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YOU ARE THE REASON
#extradirty
occasionally subtle
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@nebulaswritings
“we were lovers in a past life” trope but the current incarnations are enemy-to-lovers trope. when.
To be clear. I don’t want “our past love ended in betrayal and anger and now we hate each other.” I want “we died in love and in each other’s arms” but the current incarnations do NOT remember and they ARE trying their best to End the other one and these new sudden flashbacks to lovingly holding each other’s hands is EXTREMELY UPSETTING
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trans princess whose parents arrange her to be married to a foreign prince both to humiliate him and to punish her for refusing to hide and misgender herself for the rest of her life, so she’s sent away, terrified of what kind of rage and abuse she’ll be subjected to by her new husband once he sees her and realizes what’s happened.
but when she arrives and is presented before him, it turns out he’s thrilled. trans people are adored in this kingdom. her parents have accidentally done him an incredible honor in betrothing her to him, and suddenly, she goes from surviving in protest in her home to being showered in gifts and affection from her new husband-to-be.
she’s spends the night before she arrives so scared that she can’t eat or sleep and she’s contemplating if she should run (she’ll be caught) or if she’d at least die with some dignity and as herself if she does it by her own hand now. and the next night, she finds herself seated at the head of a banquet while her husband plays out a wedding ritual where he brings her grander and grander gifts, each time refusing that they’re enough to win her heart and leaving her with more treasures to fetch another. one of them is a wedding dress—she was not even given her own to bring—but he places it in her lap and says, “No, no, I’ll find one better now that I’ve seen your face and know what colors will bring out your beauty.”
and then he panics a little because she starts crying. only it’s just relief. it’s a relief that’s been withheld for her entire life. she’s safe. someone wants to prove he’s worthy of loving her. she’s safe.
her parents wait for her to be rejected, or better, executed, because they didn’t do their research and assumed whatever hatred they held was twice as barbaric in a land not their own, and they think her only worth will be as an excuse to go to war.
and then not a few months later, they find out she’s happily married and that with the complete knowledge of their kingdom’s economic and military situation that she’s shared with her husband, he’s quite intent on generously bringing their land under the banner of his own rule. for their own good, of course.
trans princess whose parents arrange her to be married to a foreign prince both to humiliate him and to punish her for refusing to hide and misgender herself for the rest of her life, so she’s sent away, terrified of what kind of rage and abuse she’ll be subjected to by her new husband once he sees her and realizes what’s happened.
but when she arrives and is presented before him, it turns out he’s thrilled. trans people are adored in this kingdom. her parents have accidentally done him an incredible honor in betrothing her to him, and suddenly, she goes from surviving in protest in her home to being showered in gifts and affection from her new husband-to-be.
As a person who is not only Am-pinoy, but loves history, (select areas) of Precolonial Philippines would have loved a trans princess to marry their prince - trans women with many indigenous Filipino groups were considered normal or even sacred and many became Asog/Babaylan/katalonan (important spiritual figures)
Like this story could potentially have happened, y’know
( fun fact! many historians say the Filipinos were genderless but there are 7000 islands and many many different indigenous groups with many information missing and destroyed - so working with what we have, we know many groups were not genderless but viewed gender different compared to today. Gender was important to groups like the Tagalog or the Visayan-but not based on “biology”. If you wanted to be a woman then you were seen as a woman and same with wanting to be a man. It was about embodying the energy of your perceived gender and not what genitals you were born with. Not all groups embodied this belief given diversity etc, but we have evidence of many indigenous groups from Luzon and a few from southern islands did not ascribe to gender like we have today until the Spanish set foot on the islands. And many indigenous groups around the world held similar beliefs on Tranness and third genders, many of that history and belief was hurt significantly by colonization!)
A few souces!
One of the most controversial, interesting, and popular subjects here at The Aswang Project is the discussion on articles about gender – par
(Cw for this ^: this page directly quotes old texts of Spanish missionaries and they do use the term hermaphrodite- be warned. But it’s a great text with great historical sources to back up the discussion on gaps missing given colonial invasion)
October observes LGBTQIA+ history and Filipino-American history. We were queer, divine feminine before the colonizers came – we should turn
LGBTQ+ History Month: Queer Culture in Pre-colonial Philippines | Imperial College Union
writing advice that actually made my writing worse
okay but can we talk about writing advice that actually made my writing worse for a second
like not in a “this is bad advice for everyone” way in a “this absolutely sabotaged me personally” way
because ??? some of this set me BACK
1. “show don’t tell” (taken too literally) this one almost ruined my prose
i got so scared of “telling” anything that every sentence turned into… over-explained action
instead of writing:
she was nervous
i’d write:
her fingers tapped against the table, her leg bouncing, her breath uneven, her gaze flickering toward the door--
and it just KEPT GOING
like yes, showing is important but at some point you’re not “immersive” you’re just exhausting
2. “cut all adverbs” this made my writing feel so stiff it hurt
i started replacing simple phrasing with weird, clunky sentences just to avoid using one single “-ly” word
like… why am i doing gymnastics to avoid “quietly”
no one is giving out medals for adverb avoidance 😭
3. “write every day no matter what” this one burned me OUT
because instead of listening to my brain when it was fried, i forced myself to produce words i knew weren’t going anywhere
and then i’d reread it later and hate everything i wrote
which made me want to avoid writing even more
consistency matters, yes but forcing it when you’re running on fumes just trains you to associate writing with dread
4. “plan everything before you start” this killed my excitement SO fast
i’d spend weeks outlining every detail and by the time i actually started writing…
the story already felt “done” in my head
no curiosity left. no momentum.
now i leave gaps on purpose so i actually want to keep going
5. “make your writing sound pretty” this is the one that made my writing feel the most fake
i was so focused on making sentences sound “good” that i stopped focusing on what was actually happening
everything turned vague. floaty. kind of… nothing
like yeah it sounded nice but nothing hit
now i care way more about clarity and impact than sounding impressive
6. “your first draft should be terrible” okay this one is half true but also messed with my head
because i took it as: “don’t even TRY”
so i’d write things i knew weren’t working and just leave them
instead of… fixing them a little? making them better?
your draft doesn’t have to be perfect but it also doesn’t have to be painful to read 😭
idk i think the biggest thing i’ve learned is:
advice isn’t universal
what helps one writer can absolutely wreck another
so if something is making your writing worse, harder, or more miserable
you are allowed to drop it. immediately.
no guilt. no “but everyone says this works”
like okay… it doesn’t work for ME.
and that’s enough.
A tradition
In peacetime, the ruler grows their hair long. In war, they cut it short. A ruler with long hair is held in great esteem, for defending the peace. The traditional declaration of war is for the ruler to send their cut-off hair to the enemy ruler. The statement carries greater weight the longer the hair: to receive long hair says that you have angered one who is slow to anger, that you have incurred a wrath not easily woken.
Violent war-mongering leader frantically and aggressively tries to shave just a LITTLE hair off the top of their head into an envelope.
A faraway king receives a heavy wooden crate filled with a coil of the longest hair he has ever seen.
A despised ruler finds hundreds of pounds of cut-off ponytails at her castle entrance, each one belonging to her own people.
A young emperor refuses to cut their hair and insists on trying to make peace with invaders. The enemy leader steps forward, draws their blade, and cuts the emperor’s hair themselves.
Hellen cuts her hair off and throws it in Cathy’s face at her son’s soccer scrimmage.
When you’re balding/bald, you’re considered no longer fit for war and have to pass on the duty to your children (or whoever you trust who happens to still have hair)
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The iron hand of Götz von Berlichingen (1480-1562), a knight and mercenary who lost his right arm in a siege [640×360]
points about this -it was shot off by a cannon -he continued being a knight for over 40 years after getting the iron hand -it was delicate enough he could still write with a quill using it, which is important as he was described as a ‘warrior poet’ -after a merchant-punching life suitable for an elder scrolls protagonist he was outlawed by the holy roman empire, friends of his used a high diplomacy roll and a bribe to get him out, and he then almost immediately kidnapped a bishop -after outlaw of the holy roman empire 2 electric boogaloo was placed under house arrest in a castle he had purchased with all his quest rewards to spend the next 20 years drunk off his ass
I can’t believe you’d make this post and not mention that his poetry contains the first known usage of the phrase “lick my ass”
A quick google says there’s a german movie about his life but I can’t seem to find a link/download and I NEED THIS LIKE AIR.
@orchidbreezefc
That’s a 16th century prosthetic arm all right, but not Gotz von Berlichingen’s.
(1) As the OP states, he lost his RIGHT hand, but the OP photo shows a LEFT hand. Even if it’s a flipped photo, it’s still not his hand because…
(2) The actual hand(s) look like this:
The German Wikipedia entry suggests that the cruder (”Dorfschmied” means something like “village blacksmith”) but sturdier “Iron Hand Mark 1″ was for regular wear and simple gripping tasks…
…while “Iron Hand Mark 2” with complicated insides for performing delicate actions like manipulating a pen…
…was itself too delicate for everyday use and was reserved for special occasions as “Sunday Best”.
Here are those complicated insides…
Besides holding a pen, I wonder could it do a fingersnap…
:-P
The iron hand of Götz von Berlichingen (1480-1562), a knight and mercenary who lost his right arm in a siege [640×360]
points about this -it was shot off by a cannon -he continued being a knight for over 40 years after getting the iron hand -it was delicate enough he could still write with a quill using it, which is important as he was described as a ‘warrior poet’ -after a merchant-punching life suitable for an elder scrolls protagonist he was outlawed by the holy roman empire, friends of his used a high diplomacy roll and a bribe to get him out, and he then almost immediately kidnapped a bishop -after outlaw of the holy roman empire 2 electric boogaloo was placed under house arrest in a castle he had purchased with all his quest rewards to spend the next 20 years drunk off his ass
I can’t believe you’d make this post and not mention that his poetry contains the first known usage of the phrase “lick my ass”
Hey, not sure if wholly correct this is the earliest explanation I can find of this image on tin eye. She mentions
"theyll hate you for this" "but theyll be alive" is THE juiciest thing to me
i will ensure you stay alive above all else. even if what i do to make it happen is horrendous. even if it violates all your wishes or moral principles. even if you can never look at me the same way again, even if you hate me for it. because at least if you hate me it means youre alive
Story idea: the local Academy of Magic has an Archaeology Department. They have an ongoing feud with the Necromancy Department because necromancers keep stealing bones from the archaeological lab, and archaeologists keep interrupting necromancy rites to ask the undead about their funerary rites.
The two departments also keep arguing over which one of them has the highest count of “ooops-found-an-ancient-evil-thing-and-almost-destroyed-the-world”.
Imagine that the paleontology department invites them to do a ritual, and the whole academy is preparing for Jurassic Park, but instead they are simply being asked to revive Nautilus or something
“ So, just to be clear, you are NOT trying to rise any big carnivorous creature, right?”
“Nah, man, relax, we are not stupid! We are just asking you to revive the molluscs that were in these little shells for some minutes. Just enought to make some observations. Come on, we even made an aquarius.”
“Well, I mean, I guess we can give permission for that…”
(1 hour later)
“FUCK YOU, I knew it, you released the Kraken!”
“Alright, YOU >points at archeology professor< Stop digging up things, and YOU >points at Necromancer professor> stop bringing them back to life. You have gutted the budget for capital repairs to this campus for the next six years, already!”
There was a budget?!
Not any more
The Addams Family renting out rooms in their huge mansion cheaply to broke college students.
The students digging it because the craziness and the bugs are pretty much the same as any other dorm house. Also, Morticia and Gomez treat them all like visiting cousins, not like tenants to abuse and exploit.
One of the tenants is a creative writing major and Gomez and Morticia house them up in the tower because of the quiet and the inspiring view
They’re supposed to be working on a typical coming-of-age story but after living with the Addams for just a week the project is becoming a horror-Gothic-romance
They go to their room after classes one day and find Thing correcting the grammar errors in the manuscript with a red pen
and yeah, the students pay roughly market value for their rooms, but that doesn’t stop gomez from shouting “capital idea!” and handing them wads of cash when they tell him about their weekend plans or what they’re researching, so they basically end up living there for free
In the same vein, half the them have to turn into exceptional fencers, because Gomez just doesn’t give a shit, and if he sees you in the library, its fucking Sword Fighting Time.
Fester and Pugsley find out one of the college students is trying to get into chemistry and woo boy, there has never been a faster study of how to counter various acidic chemical reactions due to “water” balloons in campus history.
Morticia and Grammy are keeping the horticulturalists on their toes with their Black Tulip/Rose hybrids, which can flick their barbs a foot away from their stem system. But it’s fine, one of the kids has managed to breed Aloe with the anti venom.
Lurch makes sandwiches for everyone who’s too much of a coward for Grammy’s cooking. Any music major will find him looming over them, utterly stone faced as they practise until they finish, when he’ll smile, and slowly applaud.
And the spookiest thing of all
Wednesday and Thing will find your thesis. They will critique it in every way imaginable.
There is no escape.
I especially love the idea of Gomez spotting a student in the library, throwing a sword at a startled student, shouting, “En garde!” and lunging at him/her with a sword of his own.
Student (later in life), when asked how she jumps from quietly doing research to handling a sudden influx of ER cases so quickly and easily, says, “When you have to snap out of deep concentration on biochem to fight for your life then get back to biochem without losing your train of thought…you learn or you die.”
This has made me laugh so hard-
And you know how chatty Gomez is when he fights, he’d probably help more students work through creative blocks via swordplay than any education counselor in a stuffy little office.
Gomez Addams as the embodiment of the Rubber Duck Method for struggling students via surprise swordplay is directly on brand.
And I firmly believe that long-term residents who finish their degrees suddenly, mysteriously, find that their student loans have been paid off. The family attends every single graduation ceremony and claps and cheers for “their” students as boisterously as any parent. They make a particular point of doing so for the ones who have no other family in attendance.
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Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.
Might I add:
The defeat of the wizard who made people choose how they’d be to be executed
The woman who raised the changeling alongside her biological child
The human who died of radiation poisoning after repairing the spaceship
The adventures of a space roomba
Cinderella finding Araura (and falling in love)
I don’t know a snappy description but the my nemesis cynthia story certainly lives in my head
hilariously, these are almost all in my fic tag. so, a compiled list from the notes (and some extras):
The God of Arepo (graphic novel 1 / 2 / 3) (ebook)
The Monster of Sentan
The Witch’s Cat
Raise Both Children
Stabby the Roomba (honorable mention)
Cinderella Marries the Prince (comic)
My Arch Nemesis Cynthia
Pirates and Mermaid
Eindred and the Witch
The Demon King
The Cornerwitch
Grandmother Beetroot
Apocalypse Daycare Worker
Grandmother Accidentally Summons a Demon
New Year Saga
A Story About Changelings
Ranger in the King’s Forest
The Difference Between a Hare and a Rabbit
Goblin Men (Canines)
I am in love with you /p
Adding Faceblind Prince Charming and Cinderella
21. The human who died of radiation poisoning after repairing the spaceship
22. The defeat of the wizard who made people choose how they’d be to be executed
adding the Doctors Without Borders one
I LOVE tumblr storytime, so here’s a bunch more your weekend reading. Enjoy!
24. The Queen with Three Cursed Children
25. Tiny Dragon with one coin hoard
26. Haunted house
27. Shark hero was about to go rogue
28. Grandma lives in the woods comic
29. A Different Aftermath comic
30. Battery (microstory but I love it so much)
31. It’s A Date comic
32. Supervillian kidnaps rival’s kid and they want to stay
33. Narrative Town
34. I have been hired to clean the wizard tower comic
35. Robot Apocalypse
36. The Statues That Do Not Weather
37. Kushiel
38. Tooth Fairy
39. Alien abduction
40. Felonious wish-granting
41. When humans met actual space orcs
42. Space cousins
WAIT REBLOG THIS VERSION INSTEAD
I feel like witches are sedentary and wizards are migratory. A witch has a home, a cauldron, herbs, you go to them with your problem. A wizard wanders, disappears, shows up at inconvenient times to fix nothing. am i making sense
some good theories in the notes but I choose to believe those are made by a village or perhaps king as an artificial home, to attract and keep a wizard. like a beehive
While artificially built towers do attract wild wizards a wizard will naturally build their own tower as they enter the later stage of their life cycle. For the first couple hundred years of their lives wizards are extremely mobile and may travel almost anywhere in the world or even beyond. A tower usually begins as a workshop which the wizard returns to during their migration in order to store trinkets and artifacts which they collect during their travels. As the collection outgrows the available space in the workshop a combination of the concentration of volatile magical energy and the wizards natural desire to build secret passageways causes them to begin expanding the workshop. This usually starts with basic "bigger on the inside" magic but due to constraints around energy usage for sustained large scale spacetime warping they will eventually turn to more traditional methods of building. There are some documented cases of wizards whose workshops expanded outward instead of upwards, resulting in labyrinth structures rather than the more traditional tower. It is still unclear what environmental pressure causes these divergent structures. As the wizard ages and their exploratory phase winds down their travels will focus on a progressively more narrow subset of arcane knowledge until they find one secret of the universe complex enough to prompt their transition into the final stage of the wizard lifestyle. By this point they will almost certainly have a fully fledged tower or have settled into one they've found already existing. Their desire to travel is generally severely reduced by this point and outside of quests to discover certain highly specific items related to their studies it's possible that they might not leave their tower for months or years at a time. In some cases they may begin this phase several times if the secret they started pursuing is less challenging or less fundamental to the operations of the universe than expected. When they do find their final subject of study and find the answers they sought, they will finally reach the end of the wizard life cycle, either via death caused by hubris, merging with a larger consciousness, ascendence to a different plane or to godhood, or metamorphosis into a litch. Other wizards may sometimes occupy the abandoned towers of a former wizard but most will move on in order to build their own before entering into these later stages. Very rarely a particularly social variety of wizard may build several connected towers and share resources, these are called schools and over time they will tend to attract a large number of younger and weaker wizards seeking shelter.
Absolutely brilliant analysis of wizards and their migratory patterns through the ages. I can personally verify that this is accurate, and you may now consider this properly peer reviewed and accepted.
@lumateranlibrarian
It’s all true. Also, wizard towers are the only safe places for them to pupate because of all the natural predators.
the merging of wizard towers is what you'd call a university.
Yeah I saw the lovecraftian horrors and didn’t succumb to madness. What- no I’m not a cultist, James. For Christ’s sake. What you’re forgetting my friend is that HP Lovecraft wasn’t a flexible man. His brain simply wasn’t stretchy enough to take it all in. I however, have short term memory issues. Flexibility is the name of the game when you can’t remember if you ate lunch or not. What’s the size of the universe? Big. You knew that already, James. Come on now. You don’t need to witness the terrifying ocean at the base of the entirety of reality itself to know that. Pass the brandy.
You must imagine the character I’ve created here wearing a suit and a monocle, by the way.
During a Eldritch Horrors based tabletop RPG my character was a young dandy who wasn't particularly interested in all this monster mystery stuff but his father (my brother's character) was a researcher who WAS very into it, so Bertie went along to make sure the old man didn't get into too much trouble. It was your average Eldritch Horrors RPG in that you don't make your characters with the expectation that they will survive for very long, both the game itself and the genre are very intent on turning your characters inside out, driving them insane, and blowing them up in no particular order.
The thing was, everything in this nightmare hellscape just seemed to keep coming up Bertie because the man was too stupid to realize what genre he was in. Every time he had to roll for a sanity check whenever he saw something crazy, the dice treated him so well that he just... didn't get it. Gee that sure is a funny costume. There's something wrong with that dog. These mean guys in stupid hats are trying to hurt that young lady, we can't have that! I had not built him this way, his intelligence stats weren't even that bad, random chance just made it so that this man was living a scooby doo adventure while everyone else was being consumed by The Horrors. The final straw was at the end of an adventure when Bertie escaped from the cultist headquarters by breaking out through the mansion's front window on a motorcycle with a hot rescued sacrificial maiden clinging to his back and leading the cultists on a merry chase through the hedge maze while the other adventurers escaped. His sanity score? HIGHER than when the adventure had begun. He had found the whole experience quite thrilling and felt very good about life in general! Bertie retired from adventuring to marry the maiden he rescued and care for his aging father and delight and bemuse his friends at the gentleman's club with stories of his 'wacky' adventures. I didn't want to risk breaking his ridiculous lucky streak.
You can also deal with eldritch beings by just not looking to hard. Don't attempt to take in every detail and let yourself get distracted by random shiny things nearby.
THE CUTEST OF ALL TIME
day nine of @/pinksplace & @/wildflowersandvibranium galentine's collab <3
guy gardner x fem! reader (+ surprise cameo)
He’s already practising the apology in his head, mentally preparing to deal with your sad stare, the disappointment that you’d try your absolute best to hide. He’d promised to be home by Valentine’s Day, but as usual, the galaxy seemed particularly inclined to fuck him over at every available opportunity.
You’d be understanding, a hero yourself, you’d often had to cancel plans at the last minute. Still, that didn’t erase the hurt that often came with those sacrifices.
The front door’s kicked open with more force than intended, making him wince and freeze when it bangs against the wall and disturbs the peace of your quiet apartment.
Keeping up with Earth’s time was practically impossible in the endlessly dark void of space, and it wasn’t until he’d re-entered Earth’s atmosphere, taking in the silent and deserted streets, that Guy realised how late he was.
I love the idea of dead gods. Not in the sense of “hey i killed something supernaturally strong” but in the sense of “i killed it and it’s still a god.” It is still worshipped. prayers are still answered. miracles are performed in its name, even as it lies pierced by a thousand swords and burning with chemical fire. even as it drifts through vacuum, decapitated and bleeding molten rock. in cosmic spite of being shot through each eye and hurled into a plasma reactor, it still radiates the power of the divine in a way that primitive death cannot smother. the nature of godchild is not so simple as to be tied to the mortality, or immortality, of any living being.
In science that's called a whalefall :)
dead gods on the bottom of the mariana trench
You killed the container but released the energy unto the cosmos.
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Ship lanterns, English, Dutch and French, 17th to 18th century
I’d like to think the reason why Mages live in towers is just by accident.
Mages live in normal houses, but their magic does weird stuff to their home and stretches the house up into a tower. It’s also why powerful mages tend to have really big hats and overstretched robes.
This could also extend to why Mages don’t wear metal armour; it’ll just stretch and grow and get too heavy to use. Cloth is a safe option, and they can just cut away the extra fabric.
A mage’s staff is just their first wand but stretched.
This is also why witches tend to favor cats as familiars.
Cats may pick and choose when to be stretchy, which both makes them naturally immune to magical stretch effects and and fantastic at insulating their master’s environment against any unintended environmental magi-warp.
Which is why the only examples of non-streched mage housing are all _witch’s huts._
