thanks dude

every time i say velociraptor is very important to imagine a turkey-sized predatory bird and not the weird lizard thing from jurassic park

Looks like shed be real tasty roasted over an open flame. Or soup

Fuck off and be nice to her?

No theyre not disorders theyre winning conditions. Ill get 1.5x exp and 1.2x gold at the end of my life

I couldn’t date a tsundere because she’d say something like “I don’t even like you! Hmph!” and then I would run directly in front of the nearest car

if i was a dark lord i would probably first establish that i have absurd powers in private then soley focus on optics and my realms economy, playing defense the whole time. as soon as i feel my title shift to 'the morally grey lord' i know the genre shifted enough and i can start using my absurd powers that no longer feel cohesive to the greater canon and be backed by a fiercly loyal powerscaler faction to force the writer to acknowledge i still have them. then immediately kill the hero in its grounded and plausible armor made of materials and methods available at the time with my 'ultra dark energy beam'

if i was a dark lord i would not do any of that i would lie in my castle all day and jerk off if i could muster the energy

happy trails on tummy happy trails on tummy happy trails on tummy happy trails on tummy happy trails on tummy

I’m starting a gofundme to get a mojito

really good at being lovesick and silly about it

Evil Marx be like Das Lowercase

this is how lesbians text when you’re trying to figure out where to go for dinner