book, “Gender and Families.” By passively refusing to take an equal role, men are reinforcing “a separation of spheres that underpins masculine ideals and perpetuates a gender order privileging men over women.”

While interviewing working parents for a book on parenthood, I spoke with one dad in Vermont who said: “The expectation among my male friends is still that they will have the life they had before having kids. My dad has never cooked a meal. I’ve strayed from that. But subconsciously, the thing that makes you motivationally step up and do something when you’re not being asked …” he trailed off, and then said: “I have justifications. It’s a cop-out.”

Take love out of the equation and focus on the workplace, and it’s clear how this plays out. Studies show that male employees sit back while their female co-workers perform the tasks that don’t lead to promotion. In a series of lab studies, the economists Lise Vesterlund, Linda Babcock and Maria Recalde and the organizational behaviorist Laurie Weingart found that in coed groups, women are 50 percent more likely than men to volunteer to take on work that no one else wants to do. But in all-male groups, the men volunteer just as readily.

In an interview with NPR, Dr. Vesterlund explained that the women do the work “because they’re expected to.” The men “come into the room, they see the women, they know how we play these games.”

We play the same games at home. I interviewed couples separately and found that the women were often angry, while many men didn’t seem to realize there was a problem.

The couples offered three explanations for this labor imbalance. The first was that women take over activities like bedtime, homework and laundry because men perform these tasks inadequately. But this isn’t “maternal gatekeeping,” the theory that men want to help but women disparage their capabilities and push them out. Instead these seem to be situations that necessitate the intervention of a reasonable adult.

A mother in California said: “It’s important to me that my sons are not falling asleep in class and that they’re not late for school. My husband does not share those priorities, so I do bedtime and school drop-off.”

The dad in Vermont explained: “I do laundry when I need it. When it comes to the kids’ laundry, I could be more proactive, but instead I operate on my time scale. So my wife does most of their laundry. Let me do it my way and I’m happy to do it, but if you’re going to tell me how to do it, go ahead and do it yourself.”

The second explanation involved forgetting or obliviousness. A mother in Illinois said: “My husband is a participatory and willing partner. He’s not traditional in terms of ‘I don’t change diapers.’ But his attention is limited.” She added, “I can’t trust him to do anything, to actually remember.”

A dad in San Francisco said that many of the tasks of parenting weren’t important enough to remember: “I just don’t think these things are worth attending to. A certain percentage of parental involvement that my wife does, I would see as valuable but unnecessary. A lot of disparity in our participation is that.”

Finally, some men blamed their wives’ personalities. A San Diego dad said his wife did more because she was so uptight. “She wakes up on a Saturday morning and has a list. I don’t keep lists. I think there’s a belief that if she’s not going to do it, then it won’t get done.” (His wife agreed that this was true, but emphasized that her belief was based on experience: “We fell into this easy pattern where he learned to be oblivious and I learned to resent him.”)

A father in Portland, Ore., confirmed that his wife takes on more but said: “It has to do with her personality. She always has to stay busy. No matter what day of the week it is, she has a need to be engaged, to be doing something.”

Many mothers told me they had tried to change this and had aired their grievances with their partners, only to watch as nothing changed. A mother in Queens said she spent three years trying to get her husband to do more before coming to terms with the fact that maybe it was never going to happen. “He notices the unfairness, but he just accepts it as something we have a disagreement about,” she said. “How much convincing of the other person can you do?”

All this comes at a cost to women’s well-being, as mothers forgo leisure time, professional ambitions and sleep. Wives who view their household responsibilities “as unjust are more likely to suffer from depression than those who do not,” one study says. When their children are young, employed women (but not men) take a hit to their health as well as to their earnings — and the latter never recovers. Child-care imbalances also tank relationship happiness, especially in the early years of parenthood.

Division of labor in the home is one of the most important gender-equity issues of our time. Yet at the current rate of change, MenCare, a group that promotes equal involvement in caregiving, estimates that it will be about 75 more years before men worldwide assume half of the unpaid work that domesticity requires.

Bill Nighy

Hugh Laurie

James McAvoy

John Lithgow

Katherine Parkinson

Keira Knightley

Kit Harrington

Leo Woodall

Mackenzie Crook

Mathew MacFadyen

Matt Berry

Nick Frost

Paul Whitehouse

Peter Serafinowicz

Riz Ahmed

Shirley Bassey

Simon Armitage

Simon Pegg

Stephen Fry

Stephen Mangan

when i asked whether their autistic classmate's meltdown was dangerous or merely uncomfortable, they said, "i felt like i was in danger!"

yes you should, actually. that's life. upsetting things happen. no one should have to experience any discomfort. but we do. we get stung by bees and sunburns and headaches. we live in bodies in the world.

autistic people are human beings who have the right to exist in society, including during meltdowns. having one class of your entire semester interrupted by a singular meltdown is not anymore of an infringement upon your entitlement to education than having your class interrupted by a fire alarm or cancelled for a snow storm.

one of my peers once experienced a cardiac event 10 minutes into class. it was terrifying. it was desperately upsetting. i was contacted by the school and offered counseling because i happened to be the one who managed the situation until paramedics arrived. everyone was worried about my classmate first and foremost, and then about me. no one blamed anyone, and certainly when my classmate happily recovered and returned to school, no one thought they should be removed from the program.